Also Yesterday...
Zack works out of town, 3, sometimes 4 days a week. So Wednesday or Thursday is when I typically get a call along the lines of, I'm home, do you want to come over? Yesterday this took the form of a Facebook IM. I was more than ready for some Zack time, but I also suggested he be a little more romantic in his delivery. Zack disagreed. It started looking to me like another one of those relationship situations where the male partner feels perfectly comfortable expecting to have what HE wants, without considering that that needs to be balanced with giving the female partner what SHE wants. So I broke up with Zack.
Then I cried a couple of (silent, at work) tears, and generally felt uncomfortable. I was trying to sit with my feelings, and accept them. I was thinking to myself that this is a major step, breaking something off when it stops working for me, rather than tolerating things I dislike. Go me, except that it doesn't feel good.
Zack, of course, called me a short time later, wanting to discuss the matter in person.
Now, every weekend when I'm out with Zack, I suggest we go to the Hunt Club, which is owned by a school classmate of ours, Kelli. The bar is struggling financially, and I think we should be giving Kelli our business. But Zack always refuses, saying that his nemesis
The tale of Zack's nemesis is oh so high school incesturiffic.
Zack's nemesis is Alastair Cooper, who is a JayCee along with Zack. Alastair is a dick to Zack sometimes which pisses Zack off.
Now, who is named Alastair, really? But it gets better. Alastair has 2 brothers, Ian and Colin. Are you getting a certain flavor here? Their mother's name is Alwyn. British, you guessed it. She actually sat next to me at Thanksgiving Dinner 2002, at my parents'. She had never deigned to speak to me before, but on my dad's side I was raised with European table manners, which she noticed during the meal and suddenly decided to like me.
The reason Alwyn was at my family Thanksgiving was that my 187 years ago, my aunt went to HER high school reunion (same high school of course, mais oui), and out of 80 people in her graduating class, 40 of which we might assume are male, she managed to hook up with someone and get remarried. And it happens she married Ian Cooper. Remind me here, why was it that I was in such a hurry to get the hell out of my home town?
might be there, and as Zack has epilepsy, getting pissed off might give him a seizure. However, I had spoken to Kelli earlier, and she said that nemesis has a newborn these days, and doesn't come in the bar any more.
So when I got to Zack's, I told him we were going to the Hunt Club, and that nemesis wouldn't be there, so not to worry. To which Zack replied, "What- don't you get along with him?" That is surely Zack's fatal flaw, he forgets things.
In any case, we had Leinenkugel and mussels, which were amazing, and talked about the rules of things. And I have to observe the two sides of the matter: on the one hand, Zack feels unsure of whether to/how much to invest/how to handle dating someone poly. But on the other hand, what Zack feels is exactly the same thing that EVERYONE feels when they begin to navigate their first poly relationship. So what I'm saying here is, it is hard to know how seriously to take someone's feelings, when they are the same feelings every poly person once had, and we learned to deal with them. Truthfully, it leads me to a wait and see attitude.
Once we got things sorted out (surely not for the last time!), we went back to Zack's, where I lured him onto the living room sofa and tried to give him some surprise fellat. But he wasn't having it. He was all like, Is this all you want? Don't you want to go upstairs and x,y,z? Damn, what a contrast. Ex boyfriend LOVED that style of things. So we did go upstairs and x,y,z, and I decided not to stay over since I had to work today, and I'm hoping to have a chill weekend at home or maybe the quarry.
While we were lying in bed, Zack started again with the "You're so pretty." It still surprises me when he says that, because, you know, he's one of THEM. Then he added, "And I really like...your figure." Zack is obviously not the first guy to like my body, but I still find it surprising and endearing =)
Then I cried a couple of (silent, at work) tears, and generally felt uncomfortable. I was trying to sit with my feelings, and accept them. I was thinking to myself that this is a major step, breaking something off when it stops working for me, rather than tolerating things I dislike. Go me, except that it doesn't feel good.
Zack, of course, called me a short time later, wanting to discuss the matter in person.
Now, every weekend when I'm out with Zack, I suggest we go to the Hunt Club, which is owned by a school classmate of ours, Kelli. The bar is struggling financially, and I think we should be giving Kelli our business. But Zack always refuses, saying that his nemesis
The tale of Zack's nemesis is oh so high school incesturiffic.
Zack's nemesis is Alastair Cooper, who is a JayCee along with Zack. Alastair is a dick to Zack sometimes which pisses Zack off.
Now, who is named Alastair, really? But it gets better. Alastair has 2 brothers, Ian and Colin. Are you getting a certain flavor here? Their mother's name is Alwyn. British, you guessed it. She actually sat next to me at Thanksgiving Dinner 2002, at my parents'. She had never deigned to speak to me before, but on my dad's side I was raised with European table manners, which she noticed during the meal and suddenly decided to like me.
The reason Alwyn was at my family Thanksgiving was that my 187 years ago, my aunt went to HER high school reunion (same high school of course, mais oui), and out of 80 people in her graduating class, 40 of which we might assume are male, she managed to hook up with someone and get remarried. And it happens she married Ian Cooper. Remind me here, why was it that I was in such a hurry to get the hell out of my home town?
might be there, and as Zack has epilepsy, getting pissed off might give him a seizure. However, I had spoken to Kelli earlier, and she said that nemesis has a newborn these days, and doesn't come in the bar any more.
So when I got to Zack's, I told him we were going to the Hunt Club, and that nemesis wouldn't be there, so not to worry. To which Zack replied, "What- don't you get along with him?" That is surely Zack's fatal flaw, he forgets things.
In any case, we had Leinenkugel and mussels, which were amazing, and talked about the rules of things. And I have to observe the two sides of the matter: on the one hand, Zack feels unsure of whether to/how much to invest/how to handle dating someone poly. But on the other hand, what Zack feels is exactly the same thing that EVERYONE feels when they begin to navigate their first poly relationship. So what I'm saying here is, it is hard to know how seriously to take someone's feelings, when they are the same feelings every poly person once had, and we learned to deal with them. Truthfully, it leads me to a wait and see attitude.
Once we got things sorted out (surely not for the last time!), we went back to Zack's, where I lured him onto the living room sofa and tried to give him some surprise fellat. But he wasn't having it. He was all like, Is this all you want? Don't you want to go upstairs and x,y,z? Damn, what a contrast. Ex boyfriend LOVED that style of things. So we did go upstairs and x,y,z, and I decided not to stay over since I had to work today, and I'm hoping to have a chill weekend at home or maybe the quarry.
While we were lying in bed, Zack started again with the "You're so pretty." It still surprises me when he says that, because, you know, he's one of THEM. Then he added, "And I really like...your figure." Zack is obviously not the first guy to like my body, but I still find it surprising and endearing =)