Building Fertile Valleys Again - Part 3

[randomfreshink]

Title: Building Fertile Valleys Again - Part 3

Original Title: Eroding Away the Mountains

Original Author:

Comments

[sidlj]

Wow, it's fascinating how you've re-used parts of the first story, taking them into the future. It's so true, we tend to repeat conversations as years go by, sometimes on purpose and sometimes not even realizing we're doing it. And we try to duplicate experiences, re-visit favorite picnic spots, take familiar hikes in different seasons.

I am filled with the Sam'n'Daniel love! :-)

repeat, and repeat

[randomfreshink]

I think I fell in love with Sam and Daniel -- as a pair you really don't want to turn loose on their own -- in Cold Lazarus, when the two of them 'borrow' Teal'c's staff weapon to shoot at the crystal in the gate room, setting off every alarm, and Teal'c asks if they got permission to fire it, and they're both 'oh, of course' and you just know they're both lying their asses off about that

[abyssinia4077]

Okay, first off I'm really, really, really sorry it took me so long to read and comment on this story, Random! I've had a really hard time recently focusing on long fics, and took me a long time to read through it and that wasn't really fair to you.

Reading this was really weird at first, but once I settled down and got into it and really realized what you were doing, it got to be really cool. It was neat seeing a reflection of my own narrative-style twisted around someone else's style and cool seeing all these story elements/flipped - like the fics are giant mirror images of each other - definitely a creative way to approach things.

I really like the first bit - Sam struggling with almost losing him again, just after they've got him back and that bit of awkwardness at learning each other again (and Daniel's reluctance about the bike!)

She gets him on the back of her bike, after he's made yet another face when she hands him her spare helmet from her locker. But his arms wrap around her-now he's all over her and she's smiling.

turning a phrase

[randomfreshink]

I'm so glad you didn't hate this -- I've not done a remix before and I can't help but feel there's other, better ways I could have turned this. I also can't help but say what a wonderful excercise it was--it was facinating to step inside your prose and take it apart and see what I could do with it while trying not to violate the core of what you'd done

[vipersweb]

I really like how this bookends the original story - how you bring in elements from Abyssinia's fic into this one, just it's in the future rather than in the past. I love the sense of friendship and maybe something more that exists between Sam and Daniel in this, how it is the two of them that can get under each other's skin enough to work out the problems. That even after all the years of Sha're's death, Daniel still thinks of her and Sam thinks of her and asks Daniel for stories. The last bit too, with Sam on Atlantis and Daniel deciding to go for a hike and take sam with him. Just beautiful and it goes wonderfully with Abysinnia's fic.

remix

[randomfreshink]

The bookending was what I wanted to do, but I'm not sure I really carried off the remix all that well--it's hard to do with such a great story as this, which is just perfect as it is without a remix. But I'm glad you liked.

[cofax7]

I just came across this; after watching "Ark of Truth" I was in the mood for some good SG-1, and this really hit the spot. Lovely, leisurely, warm and thoughtful. What a great examination of Sam and Daniel and their various relationships.

[randomfreshink]

Thank you so much -- but I must give Abyssinia4077 all credit for such great stuff to play with in this remix. Her story is just so good, that all I had to do was not screw it up -- she has such solid structure and pacing and good team stuff.