[ AUDIO ]

[armorumvigiles]

[There's the crackling of audio, fuzzy noise, and the Guide turns on to something that's supposed to be a conversation between a few individuals. There's very little context for the back-and-forth that's being broadcasted now:]

...And it's been six months! Six months! Can you believe it?

I see. And he hasn't made the offer of living together as

Comments

[audio]

[halcyonism]

I believe you may be too kind-hearted for this job....

[audiojack~]

[halcyonism]

[ WHAT DID YOU WANT HIM TO SAY? "Basch, you suck at this job. Start acting like a cunning salesperson and do some damn advertising!"? ]

Is that so...? But don't you agree he would be more suitable for a kinder, gentler job?

[ Like... petting ponies.... ]

[audiojack~]

[halcyonism]

...Some prodding, hm? It sounds like you've already got something in mind.

[ STARING SUSPICIOUSLY AT THE GUIDE. ]

[audiojack~]

[halcyonism]

Of course. What kind of Leading Man would he be if he didn't?

[ Obviously not a Leading Man, Larsa. Luckily, Balthier -is- a Leading Man! ]

...But I do find it difficult to be any sterner toward him. It would feel like I'm trying to enable him to be less-than-honorable.

[audio]

[armorumvigiles]

I...am unsure as to whether that is the problem at hand, m'lord.

[audio]

[halcyonism]

I believe there are many problems at hand, Captain Basch.... I am quite serious about taking your Guide and selecting your job myself. Unless... this was one you picked willingly?

[ If so, Larsa has been quite wrong about C. Bash of Dalmsga.... ]

[audio]

[armorumvigiles]

Predictably, it was not. I seem to have difficulty navigating the functions of this Guide... perhaps it would be best if I entrusted the task to you next month. If you would, of course.

[audio]

[halcyonism]

I would be glad! More than glad!

[ HE IS SO RIDICULOUSLY SERIOUS THAT IT ISN'T EVEN FUNNY, BASCH. IT ISN'T EVEN FUNNY. ]

Are you sure you're all right with it?

[audio]

[armorumvigiles]

Only if you are fine with taking on such a task, m'lord-- would it not be too cumbersome?

[audio]

[halcyonism]

It won't take that long. Just a few moments.

[ And then they'll find out just how screwed up Basch's Guide really is. ]

Please, worry not about it. It truly is a matter I'm glad to involve myself in.

[audio]

[armorumvigiles]

I trust the task you will appoint me to will not be so difficult.

[Is that a joke? IS IT? Oh Captain, you're so full of surprises.]

[audio]

[halcyonism]

[ SO BASICALLY YOU DON'T WANT TO WORK FOR YOUR MONEY. IS THAT RIGHT? ]

Captain Basch, I have seen from personal experience that you can do almost anything. I would be hard-pressed to select something you would find difficult. Irksome, perhaps, but not difficult.

[audio]

[armorumvigiles]

I can only do that which soldiers are required to do, and that is few and far in between.

[WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, LOOK AT ALL THE INSANE THINGS HE'S ENDURED SINCE HE'S GOTTEN ON THIS SHIP]

But I am finding that this ship requires me to learn many other trades.