It's been to long...
I guess just after my apple laptop was submerged in coffee :( I haven't logged in because I never had a computer to log in too.
I worked pretty hard today and so I decided that all that pain I experience has to be for now, I guess. I am healing and cleaning is important. There seems to be a lot of dust and dirt flying through here. The weather is dictating spring so I guess I thought some window cleaning was important. The birds woke me up singing a cheerful and glad song, the sun is shinning and the snow is melting.
The water is spilling across the driveway, the hay is smelling like it's thawing for the spring. It's an amazing year of weather I have to say.
Avery has been taking it easy with snowboarding, he went at it too hard in the fall and now he's having a hard time keeping interest. He is supposed to attend the whistler mountain this year i don't know if I can afford it yet. I want him to go but it's just when Ethan's 18th birthday is and I wanted to spend more money on that then on Avery. He doesn't have to go this year really?
Ethan is doing amazing, that was the darkest cloud over my head, I fought so long and hard to get through the day with the x giving me so much resistance and obsticles i felt like Ethan was slipping away, fading away, he would sleep for so many hours I would wonder if I didn't come home if he would ever wake up?
We were glad to finally get some help from the hospital, dr. Ensamo was instrumental in helping us get Ethan's B-pap machine and then make sure he was good to use it. It took some time but he was a complete success, we didn't go to many appointments with Joey it was way to time consuming and found it difficult to do all of this, especially when Ethan was concentrating on treatments with the hosptial, we went for a few different tests throughout this year 2014 three for breathing and two for overnight tests. Which the second one was just recent and it was a way better success then the first. The first we stayed together and I think Ethan was upset with me, I was nervous being in the hospital and they gave me the worst bed to sleep on. This time the bed was awesome and Ethan was more relaxed. We both were. We are waiting for the results.
We went to dr. Burrows last week and he is getting tests blood tests from Ethan and that is this week. Ethan has Aish to sign up for and we are getting that underway.
I have a lot of pain in my whole body, it starts in my feet (pads) and shoots up my legs upper back and arms, wrists and fingers. Right shoulder down the front of my arm. Very painful. It was worse two years ago even one, where the legs were in major pain. But that isn't as bad. Though I can't stand for much longer than an hour without having muscle spasms. shooting down my arms. forearms.
I haven't seen or talked to Jordon since last week.
Craig has been staying around. He has been remote for weeks, distant and quiet, he won't discuss anything with me unless it's to do with nothing. I finally asked him yesterday, if he could help keep the dogs from shitting in the deck area. the amound of hair all over the floors and how little messes are everywhere, the garage! He wouldn't look at me or discuss this or talk to me, he'd just walk away, and yesterday he said, "Nothing you say or do is going to make a difference."
I just left it, but this a.m. it was the same, but this time he leaves uma and friends on the deck while he goes out to the front yard with the poddles. so I get up quick before she goes through the windows and let them out. Then I look around and there is hair everywhere.,there is poop on the deck and the dogs are jumping around.
I was so pissed and there was mud up to the kitchen and den. I went at him again, he ignored me again, until he realized that ethan and possibly torren were listening, and I said to both of them when they came up , It's good when your not married cause you don't have to live like this rht rest of your life. just for the time being. Whatever it was that changed him he was trying to really make some difference he called a cleaning company and I got that set up. He said he'd call the furnace guys to come clean it.
We will see.
I worked pretty hard today and so I decided that all that pain I experience has to be for now, I guess. I am healing and cleaning is important. There seems to be a lot of dust and dirt flying through here. The weather is dictating spring so I guess I thought some window cleaning was important. The birds woke me up singing a cheerful and glad song, the sun is shinning and the snow is melting.
The water is spilling across the driveway, the hay is smelling like it's thawing for the spring. It's an amazing year of weather I have to say.
Avery has been taking it easy with snowboarding, he went at it too hard in the fall and now he's having a hard time keeping interest. He is supposed to attend the whistler mountain this year i don't know if I can afford it yet. I want him to go but it's just when Ethan's 18th birthday is and I wanted to spend more money on that then on Avery. He doesn't have to go this year really?
Ethan is doing amazing, that was the darkest cloud over my head, I fought so long and hard to get through the day with the x giving me so much resistance and obsticles i felt like Ethan was slipping away, fading away, he would sleep for so many hours I would wonder if I didn't come home if he would ever wake up?
We were glad to finally get some help from the hospital, dr. Ensamo was instrumental in helping us get Ethan's B-pap machine and then make sure he was good to use it. It took some time but he was a complete success, we didn't go to many appointments with Joey it was way to time consuming and found it difficult to do all of this, especially when Ethan was concentrating on treatments with the hosptial, we went for a few different tests throughout this year 2014 three for breathing and two for overnight tests. Which the second one was just recent and it was a way better success then the first. The first we stayed together and I think Ethan was upset with me, I was nervous being in the hospital and they gave me the worst bed to sleep on. This time the bed was awesome and Ethan was more relaxed. We both were. We are waiting for the results.
We went to dr. Burrows last week and he is getting tests blood tests from Ethan and that is this week. Ethan has Aish to sign up for and we are getting that underway.
I have a lot of pain in my whole body, it starts in my feet (pads) and shoots up my legs upper back and arms, wrists and fingers. Right shoulder down the front of my arm. Very painful. It was worse two years ago even one, where the legs were in major pain. But that isn't as bad. Though I can't stand for much longer than an hour without having muscle spasms. shooting down my arms. forearms.
I haven't seen or talked to Jordon since last week.
Craig has been staying around. He has been remote for weeks, distant and quiet, he won't discuss anything with me unless it's to do with nothing. I finally asked him yesterday, if he could help keep the dogs from shitting in the deck area. the amound of hair all over the floors and how little messes are everywhere, the garage! He wouldn't look at me or discuss this or talk to me, he'd just walk away, and yesterday he said, "Nothing you say or do is going to make a difference."
I just left it, but this a.m. it was the same, but this time he leaves uma and friends on the deck while he goes out to the front yard with the poddles. so I get up quick before she goes through the windows and let them out. Then I look around and there is hair everywhere.,there is poop on the deck and the dogs are jumping around.
I was so pissed and there was mud up to the kitchen and den. I went at him again, he ignored me again, until he realized that ethan and possibly torren were listening, and I said to both of them when they came up , It's good when your not married cause you don't have to live like this rht rest of your life. just for the time being. Whatever it was that changed him he was trying to really make some difference he called a cleaning company and I got that set up. He said he'd call the furnace guys to come clean it.
We will see.