Murderous Corruption, Bribes and Perils
In this issue
Mollari Unmasked
A Centauri Oedipus
Ivanova Bribed
Confessions of a Killer
...and much, much more!
From our correspondent Giselle Burton, with additional reporting by Anella
Murder Most Foul
Na'Toth Assassinated!
As the blood of Na'Toth, former Ambassadorial Aide on Babylon 5, is barely cooling on the hands of londo_mollari, and the rest of the galaxy is standing by in apathy, Galaxy Gab is proud to cry out against this modern Macbeth.
When Ambassador Mollari dissappeared shortly after our magazine had outed his take-over of the station in liason with cold-blooded Minbari Ambassador _delenn, the official explanation of the station's authorities was a kidnapping. Our staff, not fooled by propaganda, smelled a rat almost immediately, and did not cease its attempts to get behind the truth of the so-called abduction, despite police brutality directed at our reporter Giselle Burton.
"You'd think even that dumbass Garibaldi would be able to put two and two together," former security officer Jack Horton told our reporter in his outrage at his former superior's wilful blindness. "Na'Toth takes off to that DS9 place and gets killed there. Mollari is conveniently absent during the entire time and comes back from, guess where, DS9. Well, of course it's just as likely Garibaldi was in Mollari's pockets from the beginning. Why do you think he took off to Minbar in the middle of the investigation?"
As for the victim in this sorry tale, Mollari's sinister motive for organizing Na'Toth's tragic demise became all too apparent when our reporter, in a quest to procure justice for Na'Toth, achieved access to the later's private notes. Apparently Na'Toth was in love with citizengkar, former Ambassador of the Narn. We conjecture affection for this worthy maiden was G'Kar's true motive for the split-up with Mollari. Following her death, however, he once again fell into the hands of the insatiable murderer. We can only imagine how his fellow Narn must feel!
Volunteers for the Put-Mollari-On-Trial campaign may donate their contributions at our website.
Why, Hello, Mrs. Robinson
Timov seduces Vir Cotto
Ambassadorial Aide Vir Cotto obviously found a new ally in his ongoing efforts to succeed his ruthless mentor Londo Mollari. Indeed, Galaxy Gab can report that Vir quite literally filled out Ambassador Mollari's pants when vacationing with the Ambassador's wife, timov_of_algul, on Minbar. "She gushed over him pretty much non-stop," Ranger Adam Pierce, an eye-witness to the May-December affair, commented, before generously adding: "I thought it was sweet. Of course, one wonders how long this has been going on. I mean, those kids she had with her can't have been Mollari's if he's never at home now, can they?"
No longer content with playing the long-suffering spouse through her husband's countless infidelities, Timov appears to have taken the initiative. Shortly after Vir's return to Babylon 5, she was seen being granted an audience by the Regent, a truly rare event these days. Whether or not she was petitioning the Regent for a divorce our sources were unable to verify, but the transfer of considerable sums of money from and to Vir Cotto's accounts in recent weeks indicates someone is preparing their future love nest.
"Timov would never go for a pauper," the Lady Daggair, ex-wife of Mollari, agreed. "Money is about the only thing which gets her hot. That boy has his work cut out for him!"
Voice of No Resistance
Ivanova Bribed With Sex Toy
Feeling undoubtedly neglected after londo_mollari renewed his torrid affair with citizengkar, _delenn turned to the one obstacle to her absolute rule on the station, Commander susanivanova, returned after a brief absence.
We are sorry to report that the Commander was putty in her hands. The method used to bribe Ivanova? The return of her lover taliawinters, spotted entering the Commander's quarters and not leaving until the next morning. Faithful readers may recall that when Ms Winters left the station almost two years ago in somewhat mysterious circumstances, this was justified by the command staff of the station later by accusing her of murder and espionage for the Psi Corps.
Asked why, if this had been true, Ms. Winters was not arrested immediately after her return to the station, the reinstalled security chief, Zack Allen, blustered: "You have no idea what she's been through - and anyway, the Commander wouldn't stand for it!"
We rest our case.
Memoirs of Mayhem
Damar Tells All
"I'll rule as a ghoul," the once and future dictator of Cardassia, Legate_damar, exclaimed with a wolfish smile when giving us an exclusive interview. For hours, our reporter was subjected to a shocking account of crimes and misdemeanours, and only her iron professionalism enabled her to survive without the need for therapy.
The days of his youth in a sect named Eagle Order which apparently closely paralleled the infamous 20th century "Manson Family" gave way to a career in profligacy. "I've enjoyed many relationships with the fairer sex over the years," Damar said, lecherously leering at our reporter, "and I certainly don't object to relationships involving different species."
Indeed, Damar's twin obsessions with sex and bloodshed seem to be at the core of his fall-out with the Dominion, or rather, its representative, Vorta Ambassador Weyoun. "That filthy worm refused to return my interest!" Damar shouted, obviously getting agitated at the memory. "How dare he! He's a clone and not even programmed to such notions!"
Darkly predicting millions more would die before the war with the Dominion was over, Damar dismissed any objections to his ruthless tactics. "Sometimes, innocent lives have to be sacrificed," he declared.
Will he rest in his bloody stride now that Cardassia is his again, or will his allies soon pay the price for trusting him? Only time, and our magazine, will tell.
Following investigations by our reporter Den Randall (see last issue), Galaxy Gab spared neither time nor effort to find out more about the mysterious Scorpius. We proudly present our newest reporter, Anella, our_spring_ice, with an exclusive profile.
Op-Ed
Guest Column
An In-Depth Profile of Scorpius
By: Anella
For galaxygab: An exclusive look at the life of Scorpius.
Background: Lovingly called Scorpy by his closest friends, Scorpius is half-Sebacean and half-Scarran. His unique heritage enables him to read other people's energy signatures, effectively making him a glorified lie detector. It also gives him a distinctive sense of style, characterized by an elaborate protective suit and two cooling rods inserted into his brain. (Close sources report, however, that it would not be surprising if there were rods inserted elsewhere in his anatomy as well given his behaviour.)
Past: Scorpius spent his childhood aboard a Scarran dreadnought. According to Scarran officials, he never truly fit in, always preferring to be alone and play with his Barbie dolls. Therefore, it was not surprising when he eventually escaped and defected to the Peacekeepers.
It was during his stint as a Peacekeeper that he met John Crichton, who would eventually become the object of his sadly unrequited love and obsession. For more than a cycle, he pursued Crichton relentlessly, seeking knowledge about Crichton's secret "wormhole." (This reporter will have to assume this is crude slang commonly used amongst intergalactic travelers.)
Thanks to his immense intellect, Scorpius was able to carry stalking to a new level. In an attempt to track his lust object, Scorpius installed a neurochip in Crichton's brain. According to close confidantes, Scorpius also secretly hoped that having a neural clone of himself living in Crichton's brain would enable Crichton to get to know him better. But alas! It was not to be. The plan backfired badly as Harvey, the neural clone of Scorpius, carried out a torrid affair with Crichton. Needless to say, Scorpius then removed the neurochip and abandoned Harvey in a fit of jealous rage.
Present: Scorpius has finally succeeded in capturing John Crichton and his pregnant lover, Aeryn Sun. Still undeterred, Scorpius continues his pursuit of Crichton, saying that "I think you know by now, John, what I can offer. What we can offer each other." Unless this reporter is mistaken, Scorpius has just confessed to having past dalliances with Crichton! My my. I guess all that stalking had to pay off in one form or another. In addition, it would appear that Scorpius has also developed an affinity for voyeurism, as witnessed by his carefully timed appearance in Crichton and Sun's bedroom.
Future: What does Scorpius' apparent new fetish mean? Could he be angling towards some sort of twisted threesome with John Crichton and Aeryn Sun? Only time will tell!
Fan letters to our new columnist may be addressed here.
Mollari Unmasked
A Centauri Oedipus
Ivanova Bribed
Confessions of a Killer
...and much, much more!
From our correspondent Giselle Burton, with additional reporting by Anella
Murder Most Foul
Na'Toth Assassinated!
As the blood of Na'Toth, former Ambassadorial Aide on Babylon 5, is barely cooling on the hands of londo_mollari, and the rest of the galaxy is standing by in apathy, Galaxy Gab is proud to cry out against this modern Macbeth.
When Ambassador Mollari dissappeared shortly after our magazine had outed his take-over of the station in liason with cold-blooded Minbari Ambassador _delenn, the official explanation of the station's authorities was a kidnapping. Our staff, not fooled by propaganda, smelled a rat almost immediately, and did not cease its attempts to get behind the truth of the so-called abduction, despite police brutality directed at our reporter Giselle Burton.
"You'd think even that dumbass Garibaldi would be able to put two and two together," former security officer Jack Horton told our reporter in his outrage at his former superior's wilful blindness. "Na'Toth takes off to that DS9 place and gets killed there. Mollari is conveniently absent during the entire time and comes back from, guess where, DS9. Well, of course it's just as likely Garibaldi was in Mollari's pockets from the beginning. Why do you think he took off to Minbar in the middle of the investigation?"
As for the victim in this sorry tale, Mollari's sinister motive for organizing Na'Toth's tragic demise became all too apparent when our reporter, in a quest to procure justice for Na'Toth, achieved access to the later's private notes. Apparently Na'Toth was in love with citizengkar, former Ambassador of the Narn. We conjecture affection for this worthy maiden was G'Kar's true motive for the split-up with Mollari. Following her death, however, he once again fell into the hands of the insatiable murderer. We can only imagine how his fellow Narn must feel!
Volunteers for the Put-Mollari-On-Trial campaign may donate their contributions at our website.
Why, Hello, Mrs. Robinson
Timov seduces Vir Cotto
Ambassadorial Aide Vir Cotto obviously found a new ally in his ongoing efforts to succeed his ruthless mentor Londo Mollari. Indeed, Galaxy Gab can report that Vir quite literally filled out Ambassador Mollari's pants when vacationing with the Ambassador's wife, timov_of_algul, on Minbar. "She gushed over him pretty much non-stop," Ranger Adam Pierce, an eye-witness to the May-December affair, commented, before generously adding: "I thought it was sweet. Of course, one wonders how long this has been going on. I mean, those kids she had with her can't have been Mollari's if he's never at home now, can they?"
No longer content with playing the long-suffering spouse through her husband's countless infidelities, Timov appears to have taken the initiative. Shortly after Vir's return to Babylon 5, she was seen being granted an audience by the Regent, a truly rare event these days. Whether or not she was petitioning the Regent for a divorce our sources were unable to verify, but the transfer of considerable sums of money from and to Vir Cotto's accounts in recent weeks indicates someone is preparing their future love nest.
"Timov would never go for a pauper," the Lady Daggair, ex-wife of Mollari, agreed. "Money is about the only thing which gets her hot. That boy has his work cut out for him!"
Voice of No Resistance
Ivanova Bribed With Sex Toy
Feeling undoubtedly neglected after londo_mollari renewed his torrid affair with citizengkar, _delenn turned to the one obstacle to her absolute rule on the station, Commander susanivanova, returned after a brief absence.
We are sorry to report that the Commander was putty in her hands. The method used to bribe Ivanova? The return of her lover taliawinters, spotted entering the Commander's quarters and not leaving until the next morning. Faithful readers may recall that when Ms Winters left the station almost two years ago in somewhat mysterious circumstances, this was justified by the command staff of the station later by accusing her of murder and espionage for the Psi Corps.
Asked why, if this had been true, Ms. Winters was not arrested immediately after her return to the station, the reinstalled security chief, Zack Allen, blustered: "You have no idea what she's been through - and anyway, the Commander wouldn't stand for it!"
We rest our case.
Memoirs of Mayhem
Damar Tells All
"I'll rule as a ghoul," the once and future dictator of Cardassia, Legate_damar, exclaimed with a wolfish smile when giving us an exclusive interview. For hours, our reporter was subjected to a shocking account of crimes and misdemeanours, and only her iron professionalism enabled her to survive without the need for therapy.
The days of his youth in a sect named Eagle Order which apparently closely paralleled the infamous 20th century "Manson Family" gave way to a career in profligacy. "I've enjoyed many relationships with the fairer sex over the years," Damar said, lecherously leering at our reporter, "and I certainly don't object to relationships involving different species."
Indeed, Damar's twin obsessions with sex and bloodshed seem to be at the core of his fall-out with the Dominion, or rather, its representative, Vorta Ambassador Weyoun. "That filthy worm refused to return my interest!" Damar shouted, obviously getting agitated at the memory. "How dare he! He's a clone and not even programmed to such notions!"
Darkly predicting millions more would die before the war with the Dominion was over, Damar dismissed any objections to his ruthless tactics. "Sometimes, innocent lives have to be sacrificed," he declared.
Will he rest in his bloody stride now that Cardassia is his again, or will his allies soon pay the price for trusting him? Only time, and our magazine, will tell.
Following investigations by our reporter Den Randall (see last issue), Galaxy Gab spared neither time nor effort to find out more about the mysterious Scorpius. We proudly present our newest reporter, Anella, our_spring_ice, with an exclusive profile.
Op-Ed
Guest Column
An In-Depth Profile of Scorpius
By: Anella
For galaxygab: An exclusive look at the life of Scorpius.
Background: Lovingly called Scorpy by his closest friends, Scorpius is half-Sebacean and half-Scarran. His unique heritage enables him to read other people's energy signatures, effectively making him a glorified lie detector. It also gives him a distinctive sense of style, characterized by an elaborate protective suit and two cooling rods inserted into his brain. (Close sources report, however, that it would not be surprising if there were rods inserted elsewhere in his anatomy as well given his behaviour.)
Past: Scorpius spent his childhood aboard a Scarran dreadnought. According to Scarran officials, he never truly fit in, always preferring to be alone and play with his Barbie dolls. Therefore, it was not surprising when he eventually escaped and defected to the Peacekeepers.
It was during his stint as a Peacekeeper that he met John Crichton, who would eventually become the object of his sadly unrequited love and obsession. For more than a cycle, he pursued Crichton relentlessly, seeking knowledge about Crichton's secret "wormhole." (This reporter will have to assume this is crude slang commonly used amongst intergalactic travelers.)
Thanks to his immense intellect, Scorpius was able to carry stalking to a new level. In an attempt to track his lust object, Scorpius installed a neurochip in Crichton's brain. According to close confidantes, Scorpius also secretly hoped that having a neural clone of himself living in Crichton's brain would enable Crichton to get to know him better. But alas! It was not to be. The plan backfired badly as Harvey, the neural clone of Scorpius, carried out a torrid affair with Crichton. Needless to say, Scorpius then removed the neurochip and abandoned Harvey in a fit of jealous rage.
Present: Scorpius has finally succeeded in capturing John Crichton and his pregnant lover, Aeryn Sun. Still undeterred, Scorpius continues his pursuit of Crichton, saying that "I think you know by now, John, what I can offer. What we can offer each other." Unless this reporter is mistaken, Scorpius has just confessed to having past dalliances with Crichton! My my. I guess all that stalking had to pay off in one form or another. In addition, it would appear that Scorpius has also developed an affinity for voyeurism, as witnessed by his carefully timed appearance in Crichton and Sun's bedroom.
Future: What does Scorpius' apparent new fetish mean? Could he be angling towards some sort of twisted threesome with John Crichton and Aeryn Sun? Only time will tell!
Fan letters to our new columnist may be addressed here.