Closet Thoughts
Now seems the appropriate time for some general writerly musings. :)
In case you haven't caught on, Closet is a series that is very much dependent on my rewatch of BtVS (and now AtS). It's being written between episodes to insert a non-canon Willow/Cordy relationship into the show. And that makes for some interesting fic-writing because it forces me to deal with the effects of what happens in canon to the Wordy relationship.
Spoilers for future Closet fics under the cut.
For the third story, Soap, I'd originally thought that it would be set during Enemies with Cordy coming across Willow crying in the bathroom. However, when I watched the episodes, I realized that it wouldn't make any sense because we see Cordy lecturing vamp!Willow about boyfriend-stealing a couple episodes down in Doppelgangland.
However, after Doppelgangland, Willow and Cordy are much friendlier to each other in canon. So it gave me an opportunity to insert a scene there.
Likewise with the latest installment, Different. I knew it would be sometime after the whole Oz thing but before Tara enters the scene. And I had planned on it being after Something Blue (but, obviously, before Hush). While rewatching Something Blue, though, I realized that I could easily make Willow's Oz-poutiness encompass her recent rejection by Cordelia, too. Otherwise she'd be too damn cheerful in Hush to have just come back from LA after being pretty thoroughly demoralized by her long-standing crush.
I do have an idea for when the next story will be set, but, of course, I may adjust that when actually watching the episodes.
When I first wrote the first story, calling it "Closet" was just a fun double entendre. They were in a closet. Cordelia had a bit of a freak out after it. It prompted Willow into gay thinking. Yeah, it's an appropriate and fun title.
It's especially happy-making now because of its extra-appropriateness. Obviously, in canon, Cordelia is shown as straight. Willow eventually comes out as a lesbian. This is the makings of a pretty textbook lesbian lover conflict.
And, if you've caught onto the gist of the series, this shouldn't be too spoilery but it's under the cut just in case, this series won't have a happy ending. It's gonna eventually deal with the dark shit of the later seasons (in both shows).
It provides an interesting perspective for looking at canon events. The huge Cordy/Xander/Willow/Oz fallout of S3 which literally ended the Cordy/Willow friendship in the show (Seriously. These girls in the opening episode of S3 were catching up on each other's vacations like old friends). It was nice to be able to address that directly in Soap.
It's also nice to be able to provide a backstory for Willow's coming out. Because we don't really get much of Willow's perspective on that. Hence the complaints that Willow "turned lesbian".
I find people often think that when a woman realizes she's a lesbian, it means any feelings she had for a man at any previous point were fake/invalid/whatever. They think that to call Willow a "lesbian" means to say that she never loved Oz.
But it's not contradictory. Willow could completely love Oz...and still come out as a lesbian a few months later. Sexuality is kinda funny like that. And while it may seem crazy sudden to some viewers, it's a safe bet that Willow had been having inklings of wonderings in the back of her mind for a great deal of her life.
I mean, even her crush on Xander is telling to me. She gets a crush on the safest guy possible. Her best friend. The guy she grew up with. Little socially awkward Willow...of course she's gonna feel an intense attachment to him. And she feels it as a crush. And it externalizes as a crush.
But then there's the feelings she doesn't externalize. The girls she notices or crushes on. And she knows that talking about that stuff would bring up all sorts of issues, so she keeps it to herself. And she finds it's safe to crush on Xander or to respond to Oz's advances or to make advances on Oz, herself, and then she genuinely develops feelings for Oz and loves him and is attached to him and is devastated when he leaves...
And her later coming out as a lesbian doesn't in any way minimize any of that.
And having touched a dick at one point doesn't make her any less of a lesbian.
Hmmm...that was a digression.
Wordy. Yes, Wordy. Inserting a Willow/Cordy relationship into the narrative is my way of exploring Willow's sexuality in a way we never got to see on the show.
Also, it's hot.
For Cordy's part, she has a thing for geeks. :) The first story is very much playing on the Xander/Cordy closet make-outs of S2, and making it so Cordy had a closet make-out with Willow first. So the later Xander/Cordyness could be seen as Cordy longing for what she had with Willow, but expressing it in a slightly more socially acceptable fashion (though, obviously, just dating Xander results in quite a hit to her social status).
By the time of S4, Willow's obviously at a point where she feels more comfortable being open about her sexuality.
Cordelia, however, isn't. She still places great importance on how she is seen by others. And she's a bit homophobic, as a result. And she's ultimately not willing to be open about what she's doing with Willow.
Of course, Willow will soon meet Tara and will find somebody who will be in a visible relationship with her.
That's not the end of Wordy, though. :) I have plans.
And as a sidenote, it's been very entertaining to write a fic from Willow's POV. She's the easiest character for me to write for because my natural voice is typically a cross between Willow and Anya (There's a reason Willow's on all my icons). Very amusing as most of the other fic I've written is Spuffy, and Spike is one of the most difficult POVs for me to write. That's why most of my Spuffy ends up being from Buffy's viewpoint (which is a bit easier for me to get).
In case you haven't caught on, Closet is a series that is very much dependent on my rewatch of BtVS (and now AtS). It's being written between episodes to insert a non-canon Willow/Cordy relationship into the show. And that makes for some interesting fic-writing because it forces me to deal with the effects of what happens in canon to the Wordy relationship.
Spoilers for future Closet fics under the cut.
For the third story, Soap, I'd originally thought that it would be set during Enemies with Cordy coming across Willow crying in the bathroom. However, when I watched the episodes, I realized that it wouldn't make any sense because we see Cordy lecturing vamp!Willow about boyfriend-stealing a couple episodes down in Doppelgangland.
However, after Doppelgangland, Willow and Cordy are much friendlier to each other in canon. So it gave me an opportunity to insert a scene there.
Likewise with the latest installment, Different. I knew it would be sometime after the whole Oz thing but before Tara enters the scene. And I had planned on it being after Something Blue (but, obviously, before Hush). While rewatching Something Blue, though, I realized that I could easily make Willow's Oz-poutiness encompass her recent rejection by Cordelia, too. Otherwise she'd be too damn cheerful in Hush to have just come back from LA after being pretty thoroughly demoralized by her long-standing crush.
I do have an idea for when the next story will be set, but, of course, I may adjust that when actually watching the episodes.
When I first wrote the first story, calling it "Closet" was just a fun double entendre. They were in a closet. Cordelia had a bit of a freak out after it. It prompted Willow into gay thinking. Yeah, it's an appropriate and fun title.
It's especially happy-making now because of its extra-appropriateness. Obviously, in canon, Cordelia is shown as straight. Willow eventually comes out as a lesbian. This is the makings of a pretty textbook lesbian lover conflict.
And, if you've caught onto the gist of the series, this shouldn't be too spoilery but it's under the cut just in case, this series won't have a happy ending. It's gonna eventually deal with the dark shit of the later seasons (in both shows).
It provides an interesting perspective for looking at canon events. The huge Cordy/Xander/Willow/Oz fallout of S3 which literally ended the Cordy/Willow friendship in the show (Seriously. These girls in the opening episode of S3 were catching up on each other's vacations like old friends). It was nice to be able to address that directly in Soap.
It's also nice to be able to provide a backstory for Willow's coming out. Because we don't really get much of Willow's perspective on that. Hence the complaints that Willow "turned lesbian".
I find people often think that when a woman realizes she's a lesbian, it means any feelings she had for a man at any previous point were fake/invalid/whatever. They think that to call Willow a "lesbian" means to say that she never loved Oz.
But it's not contradictory. Willow could completely love Oz...and still come out as a lesbian a few months later. Sexuality is kinda funny like that. And while it may seem crazy sudden to some viewers, it's a safe bet that Willow had been having inklings of wonderings in the back of her mind for a great deal of her life.
I mean, even her crush on Xander is telling to me. She gets a crush on the safest guy possible. Her best friend. The guy she grew up with. Little socially awkward Willow...of course she's gonna feel an intense attachment to him. And she feels it as a crush. And it externalizes as a crush.
But then there's the feelings she doesn't externalize. The girls she notices or crushes on. And she knows that talking about that stuff would bring up all sorts of issues, so she keeps it to herself. And she finds it's safe to crush on Xander or to respond to Oz's advances or to make advances on Oz, herself, and then she genuinely develops feelings for Oz and loves him and is attached to him and is devastated when he leaves...
And her later coming out as a lesbian doesn't in any way minimize any of that.
And having touched a dick at one point doesn't make her any less of a lesbian.
Hmmm...that was a digression.
Wordy. Yes, Wordy. Inserting a Willow/Cordy relationship into the narrative is my way of exploring Willow's sexuality in a way we never got to see on the show.
Also, it's hot.
For Cordy's part, she has a thing for geeks. :) The first story is very much playing on the Xander/Cordy closet make-outs of S2, and making it so Cordy had a closet make-out with Willow first. So the later Xander/Cordyness could be seen as Cordy longing for what she had with Willow, but expressing it in a slightly more socially acceptable fashion (though, obviously, just dating Xander results in quite a hit to her social status).
By the time of S4, Willow's obviously at a point where she feels more comfortable being open about her sexuality.
Cordelia, however, isn't. She still places great importance on how she is seen by others. And she's a bit homophobic, as a result. And she's ultimately not willing to be open about what she's doing with Willow.
Of course, Willow will soon meet Tara and will find somebody who will be in a visible relationship with her.
That's not the end of Wordy, though. :) I have plans.
And as a sidenote, it's been very entertaining to write a fic from Willow's POV. She's the easiest character for me to write for because my natural voice is typically a cross between Willow and Anya (There's a reason Willow's on all my icons). Very amusing as most of the other fic I've written is Spuffy, and Spike is one of the most difficult POVs for me to write. That's why most of my Spuffy ends up being from Buffy's viewpoint (which is a bit easier for me to get).