Emoticonmart.
< originally written Monday, December 24, 2007 >
We live in an "emoticon society"... the smiling idiots who try to sell you crap, the tired vendors who prepare you cheap- yet overpriced- crappy food, the televangelists, the Walmart greeters, the ads on television....
Yesterday I met a guy I can only call Old Crusty. Neil and I were out shopping for the last minute things a holiday dinner assures will bring everyone with disposeable income out to prepare their feast...
...you know, while I'm in this store, let's take a minute to go down this aisle entitled, "the evolution of shopping"...
(listening to Modest Mouse's "Float On") Origins of shopping actually lie in primitive man's desire to hunt- desire being born of the necessity of eating food. That's right ladies- assuming anthropologists are correct about men doing all the hunting- shopping was started by men. Even primitive humans had to eat food, and they went to a hell of a lot of trouble to get it. It's very likely early humans spent most of their lives like the animals- seeking food or avoiding becoming it. Flit on through time and you'll see that while hunting for food became easier for humans- and eventually branched out to every age group once humans built places for other humans to collect their foods- the basic urge has never gone away... mostly because we still eat.
However, the places humans congregate for food began selling more than just food- a few items at first (probably tools for killing game or clothes to cover our relatively furless bodies)- and gradually, the Supercenter came into existence. Of course, there was nothing (except the customers) to check the development of these giants, and eventually they spread to every corner of the "civilized" world.
I could go into my personal opinions of how bloated these dinos have become- full of crappy products that break within two weeks or less- but I'll leave that for the groups that stand outside of them holding petitions to try to halt the growth of another one in their own territory.... I got what I needed, let's get out of this department and go to the checkout counter...
Anyway, I saw Old Crusty here- in the freezer section. It's appropriate I witness someone who now seems so primitive and outdated as him in this area, amongst the artificial tundra. He was using his alter as well- Crusty Hunter- which was incredibly weak of course. It consisted of the dark jacket and typical black cap guys who try to look like "Good Ol' Country Boys" wear. But it was blatantly obvious this wasn't who he really was. I'm not accurately sure what he was, except that he was shriveled... and cautious.
Neil had gotten ahead of me while looking for something, and this man had passed by me on his way down the aisle Neil was in- but in seeing him standing in the middle of the aisle, Old Crusty turned round and continued on... despite having past me to get to that aisle first. Seeing Neil made him edgy- and as I scanned him one time before joining my compatriot, I noticed he was peering over his shoulder at me, and I almost smiled. There was a nervous look on his face.
I later saw Old Crusty in line checking out- I realized he was slightly hunched and as one might expect, didn't speak to the cashier or anyone else, just sort of huddled over his merchandise. Farewell, Crusty Hunter. You shall no doubt die in the same fashion you lived, alone & afraid... wondering if life was only something you dreamed...
< originally written Monday, December 24, 2007 >
We live in an "emoticon society"... the smiling idiots who try to sell you crap, the tired vendors who prepare you cheap- yet overpriced- crappy food, the televangelists, the Walmart greeters, the ads on television....
Yesterday I met a guy I can only call Old Crusty. Neil and I were out shopping for the last minute things a holiday dinner assures will bring everyone with disposeable income out to prepare their feast...
...you know, while I'm in this store, let's take a minute to go down this aisle entitled, "the evolution of shopping"...
(listening to Modest Mouse's "Float On") Origins of shopping actually lie in primitive man's desire to hunt- desire being born of the necessity of eating food. That's right ladies- assuming anthropologists are correct about men doing all the hunting- shopping was started by men. Even primitive humans had to eat food, and they went to a hell of a lot of trouble to get it. It's very likely early humans spent most of their lives like the animals- seeking food or avoiding becoming it. Flit on through time and you'll see that while hunting for food became easier for humans- and eventually branched out to every age group once humans built places for other humans to collect their foods- the basic urge has never gone away... mostly because we still eat.
However, the places humans congregate for food began selling more than just food- a few items at first (probably tools for killing game or clothes to cover our relatively furless bodies)- and gradually, the Supercenter came into existence. Of course, there was nothing (except the customers) to check the development of these giants, and eventually they spread to every corner of the "civilized" world.
I could go into my personal opinions of how bloated these dinos have become- full of crappy products that break within two weeks or less- but I'll leave that for the groups that stand outside of them holding petitions to try to halt the growth of another one in their own territory.... I got what I needed, let's get out of this department and go to the checkout counter...
Anyway, I saw Old Crusty here- in the freezer section. It's appropriate I witness someone who now seems so primitive and outdated as him in this area, amongst the artificial tundra. He was using his alter as well- Crusty Hunter- which was incredibly weak of course. It consisted of the dark jacket and typical black cap guys who try to look like "Good Ol' Country Boys" wear. But it was blatantly obvious this wasn't who he really was. I'm not accurately sure what he was, except that he was shriveled... and cautious.
Neil had gotten ahead of me while looking for something, and this man had passed by me on his way down the aisle Neil was in- but in seeing him standing in the middle of the aisle, Old Crusty turned round and continued on... despite having past me to get to that aisle first. Seeing Neil made him edgy- and as I scanned him one time before joining my compatriot, I noticed he was peering over his shoulder at me, and I almost smiled. There was a nervous look on his face.
I later saw Old Crusty in line checking out- I realized he was slightly hunched and as one might expect, didn't speak to the cashier or anyone else, just sort of huddled over his merchandise. Farewell, Crusty Hunter. You shall no doubt die in the same fashion you lived, alone & afraid... wondering if life was only something you dreamed...
< originally written Monday, December 24, 2007 >