This fire is out of control...I'm going to burn this city
Since I don't have access to the internet as much as I would like, I started writing in a journal at home. I was going to write some of the entries here but I won't do that today. I've decided to be KIND today...fucking hate that word. I just want to rebel against that word. I have so much anger and bitterness inside of me that I'm afraid its just going to spew forth in a bunch of word vomit all over some helpless sap who has no other choice than to work/shop at wally mart because of the low income wage they pay their fucking employees...oops...guess I am not so KIND after all.
On a positive note...hmph...I've been getting my shit together here in Pa. I am making plans with family for the summer. I'm looking forward to seeing the ocean again after being apart from it for so long. I hope I make some new friends soon at wal-mart because I don't think Tonya will want to go to the shore after moving to Ohio in May. My cousin doesn't like swimming so much so he's out..don't really want to go with my parents but we all must make sacrifices to our large egos...*laughs grimmly*. I'm pretty sick of working for an enterprise who hates everything I believe in, so I'm going to try and better myself so I can get out of the labor force. I bought a grammar book in order to work on my speaking skills along with my writing skills. My mom has it ingrained in my brain that I don't belong in the professional world cause of how I look and act. Well we all can change can't we? Just someone please save me before I turn into the rest of yuppies out there.
"If I needed someone to control me
If I needed someone to push me around
I would change my direction before I... Drown" -- Three Days Grace (Drown)
I've decided to work on my car a little bit as well. I'm tired of being ignorant when it comes to cars, so I'm going to buy the car manual at NAPA and read up on it after I finish with my grammar book. I was going to take my car to circuit city to fix my back speakers, but he said its a waste of money and its very simple to look at. I figure with all this free time on my hands, might as well do some of things I've been wanting to do. Have to use this time to fix myself, but I never thought that anything was broken...*sighs*.
"Now it seems im fading
All my dreams are not worth saving
I've done my share of waiting
And I've still got nowhere left to go" -- Three Days Grace (Take Me Under)
There is alot of good news going around me. Tonya is going to Kent State University which is where Drew Carey went. She didn't get the assistantship but everything else is working out for her. Even the job placement is great with their linguistics program. My friend Kevin is going to propose to his girlfriend in either Ireland (she's there right now for a co-op) or in Paris, France. If she says no, I'm going to beat her ass...*laughs*. My mom and Jeff are going to get married in the summer time, just need to pick the place. She wants to get married before the justice of the peace and he wants to get married in Las Vegas. Its hard to be so miserable when there's so much good cheer going on all around me..I wish everyone the best of the best but at the same time I'm jealous of their good fortune. Its easier for me to be by myself curled up with a good book of Stephen King awesomeness than to be with my happy friends and family, so I am forcing myself to hang out with them because I know its healing me more than Stephen King ever could.
Anyways...I'll try and update more since my schedule is going to be less hectic.
"Find me and follow me
through corridors, refectories and files
you must follow, leave
this academic factory.." -- Franz Ferdinand (The Dark of The Matinee)
On a positive note...hmph...I've been getting my shit together here in Pa. I am making plans with family for the summer. I'm looking forward to seeing the ocean again after being apart from it for so long. I hope I make some new friends soon at wal-mart because I don't think Tonya will want to go to the shore after moving to Ohio in May. My cousin doesn't like swimming so much so he's out..don't really want to go with my parents but we all must make sacrifices to our large egos...*laughs grimmly*. I'm pretty sick of working for an enterprise who hates everything I believe in, so I'm going to try and better myself so I can get out of the labor force. I bought a grammar book in order to work on my speaking skills along with my writing skills. My mom has it ingrained in my brain that I don't belong in the professional world cause of how I look and act. Well we all can change can't we? Just someone please save me before I turn into the rest of yuppies out there.
"If I needed someone to control me
If I needed someone to push me around
I would change my direction before I... Drown" -- Three Days Grace (Drown)
I've decided to work on my car a little bit as well. I'm tired of being ignorant when it comes to cars, so I'm going to buy the car manual at NAPA and read up on it after I finish with my grammar book. I was going to take my car to circuit city to fix my back speakers, but he said its a waste of money and its very simple to look at. I figure with all this free time on my hands, might as well do some of things I've been wanting to do. Have to use this time to fix myself, but I never thought that anything was broken...*sighs*.
"Now it seems im fading
All my dreams are not worth saving
I've done my share of waiting
And I've still got nowhere left to go" -- Three Days Grace (Take Me Under)
There is alot of good news going around me. Tonya is going to Kent State University which is where Drew Carey went. She didn't get the assistantship but everything else is working out for her. Even the job placement is great with their linguistics program. My friend Kevin is going to propose to his girlfriend in either Ireland (she's there right now for a co-op) or in Paris, France. If she says no, I'm going to beat her ass...*laughs*. My mom and Jeff are going to get married in the summer time, just need to pick the place. She wants to get married before the justice of the peace and he wants to get married in Las Vegas. Its hard to be so miserable when there's so much good cheer going on all around me..I wish everyone the best of the best but at the same time I'm jealous of their good fortune. Its easier for me to be by myself curled up with a good book of Stephen King awesomeness than to be with my happy friends and family, so I am forcing myself to hang out with them because I know its healing me more than Stephen King ever could.
Anyways...I'll try and update more since my schedule is going to be less hectic.
"Find me and follow me
through corridors, refectories and files
you must follow, leave
this academic factory.." -- Franz Ferdinand (The Dark of The Matinee)