On this day, last year:

[fuzzigigi]

"She needed a lover and at the same time a lover was not what she needed. The need of a lover was, after all, quite a secondary thing. She needed to be loved, to be long and quietly and patiently loved. To be sure she is a grotesque, but then all the people in the world are grotesques. We all need to be loved. What would cure her would cure the rest of us also. The disease she has is, you see, universal. We all want to be loved and the world has no plan for creating our lovers."

-from "Seeds" by Sherwood Anderson
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I want Jay, but am also glad he's two hours away.
I want to nurse the receivers of bad news with cakes and alcohol, but must wait for the money.
I want a sign: something profound and shiny, preferably.