please don't pick the flowers
21 grams…hmm…how should I go on? With what words could I use to explain the feeling I had walking out of the theatre w/ reece?…we both just strolled our way out into the open air, speachless…there was something beautiful we had both just learned, yet we had known it all along…21 grams…I don’t know how to go on…honestly, I don’t know much about anything…I get a faint sense of the world by just sreaming ‘you don’t understand!!!’…no one understands…and yet in the most childish and simplistic way, they do….21 grams equals the weight of ‘5 nickels, a hummingbird, and a bar of chocolate’…21 grams can weigh anything to the liking…anything until our own drifts up into the air w/out fighting gravity…w/out looking back on our flesh and bones in envy…
the meaning is lost…when the solution is spread….like a story sent down a line of people…finally resting on at the ear of a careless boy who wanted to find god…love…hope…reason…logic…whatever he could muster out of himself…sucked up philosophies and meandering pride…the road never ends if you start looking at a map…
another part of the movie that struck me was a scene where sean penn asked his girl if she really loved him…or if she was just lonely…how many times that thought has humiliated me…or even better, how many times it’s given me hope
(written awhile ago…)
Ease your mind…gems and gravy w/ a touch of elbow grease to hold it all together…your mind…I wonder about endlessly, more or less, till nothing matters…everything…and I say ‘wonder’ w/ the most specific, tangible, and credible life I live within…these eyes are tired and losing their lust…or what some refer to as impatience.…matter controlling time…and the rest is a mystery I have to solve…dissolve…just trick it into a ‘sure thing’ while all the odds are balancing themselves out…your mind…the surest thing sense’ the first days of greed…your mind is never going away…and I try and fight it…I really do…make it more than nothing….first guessing…second guessing…forever and ever I’ll make it my life to understand the philosophy of chess…the stock pages…property investments and selfless indulgence through a common lack of patronage for the common man….twisted, ironic troublings I get these days…making themselves in and out of the question….here again…the second guessings…
Thr trouble is I don’t how to play if off cool and omniscient…jousting to each opened gate w/ an answer beside a slap to the self-conscious…I want nothing more or less, without matter of popular opinion, or a swaying left jab to blow out their culture, than to live in peace…harmony… double dosed benediction….a cardboard picture of a life I will never see…a song that rarely shares my gravity…our minds…are troubled…by each other…and one’another…sister or brother…gravity of our equal right…make us lovers!
But I’m not ready…I keep saying it…over and over like a woman’s description of a confession or obsession…like a paranoid schiz checking the rear view mirror…or a shy boy who always seems to fear her…dawn of dusk…I imagine…it…
(already two ‘its’ I can recall but I’m going through w/ a withdrawal…so don’t go mental when I mention nothing in an interview about my childhood…)
“its honestly not very well orrganized in there is it david?”
…I look at the floor and spot a crack…steadily, me eyes wondered off into a hole that could have went up to the sky if you had looked at it right…the answers were multiplying w/ substance…reason…daily examples of love…reasons to go on….as if we couldn’t have thought of anything better…
Call us if you don’t agree…we can talk about sports or how ja rule isn’t anything but a camera hoggiing loser…tied up in his own lies….ah, the life of ‘success’…
‘if only I could be famous and have my whole life blasted on the airwaves…at the moment it would look like a good selfless scam…I’d be gutting myself for the pleasure of not harming anyone else’s worthwhile leisure …but I just know I could help….if just a little…
help!
…getting caught up into car jams and long lines at the bank…having to face the reality your husband is crazy to the more certain extent…long lines and short turns here and there…if anything…confusing…like a deck of 51 cards and a pretty girl missing her front teeth…
but watch while I pucker up and play solitaire w/ a piece of paper representing the ace of hearts…
I’m somewhat, basically, trying hard…
As least finish as many starts
the meaning is lost…when the solution is spread….like a story sent down a line of people…finally resting on at the ear of a careless boy who wanted to find god…love…hope…reason…logic…whatever he could muster out of himself…sucked up philosophies and meandering pride…the road never ends if you start looking at a map…
another part of the movie that struck me was a scene where sean penn asked his girl if she really loved him…or if she was just lonely…how many times that thought has humiliated me…or even better, how many times it’s given me hope
(written awhile ago…)
Ease your mind…gems and gravy w/ a touch of elbow grease to hold it all together…your mind…I wonder about endlessly, more or less, till nothing matters…everything…and I say ‘wonder’ w/ the most specific, tangible, and credible life I live within…these eyes are tired and losing their lust…or what some refer to as impatience.…matter controlling time…and the rest is a mystery I have to solve…dissolve…just trick it into a ‘sure thing’ while all the odds are balancing themselves out…your mind…the surest thing sense’ the first days of greed…your mind is never going away…and I try and fight it…I really do…make it more than nothing….first guessing…second guessing…forever and ever I’ll make it my life to understand the philosophy of chess…the stock pages…property investments and selfless indulgence through a common lack of patronage for the common man….twisted, ironic troublings I get these days…making themselves in and out of the question….here again…the second guessings…
Thr trouble is I don’t how to play if off cool and omniscient…jousting to each opened gate w/ an answer beside a slap to the self-conscious…I want nothing more or less, without matter of popular opinion, or a swaying left jab to blow out their culture, than to live in peace…harmony… double dosed benediction….a cardboard picture of a life I will never see…a song that rarely shares my gravity…our minds…are troubled…by each other…and one’another…sister or brother…gravity of our equal right…make us lovers!
But I’m not ready…I keep saying it…over and over like a woman’s description of a confession or obsession…like a paranoid schiz checking the rear view mirror…or a shy boy who always seems to fear her…dawn of dusk…I imagine…it…
(already two ‘its’ I can recall but I’m going through w/ a withdrawal…so don’t go mental when I mention nothing in an interview about my childhood…)
“its honestly not very well orrganized in there is it david?”
…I look at the floor and spot a crack…steadily, me eyes wondered off into a hole that could have went up to the sky if you had looked at it right…the answers were multiplying w/ substance…reason…daily examples of love…reasons to go on….as if we couldn’t have thought of anything better…
Call us if you don’t agree…we can talk about sports or how ja rule isn’t anything but a camera hoggiing loser…tied up in his own lies….ah, the life of ‘success’…
‘if only I could be famous and have my whole life blasted on the airwaves…at the moment it would look like a good selfless scam…I’d be gutting myself for the pleasure of not harming anyone else’s worthwhile leisure …but I just know I could help….if just a little…
help!
…getting caught up into car jams and long lines at the bank…having to face the reality your husband is crazy to the more certain extent…long lines and short turns here and there…if anything…confusing…like a deck of 51 cards and a pretty girl missing her front teeth…
but watch while I pucker up and play solitaire w/ a piece of paper representing the ace of hearts…
I’m somewhat, basically, trying hard…
As least finish as many starts