2012 in less than 20 hours
So yeah... the FINAL post for the year 2011. A quick one, cause well, I'm using my cellphone to generate the internet. My net went down AGAIN after Christmas so I've been off the internet (and social sites) since then. I need to file another complaint to my internet provider T.T
Anyway, before I leave, I'd like to share some of my accomplishments and resolution for next year.
Accomplishment huh? Well... 2011 has been a mellow and dark year for me. A very NEGATIVE & EMO year. So, compared to my previous years, it's been filled with emotional and psychological issues. Nope, I haven't gone crazy... just completely lost faith in other human being, specifically those around me who called me 'family' and 'friends'. I quit my job on February, to help some of my close acquaintances, and well, I've never heard of them again until now. I wanted to go to Japan to watch the Budoukan, but family issue forced me to sacrifice my monetary depost, and well... kinda dragged me into it as well now. I guess this is what I get from caring about others too much, when they didn't even care about your. Disappointment took the toll on me, and I practically turned 'evil' as the first digit of my age changed. Yeah, that sum it all.
But then again, I had some of dreams fulfilled this year:
1. I had a very touching unexpected Christmas Present (from Jerry - and I kept smiling thinking of that), which I haven't had for such a loooooooooong time. I even forgotten when was the last time I even had one o_O. My Aunty gave me one as well. No sign from those people whom I always remembered on their birthday and Christmas though (they didn't even send their wishes).
2. I managed to get busy with singing thanks to Youtube, and though not a professional recording, I had a blast with my works. Listening to my own voice in the songs that I favorited, is a bliss hahaha (Even when it could've been better).
3. Another dream fulfilled, is that I got to work with several talents of THE WORLD (yup, not local partnership, but global) for the Xmas song. I've been wanting this since long a go, and hey! Technology (Youtube and emails) allowed me to do so! WOW!
4. Oh yeah, finally able to visit my family in Malaysia, and boy... it was a feast they held for us XD... look forward to visit them again soon, had to save up though hahaha. And I suck at their food, the biggest thing I desire when I was there was home food hahaha
5. Finally, after all these years of struggling to reach my desire weight, I finally reach it. I was almost 94kg before I graduated college. After that I trained and I turned 77kg when I went to the gym, and stay in that spot until last year. I bulk up into 81kg when I visit my family in Malay earlier this year, and well, now I'm 72kg as I've always wanted! Hahahaha... Still had to work on fat on several areas, cause I actually gain 2kg back (yes, I was already 70 kg earlier this month) during this holiday thanks to cakes and lots of food T.T, and I'm practically annoyed with my family who said I'm too skinny while several months ago they said I'm too chubby -_- (they definitely need to re-play their own previous statement before hitting me with another one),
There you go, eventhough I'm now jobless and emotionally drained, God actually remembered me and fulfilled some of my dreams. My resolution for 2012? Come what may hahaha... probably pursuing my dreams to get bigger and bigger. Get a girlfriend? Well people have been saying that I'm not 'normal' since I haven't had one for years (my working cousin even hooked up with a highschool fresh(wo)men... yeesssh T.T), but I really need to work on that 'disappoinment' and 'trust' issue first. I don't really mind being single for the rest of my life as well hahahaha (it's FUN!), I do want children though XD. So yeah, come whay may 2012! I'll be there for you! The year couldn't be more DARKer, GLOOMier and EMOer like this one right? hahaha
The past me: "I care for you, I'd do everything for you, even when you never cared for me"
The now me: "You care for me, then I care for you... but nope, I won't do EVERYthing for you"
I've learn about that in the hard way, and kept falling these lessons of life, but now I'm really getting used to with that last idealism, so expect the same from me in 2012...
I'll be off the internet again after this, probably till middle of January. Continuing my solitude vacation... hey, I beat up Tekken 6 and finished Assasin's Creed II last night, and I still have other games I need to finish hahaha. So, see you next year, if Heaven's permit! Bye now!!
And here's my last song on Youtube for the year 2011. New songs coming up in 2012 hahahaha
http://youtu.be/L4FD129tsM8
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2012 everyone!!!
Kick start the new year with a blast okay!!!
Anyway, before I leave, I'd like to share some of my accomplishments and resolution for next year.
Accomplishment huh? Well... 2011 has been a mellow and dark year for me. A very NEGATIVE & EMO year. So, compared to my previous years, it's been filled with emotional and psychological issues. Nope, I haven't gone crazy... just completely lost faith in other human being, specifically those around me who called me 'family' and 'friends'. I quit my job on February, to help some of my close acquaintances, and well, I've never heard of them again until now. I wanted to go to Japan to watch the Budoukan, but family issue forced me to sacrifice my monetary depost, and well... kinda dragged me into it as well now. I guess this is what I get from caring about others too much, when they didn't even care about your. Disappointment took the toll on me, and I practically turned 'evil' as the first digit of my age changed. Yeah, that sum it all.
But then again, I had some of dreams fulfilled this year:
1. I had a very touching unexpected Christmas Present (from Jerry - and I kept smiling thinking of that), which I haven't had for such a loooooooooong time. I even forgotten when was the last time I even had one o_O. My Aunty gave me one as well. No sign from those people whom I always remembered on their birthday and Christmas though (they didn't even send their wishes).
2. I managed to get busy with singing thanks to Youtube, and though not a professional recording, I had a blast with my works. Listening to my own voice in the songs that I favorited, is a bliss hahaha (Even when it could've been better).
3. Another dream fulfilled, is that I got to work with several talents of THE WORLD (yup, not local partnership, but global) for the Xmas song. I've been wanting this since long a go, and hey! Technology (Youtube and emails) allowed me to do so! WOW!
4. Oh yeah, finally able to visit my family in Malaysia, and boy... it was a feast they held for us XD... look forward to visit them again soon, had to save up though hahaha. And I suck at their food, the biggest thing I desire when I was there was home food hahaha
5. Finally, after all these years of struggling to reach my desire weight, I finally reach it. I was almost 94kg before I graduated college. After that I trained and I turned 77kg when I went to the gym, and stay in that spot until last year. I bulk up into 81kg when I visit my family in Malay earlier this year, and well, now I'm 72kg as I've always wanted! Hahahaha... Still had to work on fat on several areas, cause I actually gain 2kg back (yes, I was already 70 kg earlier this month) during this holiday thanks to cakes and lots of food T.T, and I'm practically annoyed with my family who said I'm too skinny while several months ago they said I'm too chubby -_- (they definitely need to re-play their own previous statement before hitting me with another one),
There you go, eventhough I'm now jobless and emotionally drained, God actually remembered me and fulfilled some of my dreams. My resolution for 2012? Come what may hahaha... probably pursuing my dreams to get bigger and bigger. Get a girlfriend? Well people have been saying that I'm not 'normal' since I haven't had one for years (my working cousin even hooked up with a highschool fresh(wo)men... yeesssh T.T), but I really need to work on that 'disappoinment' and 'trust' issue first. I don't really mind being single for the rest of my life as well hahahaha (it's FUN!), I do want children though XD. So yeah, come whay may 2012! I'll be there for you! The year couldn't be more DARKer, GLOOMier and EMOer like this one right? hahaha
The past me: "I care for you, I'd do everything for you, even when you never cared for me"
The now me: "You care for me, then I care for you... but nope, I won't do EVERYthing for you"
I've learn about that in the hard way, and kept falling these lessons of life, but now I'm really getting used to with that last idealism, so expect the same from me in 2012...
I'll be off the internet again after this, probably till middle of January. Continuing my solitude vacation... hey, I beat up Tekken 6 and finished Assasin's Creed II last night, and I still have other games I need to finish hahaha. So, see you next year, if Heaven's permit! Bye now!!
And here's my last song on Youtube for the year 2011. New songs coming up in 2012 hahahaha
http://youtu.be/L4FD129tsM8
Click to viewHAPPY NEW YEAR 2012 everyone!!!
Kick start the new year with a blast okay!!!