Movie Reviews.
There's three movie reviews to talk about here so I guess I'll just go in order from worst to best.
King Arthur-
Boy am I glad that I decided against paying 6 dollars to see this piece of crap in theatres. I'm even glad that I didn't pay attention to the ads when they said that it had come out on video and was available for rental. I got to see this one on the plane from Baltimore to San Fransisco. Honestly, why do they always pick really bad movies and torture us for part of the plane ride? The damn thing's too distracting and you can't sleep in economy seating. People always ask you to push your seat back up just when you get it into a comfortable position. I mean, they were made to recline, deal with it! Anyway, about the movie: it's definately not worth renting for any of you who were still contemplating it.
We should all know that there are multiple versions of the King Arthur tale. We all know the most popular one, or at least the Universal Studios version: King Arthur releases Excalibur from the stone when he is a young boy and from that day is pronounced the King of Camelot. He, along with his advisor Merlin and the Knights of the Round table, manage to protect Camelot and its people from numerous threats, blah, blah, blah. This version seems like they made it up themselves. They only reference certain people (Gweneveree or however it's spelled, the Knights, Merlin, and Arthur himself) and a single place (Camelot) that can be accounted for in the other versions. Everything else is totally new.
Here's the synapsis-
There's this battle between the Romans (yes, they're bent on world domination in this story as well) and this tribe of people from this place that they call "North of the Wall" (a wall is constructed dividing Southern Europe from Northern Europe). Only a few of the tribe is left by the end of the battle, but the Romans have lost many men as well. The tribesmen surrender and in exchange for their lives and the lives of their families they have to serve the Romans in their conquest. These people send their strongest sons, within the ages of about 13 or so, to go train and fight for the Romans. These boys are later refered to as Arthur's Knights or the ever popular Knights of the Round Table. They have to serve Rome for 15 years and then they are granted their freedom
The Knights of this generation are just about to recieve their freedom when they are given one last mission. They must travel deep behind enemy lines so that they can rescue this Roman family living there before they're all killed by what are supposed to be the entire northern army (they don't distinguish between countries because none had really been established at that point in time). Against their true will they realize that if they do not do this task they will be charged with treason or some such thing; so they accept. They go against incredible odds and come out victorious (by the way; while in the outcroping where the Roman family was living they meet up with Gweneveree, played by Kiera Knightly). Long story short, they make it back with most of the family still alive, Merlin as an ally, the entire northern army defeated, and their freedom. Perfect ending to a terrible movie. I don't know whether Arthur had a wife named Gweneveree but I know damn well that she wasn't an Amazon archer who was under the command of Merlin.
From a performance standpoint the acting sucked. The only person who was really worth paying attention to was Kiera and that's just because she's Kiera. Even she could have done a little bit better. Everyone else was just terrible. Script was terrible, portrayal was terrible, drama was terrible, the whole thing was terrible. Oh, and another thing, since when is Camelot in England? I always thought that it was supposed to be in Babylonia. Is that just me or am I right?
Anyway, I know that I implied that I would do all three of the movie reviews here but I've lost motivation to do the other two right now. I'll finish them later. Here's what you have to look forward to: I Robot and Pay It Forward. Keep on reading them; Pay It Forward is going to be a real treat.
King Arthur-
Boy am I glad that I decided against paying 6 dollars to see this piece of crap in theatres. I'm even glad that I didn't pay attention to the ads when they said that it had come out on video and was available for rental. I got to see this one on the plane from Baltimore to San Fransisco. Honestly, why do they always pick really bad movies and torture us for part of the plane ride? The damn thing's too distracting and you can't sleep in economy seating. People always ask you to push your seat back up just when you get it into a comfortable position. I mean, they were made to recline, deal with it! Anyway, about the movie: it's definately not worth renting for any of you who were still contemplating it.
We should all know that there are multiple versions of the King Arthur tale. We all know the most popular one, or at least the Universal Studios version: King Arthur releases Excalibur from the stone when he is a young boy and from that day is pronounced the King of Camelot. He, along with his advisor Merlin and the Knights of the Round table, manage to protect Camelot and its people from numerous threats, blah, blah, blah. This version seems like they made it up themselves. They only reference certain people (Gweneveree or however it's spelled, the Knights, Merlin, and Arthur himself) and a single place (Camelot) that can be accounted for in the other versions. Everything else is totally new.
Here's the synapsis-
There's this battle between the Romans (yes, they're bent on world domination in this story as well) and this tribe of people from this place that they call "North of the Wall" (a wall is constructed dividing Southern Europe from Northern Europe). Only a few of the tribe is left by the end of the battle, but the Romans have lost many men as well. The tribesmen surrender and in exchange for their lives and the lives of their families they have to serve the Romans in their conquest. These people send their strongest sons, within the ages of about 13 or so, to go train and fight for the Romans. These boys are later refered to as Arthur's Knights or the ever popular Knights of the Round Table. They have to serve Rome for 15 years and then they are granted their freedom
The Knights of this generation are just about to recieve their freedom when they are given one last mission. They must travel deep behind enemy lines so that they can rescue this Roman family living there before they're all killed by what are supposed to be the entire northern army (they don't distinguish between countries because none had really been established at that point in time). Against their true will they realize that if they do not do this task they will be charged with treason or some such thing; so they accept. They go against incredible odds and come out victorious (by the way; while in the outcroping where the Roman family was living they meet up with Gweneveree, played by Kiera Knightly). Long story short, they make it back with most of the family still alive, Merlin as an ally, the entire northern army defeated, and their freedom. Perfect ending to a terrible movie. I don't know whether Arthur had a wife named Gweneveree but I know damn well that she wasn't an Amazon archer who was under the command of Merlin.
From a performance standpoint the acting sucked. The only person who was really worth paying attention to was Kiera and that's just because she's Kiera. Even she could have done a little bit better. Everyone else was just terrible. Script was terrible, portrayal was terrible, drama was terrible, the whole thing was terrible. Oh, and another thing, since when is Camelot in England? I always thought that it was supposed to be in Babylonia. Is that just me or am I right?
Anyway, I know that I implied that I would do all three of the movie reviews here but I've lost motivation to do the other two right now. I'll finish them later. Here's what you have to look forward to: I Robot and Pay It Forward. Keep on reading them; Pay It Forward is going to be a real treat.