Edit Me... For the Good of the World!
There's a job I'm trying to get. It's a desk job, it involves writing, it's many things that I'm looking for.
It's also the first time I've ever had to submit a writing sample.
So I wrote a little something, a review of the movie Brick. And I want this thing to be good. I know that there are many, many writers amongst my friends here, so I'm reaching out to you guys. If you could find it in your heart, please just take a quick look at this. Give it a once over. See if there are any glaring mistakes, punctuational flubs, grammatical errors. And if there are, just point them out in a reply.
Thank you for your help.
In Brick Rian Johnson has crafted a film that is the perfect blending of two American cinematic standards; the high school coming of age tale and the dark, labyrinthine detective thriller. Or, more accurately, Johnson has taken a labyrinthine detective thriller and set it in a modern West Coast American high school.
The detective in this particular tale is Brendan (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), a high school student trying to cope with the heartache he feels after his girlfriend unexpectedly breaks up with him. And just like the classic private eye stereotype, Brendan is jaded, too smart for his own good, and has no illusions of innocence for the world around him. He spends his days at school living in self-imposed exile, disdaining the other students and faculty. He ducks his head as he walks through the halls, eats his lunch behind the school, hiding away from everyone but his only friend, the nerdy Brain. It's a phone call from his ex-girlfriend, her voice broken by fright and desperation, that sends Brendan deep into the twisted social circles of his high school to untangle a web of deceit and manipulation. A web that weaves together the kids from the coolest of the cool kids, a couple of violent thugs, and a bizarre drug dealer, revealing underneath it all a brutal murder.
Brendan is a classic neurotic outsider, choosing to live beyond the walls of society, partly because of a deep-seated need to rebel and partly for fear of actually connecting with other people. In Brendan you can see exactly where the road forked and led to both the early twentieth century private eye characters like Philip Marlowe and the rebellious geek that is Duckie from Sixteen Candles. Gordon-Levitt's portrayal of Brendan, a kid with deep reserves of determination and uncanny perception, and his unwavering commitment to the reality of his character that makes this movie work. Gordon-Levitt shows us the growing fractures in Brendan as he becomes exhausted and beaten, often very literally, in his dogged pursuit of the truth.
A detective isn't much of anything without suspects and witnesses to question, and the collection of strange characters in Brick doesn't disappoint. The alluring rich girl Laura, the wicked sex pot Kara, the street punk Dode, the brutal enforcer Tug. They all add intriguing angles for Brendan to stumble his way through. And to top it all off you get a brilliant bit of casting in Richard Roundtree as Vice-Principal Trueman, a Lt. Bressler to Brendan's "Dirty" Harry.
Johnson's first foray behind the lens of a camera belies a natural talent. Here and there you can see the dream-like qualities of David Lynch's work, or the stylish and brutal action of Sam Peckinpah. What may leave the deepest impression though is Johnson's use of language. Employing a completely artificial set of slang and jargon, the characters' lines are a blend of detective novel innovators like Chandler and Hammett and the sarcasm and self-awareness of Joss Whedon's Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The lines seem as if they were written in a secret code, enticing you with their strangeness and cadence, rewarding repeated viewings with deeper meaning.
It's also the first time I've ever had to submit a writing sample.
So I wrote a little something, a review of the movie Brick. And I want this thing to be good. I know that there are many, many writers amongst my friends here, so I'm reaching out to you guys. If you could find it in your heart, please just take a quick look at this. Give it a once over. See if there are any glaring mistakes, punctuational flubs, grammatical errors. And if there are, just point them out in a reply.
Thank you for your help.
In Brick Rian Johnson has crafted a film that is the perfect blending of two American cinematic standards; the high school coming of age tale and the dark, labyrinthine detective thriller. Or, more accurately, Johnson has taken a labyrinthine detective thriller and set it in a modern West Coast American high school.
The detective in this particular tale is Brendan (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), a high school student trying to cope with the heartache he feels after his girlfriend unexpectedly breaks up with him. And just like the classic private eye stereotype, Brendan is jaded, too smart for his own good, and has no illusions of innocence for the world around him. He spends his days at school living in self-imposed exile, disdaining the other students and faculty. He ducks his head as he walks through the halls, eats his lunch behind the school, hiding away from everyone but his only friend, the nerdy Brain. It's a phone call from his ex-girlfriend, her voice broken by fright and desperation, that sends Brendan deep into the twisted social circles of his high school to untangle a web of deceit and manipulation. A web that weaves together the kids from the coolest of the cool kids, a couple of violent thugs, and a bizarre drug dealer, revealing underneath it all a brutal murder.
Brendan is a classic neurotic outsider, choosing to live beyond the walls of society, partly because of a deep-seated need to rebel and partly for fear of actually connecting with other people. In Brendan you can see exactly where the road forked and led to both the early twentieth century private eye characters like Philip Marlowe and the rebellious geek that is Duckie from Sixteen Candles. Gordon-Levitt's portrayal of Brendan, a kid with deep reserves of determination and uncanny perception, and his unwavering commitment to the reality of his character that makes this movie work. Gordon-Levitt shows us the growing fractures in Brendan as he becomes exhausted and beaten, often very literally, in his dogged pursuit of the truth.
A detective isn't much of anything without suspects and witnesses to question, and the collection of strange characters in Brick doesn't disappoint. The alluring rich girl Laura, the wicked sex pot Kara, the street punk Dode, the brutal enforcer Tug. They all add intriguing angles for Brendan to stumble his way through. And to top it all off you get a brilliant bit of casting in Richard Roundtree as Vice-Principal Trueman, a Lt. Bressler to Brendan's "Dirty" Harry.
Johnson's first foray behind the lens of a camera belies a natural talent. Here and there you can see the dream-like qualities of David Lynch's work, or the stylish and brutal action of Sam Peckinpah. What may leave the deepest impression though is Johnson's use of language. Employing a completely artificial set of slang and jargon, the characters' lines are a blend of detective novel innovators like Chandler and Hammett and the sarcasm and self-awareness of Joss Whedon's Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The lines seem as if they were written in a secret code, enticing you with their strangeness and cadence, rewarding repeated viewings with deeper meaning.