Ratings Guide
ONE SPORK:
This story is above average, there are a few repeating grammatical mistakes, but no paragraphs of DOOM, mini-paragraphs, and canon characters are mostly IC. ONE sues are usually useless sues, just being there.
TWO SPORKS:
What differs this from a ONE is that the Sues in TWOs are much more obvious and have plots that are WAY overused -> "random teenager trying to preform human alchemy, unsuccessful, boo hoo.", or the ever so popular "Ill use my madd awesome alchemy skillz to totallly seduce Edo-KUN!!" Grammar-wise, this sue is readable, but has common, easily fixed, grammar errors.
THREE SPORKS:
We're starting to see Sue Radiation in THREE's, canon characters randomly spazz out, and there's obvious grammar mistakes. Prodigy stories, Uber-sparkly-state alchemists, past rapers, self-inserts.. ech.. T__T Not to mention the Paragraph of DOOM. (Having a paragraph of DOOM will automatically make you a THREE or above. I don't care. I value my eyesight over "fairness".) THREE's usually make me want to spam them with links to Dictionary.com/
FOUR SPORKS:
FOUR's are painful. Sue Radiation is excessive in FOUR's, the Shift-Key and Enter-Key often loses their jobs, OOC-ness abounds. The canon characters are being raped and the Suethor's even bought in canon!sues from other fandoms, usually making them speak in ALL CAPS(oh, wait. The Shift-key got its job back.) or "OMGLOL". The Sue is extraordinarily sparklypoo or "mysteeeeeeeeeeerious" and "Worship Love At First Sight" is a common theme. Plot makes very little sense but causes strong headaches. "grammer. speeling. oh my fuking god." You should take WORD as gospel, but basic spellcheck and grammarcheck isn't that hard to do, people... (that's what the little red and green lines mean....)
FIVE SPORKS:
Reading this caused my brain to explode. Paragraphs of DOOM, severe butchering of the English language(The Shift-key, Enter-key, and various punctuation marks seem to have commited suicide, Suethor hasn't stayed awake for an English class since 2nd grade), One liners. CAPS TALK, 1337 talk, sTIcKEy TeXT, internet lingo, and exclamation points runs unchecked. The Sue/Stu itself is horror beyond belief, more sparkly than Armstrong on drugs, has more "alchemy skillz" than if Roy and Izumi had a kid, more beautiful than if he/she was created artificially, and more angst than all the little war-orphans in world's added together and multiplied by 10. Chances are, your character is a mythical being chimera.