Job Breaking Point
For me the last several months have been a bit of a struggle. Waking up and going to my job has been similiar to the action of a mentally ill person having a breakdown and putting a pitchfork into their eyes because somehow it feels good. This has pretty much been effecting every facet of my life and seeping negativity and harmful emotions where they need not be. I am currently trying to claw my way out but it is a sick mix of an abused housewife afraid to leave and being able to leave but having nowhere to go.
In the past month I have been doing a lot of research on abusive bosses and how to handle the situation but all of the articles and advice threads have led me to the same conclusion: get out and get out while you can.
There is an exceprt from an article that I was reading (http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2008/12/22/seven-rules-to-surviving-an-abusive-boss/) that really ripped into the deepest part of what I have been going through:
Once I realized it wasn’t me, that it was a sick, dysfunctional "corporate" culture that allowed my boss to be abusive, I had a decision to make. My moment of truth came when I realized I had become someone I didn’t recognize and didn’t like. Depressed, obsequious, timid, who was this person? I wanted my spirit back and the only way for me was to leave.
My breaking pioint, the point of true realization was during a head to head my boss had me do with the lead teacher that I work with. I had confided in my boss about some things going on in the classroom that were troublesome thinking that if I was open and honest things would work out. This head teacher had been grabbing and yanking the children when they misbehaved, berated me in front of the children and other employees and just unstable in her moods for quite some time and I didn't think it was a good work environment for me or the children. My boss was extremely receptive and seemed really concerned about the situation knowing that this teacher had done these things before and said that she had wanted to fire her for quite some time. Well after fifteen minutes in this meeting with my boss and this woman telling me what I was doing wrong and NOT even once asking me what I thought,well I was done. I was at my lowest point I think I have ever been. I had been called names (volatile, stubborn because I had a degree, unforgiving...etc) and just deceived beyond what I thought was possible.
Then it all hit me last weekend and here I am racing against time and sanity to fight my way out of this. Time, is the key.