Merry Christmas!
Or Happy Holidays, whichever suits you!
I know my presence has been scarce in these parts [and yes, I do miss it], but I still felt like a Christmas entry was appropriate despite my absence! I feel like a tool posting this in multiple locations, but whatever!
Sometimes, a year flies by and I have no idea where the months went.
Not this time.
This year felt SO long; it was pretty much the longest year of my life thus far! It wasn't until I was about 19 or maybe even 20 [yikes] that I began to really appreciate the lessons that time brings. It was then that I learned to always keep my eyes and heart open to new possibilities. That with every day - every year, comes another opportunity to grow. It's amazing how you can change in a year. How much you can learn. How much you thought you knew can vanish in an instant and be completely unimportant. Before, when I was a teenager, I thought I knew everything. I was one of those. Thought I knew who I was and was going to be. But the truth is, you can't know that stuff! You can have an idea. But it's never set in stone. And if you impose limits upon yourself, all you're doing is holding yourself back and preventing any room for change. I learned that's a terrible way to go through life! The world is ever-changing, why should you be in any different? How can you survive in the world if you're unwilling to adapt to things it will throw at you unexpectedly? You can't.
This is kind of the first time I remember making a true effort to look back on the year and ask myself if I'm happy with the way it went. And it's kind of crazy the volumes of things I've learned about myself. Crazy how much can change so quickly. I don't think I got a taste of how quickly time goes until this year. How quickly things can go wrong and that you'd better be able to recover from the pain because it's going to find you sometime, someday whether you like it or not. But what's important isn't how you got there or even where you're going, just how you pull through it.
I've learned so much about flexibility. Leaving room for error. Cutting people their fair share of slack. Forgiving their shortcomings and hoping to be forgiven for mine while I try to dispel them. Not letting myself fall victim to jealousy. And you know what? It's made my life SO much happier. Less stressful. I used to waste time stressing out about tons of things. I still do my fair share of worrying, but I've learned to limit its effect on me. Of course I'm not immune to moments where I break down, but I've come to accept that I'm a person that feels deeply. I used to wish that I didn't, that I could just let things slide off my back and not affect me, but that's an unrealistic expectation of myself. I think and I overanalyze but that is who I am, and of all the things I could stand to improve or change, I no longer count that as one of them. But in the year ahead I'm resolving to do less thinking and more doing. I'm not going to make the same mistakes as last year, I intend on keeping resolutions that focus on personal betterment as well as seizing opportunies to improve on others' days. I believe that in making other people happy, happiness will come back to you. What you put out into the world will be returned.
Back to how I began this entry... this year has felt like an eternity because of all the highs and lows it's seen. Difficult times can make or break relationships, and I feel fortunate that at the end of everything this year, bonds have been strengthened, words and actions that came to pass without careful thought were forgiven, and love and patience and respect and all things marvelous continued to grow and endure through the hard times. I feel like a better person, I feel like a changed person, I feel endlessly hopeful.
This year I learned to take more risks, to be unafraid to make a fool of myself, to give myself more room to experiment. I'm learning more about makeup [yay!] and fashion and what it means to be a great friend. I learned to not harp on things that bug me and to figure out ways to bypass negativity, because I have absolutely no patience for it. I learned how to be a stronger person and how to better support people when they need it. I learned that my outlook of the world when I was younger is not the same as it is now, and to be okay with changing my mind. I learned to be more confident in myself, which is a ginormous step from where I was at emotionally even just a few years ago. I learned to expand my thinking and consider things I was always either too scared of trying or just too intimidated by. I never saw Vanilla Sky, but there's a line in it that totally encapsulates my new and improved outlook on life: "Every passing minute is a chance to turn it all around." That kind of goes hand-in-hand with the T.S. Eliot quote I have on my profile.
There's also this: "Sometimes in a relationship, going through hell isn't so bad if you come out of it a little stronger. The same is true for friends."
That sums up a big portion of what has made this year so enriching. I feel such gratitude for the people I've gotten through such difficult things with. It wasn't easy by any means, but the fact that we came out of it stronger than ever really makes me feel amazing. I've been taught many lessons in compassion and understanding and I thank you.
With all of that said, I'd like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! Treasure those who keep you in their hearts and minds... always be aware of the love they have for you, and in the coming year and beyond, don't be afraid to reach to them when you need it. You are never alone, there is always someone to listen if you just allow them to.
I love you all! Thank you for the unspoken knowledge that no matter where I am or what I'm going through, your love is in my heart and comforts as well as inspires me. Continually wishing everyone all the love and happiness the world has to offer. I hope you have a lovely time over the holidays and pause to both appreciate and to remember what's truly important in life.
I know my presence has been scarce in these parts [and yes, I do miss it], but I still felt like a Christmas entry was appropriate despite my absence! I feel like a tool posting this in multiple locations, but whatever!
Sometimes, a year flies by and I have no idea where the months went.
Not this time.
This year felt SO long; it was pretty much the longest year of my life thus far! It wasn't until I was about 19 or maybe even 20 [yikes] that I began to really appreciate the lessons that time brings. It was then that I learned to always keep my eyes and heart open to new possibilities. That with every day - every year, comes another opportunity to grow. It's amazing how you can change in a year. How much you can learn. How much you thought you knew can vanish in an instant and be completely unimportant. Before, when I was a teenager, I thought I knew everything. I was one of those. Thought I knew who I was and was going to be. But the truth is, you can't know that stuff! You can have an idea. But it's never set in stone. And if you impose limits upon yourself, all you're doing is holding yourself back and preventing any room for change. I learned that's a terrible way to go through life! The world is ever-changing, why should you be in any different? How can you survive in the world if you're unwilling to adapt to things it will throw at you unexpectedly? You can't.
This is kind of the first time I remember making a true effort to look back on the year and ask myself if I'm happy with the way it went. And it's kind of crazy the volumes of things I've learned about myself. Crazy how much can change so quickly. I don't think I got a taste of how quickly time goes until this year. How quickly things can go wrong and that you'd better be able to recover from the pain because it's going to find you sometime, someday whether you like it or not. But what's important isn't how you got there or even where you're going, just how you pull through it.
I've learned so much about flexibility. Leaving room for error. Cutting people their fair share of slack. Forgiving their shortcomings and hoping to be forgiven for mine while I try to dispel them. Not letting myself fall victim to jealousy. And you know what? It's made my life SO much happier. Less stressful. I used to waste time stressing out about tons of things. I still do my fair share of worrying, but I've learned to limit its effect on me. Of course I'm not immune to moments where I break down, but I've come to accept that I'm a person that feels deeply. I used to wish that I didn't, that I could just let things slide off my back and not affect me, but that's an unrealistic expectation of myself. I think and I overanalyze but that is who I am, and of all the things I could stand to improve or change, I no longer count that as one of them. But in the year ahead I'm resolving to do less thinking and more doing. I'm not going to make the same mistakes as last year, I intend on keeping resolutions that focus on personal betterment as well as seizing opportunies to improve on others' days. I believe that in making other people happy, happiness will come back to you. What you put out into the world will be returned.
Back to how I began this entry... this year has felt like an eternity because of all the highs and lows it's seen. Difficult times can make or break relationships, and I feel fortunate that at the end of everything this year, bonds have been strengthened, words and actions that came to pass without careful thought were forgiven, and love and patience and respect and all things marvelous continued to grow and endure through the hard times. I feel like a better person, I feel like a changed person, I feel endlessly hopeful.
This year I learned to take more risks, to be unafraid to make a fool of myself, to give myself more room to experiment. I'm learning more about makeup [yay!] and fashion and what it means to be a great friend. I learned to not harp on things that bug me and to figure out ways to bypass negativity, because I have absolutely no patience for it. I learned how to be a stronger person and how to better support people when they need it. I learned that my outlook of the world when I was younger is not the same as it is now, and to be okay with changing my mind. I learned to be more confident in myself, which is a ginormous step from where I was at emotionally even just a few years ago. I learned to expand my thinking and consider things I was always either too scared of trying or just too intimidated by. I never saw Vanilla Sky, but there's a line in it that totally encapsulates my new and improved outlook on life: "Every passing minute is a chance to turn it all around." That kind of goes hand-in-hand with the T.S. Eliot quote I have on my profile.
There's also this: "Sometimes in a relationship, going through hell isn't so bad if you come out of it a little stronger. The same is true for friends."
That sums up a big portion of what has made this year so enriching. I feel such gratitude for the people I've gotten through such difficult things with. It wasn't easy by any means, but the fact that we came out of it stronger than ever really makes me feel amazing. I've been taught many lessons in compassion and understanding and I thank you.
With all of that said, I'd like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! Treasure those who keep you in their hearts and minds... always be aware of the love they have for you, and in the coming year and beyond, don't be afraid to reach to them when you need it. You are never alone, there is always someone to listen if you just allow them to.
I love you all! Thank you for the unspoken knowledge that no matter where I am or what I'm going through, your love is in my heart and comforts as well as inspires me. Continually wishing everyone all the love and happiness the world has to offer. I hope you have a lovely time over the holidays and pause to both appreciate and to remember what's truly important in life.