technology and effort and lesson-learning
So, I am a week and a half into the last run of THE LAST CASTRATO. And two days into the YOLO Solo Fest that is playing this week around the performances of CASTRATO. These shows are at the Margo Jones Theatre in the Magnolia Lounge in Fair Park.
It is extremely difficult to do shows at MJT. It is a shared space and things seem to move constantly.
In the last week and a half I have yet to leave the MJT in a happy mood. Most of the time I am frustrated. If the theatre itself is not messed or messing up (other parties tend to move and alter things in the space, like unplugging lights, moving furniture or using sets and props left in space) then CASTRATO runs crappy. Or no one shows up. Or... and so on...
The show is supposed to be a co-production between Swearingen's Fun House and Audacity, but Fun House hasn't done shit for the production. It is not even listed on the Fun House website. His genius marketing/ psycho cohort at Fun House, who is praised to the extreme for her PR and marketing chops, has not done one damn thing for the play. I find myself in the position I was in during the "old days"... carrying the whole production on my back, wearing nearly all the hats and facilitating potential recognition for others, doing art that has little purpose.
I was stupid to let myself be talked into remounting the piece. Don't get me wrong, the script is fantastic. Andy Eninger is a genius. But it is a step backwards. I'm already beyond it, especially as a director. It doesn't even fit the current mission of Audacity (thus the team up with another company). Worse, we are basically doing a frozen-in-time version that hasn't changed much since the last time we did it in 2005. I fought the actor to direct it better and deeper and more nuanced for the first two weeks of re-rehearsing it, but he always had excuses and justifications for not wanting to "change anything." He does it the way he wants it done and that's that.
When I say it is the same show, there is one variable. The passion to do it really well is different, it seems for the actor. He seems to not really get into it like he used to. It is a chore and a tragedy to watch it night after night be less than it could be. It is passionless theatre. Is there a sadder thing on earth?
This particularly stings in that it comes after a run and ramp up of success for me. I want desperately to be better and have been becoming better as a theatre artist. And this show is, as I said, a step backwards. It is something that has gotten in the way of my path and now I have to weather through it.
So, here's where my mind is now... and some take aways:
* Do not go backwards. Only forward. Glory days only stay glorious if one leaves them in the past as memories.
* Do my own work. This means not seeking out and doing "covers" of other playwrights from now on, especially with noncommitted actors.
* If I wanna stay friends with Swearingen I have to start weening back the work I do with him. Otherwise, it will lead to resentment.
* If I love it, do it myself. I was originally thinking of doing CASTRATO myself back in 2004, but I didn't have the chops then, or confidence to tackle such a solo show. Now I am equipped. If I ever wanna do CASTRATO again, I'll have to act it myself.
* The Margo Jones Theatre is an unreliable venue at best. Tonight there were computer problems and the lighting program ceased to operated halfway through the show (I had to reboot the computer DURING the show).
* I still just wanna be better than what comes across when it comes to doing theatre. I have something like the reverse of what has happened to a lot of other people I know... they, often mediocre at best, are helped out by unseen angels or are in the right place at the right time. I, on the other hand, am far above mediocre and totally give a shit, and I am beset and plagued by never being at any "right place" or at any "right time." And I am cursed with horrid luck that shows off my skills, passion and knowledge at less than its ideal over and over again.
It is extremely difficult to do shows at MJT. It is a shared space and things seem to move constantly.
In the last week and a half I have yet to leave the MJT in a happy mood. Most of the time I am frustrated. If the theatre itself is not messed or messing up (other parties tend to move and alter things in the space, like unplugging lights, moving furniture or using sets and props left in space) then CASTRATO runs crappy. Or no one shows up. Or... and so on...
The show is supposed to be a co-production between Swearingen's Fun House and Audacity, but Fun House hasn't done shit for the production. It is not even listed on the Fun House website. His genius marketing/ psycho cohort at Fun House, who is praised to the extreme for her PR and marketing chops, has not done one damn thing for the play. I find myself in the position I was in during the "old days"... carrying the whole production on my back, wearing nearly all the hats and facilitating potential recognition for others, doing art that has little purpose.
I was stupid to let myself be talked into remounting the piece. Don't get me wrong, the script is fantastic. Andy Eninger is a genius. But it is a step backwards. I'm already beyond it, especially as a director. It doesn't even fit the current mission of Audacity (thus the team up with another company). Worse, we are basically doing a frozen-in-time version that hasn't changed much since the last time we did it in 2005. I fought the actor to direct it better and deeper and more nuanced for the first two weeks of re-rehearsing it, but he always had excuses and justifications for not wanting to "change anything." He does it the way he wants it done and that's that.
When I say it is the same show, there is one variable. The passion to do it really well is different, it seems for the actor. He seems to not really get into it like he used to. It is a chore and a tragedy to watch it night after night be less than it could be. It is passionless theatre. Is there a sadder thing on earth?
This particularly stings in that it comes after a run and ramp up of success for me. I want desperately to be better and have been becoming better as a theatre artist. And this show is, as I said, a step backwards. It is something that has gotten in the way of my path and now I have to weather through it.
So, here's where my mind is now... and some take aways:
* Do not go backwards. Only forward. Glory days only stay glorious if one leaves them in the past as memories.
* Do my own work. This means not seeking out and doing "covers" of other playwrights from now on, especially with noncommitted actors.
* If I wanna stay friends with Swearingen I have to start weening back the work I do with him. Otherwise, it will lead to resentment.
* If I love it, do it myself. I was originally thinking of doing CASTRATO myself back in 2004, but I didn't have the chops then, or confidence to tackle such a solo show. Now I am equipped. If I ever wanna do CASTRATO again, I'll have to act it myself.
* The Margo Jones Theatre is an unreliable venue at best. Tonight there were computer problems and the lighting program ceased to operated halfway through the show (I had to reboot the computer DURING the show).
* I still just wanna be better than what comes across when it comes to doing theatre. I have something like the reverse of what has happened to a lot of other people I know... they, often mediocre at best, are helped out by unseen angels or are in the right place at the right time. I, on the other hand, am far above mediocre and totally give a shit, and I am beset and plagued by never being at any "right place" or at any "right time." And I am cursed with horrid luck that shows off my skills, passion and knowledge at less than its ideal over and over again.