You know when you just have one of THOSE days...
...and it seems like every little thing can manage to piss you off somehow?
Yeah, this is how my journey home went this afternoon, after a meeting with complete morons my esteemed colleagues.
Does it look like I want a London Lite / Londonpaper? (repeat about twenty times)
Bus drivers are complete and utter tossers. I'd love to know what version of the highway bloody code they're taught. No, no it's all right - you just stamp on your brakes with about two feet of space between you and the red light - send me flying towards the front of the bus, cheers for that. You bastard.
If you stand any closer to me, you pervert, I will personally see to it that your testicles are knawed on by rabid ferrets.
Oh, god - seriously. It may be Fitness First, but it's most definately shower second - something you seem to have forgotten.
It's a baby in a pushchair, not a battering ram, you twat.
The train's meant to leave in a minute and a half, care to put up which platform it'll be leaving from, anytime soon?
No, no that's fine - you just drag your suitcase across my feet - they're only my toes, I don't use them that much.
"Yes I'm just arriving at the station now. No, I'm not feeling too great actually, I think I'm coming down with something nasty" - Better bloody not be contagious, bitch, you've been snivelling all the way from London in that seat next to me.
You like Usher. Fantastic, good music taste, go you! that doesn't mean I want to fucking hear every single word of every single song on his album. Headphones are supposed to mean only you hear the music, not the entire carriage. Turn it *down* before I stamp on it.
Last time I checked, I wasn't invisible - you want to try and push me into the wall any further as you barge past to get off the train first? knobhead.
Thank God I am home. I hate humanity sometimes. Where's the chocolate and the good slashfic? lol.