She Took The Midnight Train Going Anywhere...
Friday- Did some errands, cleaned around the house as much as I could and then in the evening hung out with Spencer because I really wanted to watch more of Paranoia Agent and he had the series on DVD. I still haven't finished it but it just keeps getting more and more fucked up but still keeps you wanting to watch more. We had some drinks. I only finished one entirely. I just was like nope not getting myself tipsy or drunk. I had one smirnoff ice except it was actually a bacardi thing and then a little bit of this Cider he got. After watching like 4 episodes I went home. I for some reason got this twist in my stomach and i am not really sure what triggered my wanting to cry a bit but I knew I had to do something...I went outside and star gazed for a couple hours. I brought out my head phones and my song book with my pen. Listened to music while I layed on my lawn just looking up at the gorgeous sky. I loved that i was able to see all the stars...and for some reason it was so beauitful that is just brought the tears out of me. I only wish I could have shared that moment with someone because it was so beautiful. I was able to pick out so many constellations it was amazing. I got inspired and started writing a new song. After that I decided to go inside. I didn't even care that it was freezing out there. It is why I put on my hoodie. I shortly went to bed after that and after talking to a couple people.
Saturday- I woke up and took a shift at CPK since i originally wasn't going to work cause i thought I would have had rehearsal but lack of rehearsal meant me wanting to make some money. I came home and got a friendly surprise in my "You've got mail" mailbox. Alon had written me. We must have a sixth sense cause I was thinking about him at work and how I really need to e-mail him and see how he has been... I guess i just keep getting side tracked. Anyway It was a great letter. He was telling me good news. How his birthday was, how the parents were being jack asses (ok well that isn't good news but whatever), he finally is dating that girl he told me about when he was here, his band is doing a gig soon for 500 people (holy shit!), and the best fucking news of all.....I thought I was going to have to wait a year until I saw him again and until he moved here (which was still unsure)....but it is official....He got his green card and is moving to the states permanently in ...not july...no no....FEBRUARY! He will be here for my birthday for the first time ever! So him and i are so excited about that. I finally will have one of my longest best friends around for longer than a month! It just makes me so happy and for some reason hearing that news was like a load lifting from my shoulders...So yeah that was the main thing that made me happy that day. I didn't do much that evening. I went to dinner though with my mom to the Silver Diner. She wanted to go out so I decided even though I wasn't feeling any amount of hunger I would go with her and have something. I came home and was on the biggest power ballad binge ever/Journey binge. My guilty pleasure i guess. I am going to be making two mixes soon cause I have all these songs in mind and i just need to put them on CD. I also was listening to some Bon Jovi...yeah it was Definately 80's power ballads day. I then came across this Evanescence song while trying to find a Journey song to download, I for some reason had never heard of nor found before and it doesn't sound like it is a new song of theirs but maybe it is... i have no idea. Either way I decided to Check it out......omg...this song is amazing....so powerful with it's instrumental part, and lyrics and vocals and just whoa. I usually seem to find one song that hits my heart so hard it brings me to a waterfall of tears....this song did it for me. It is just so sad but at the same time so beautiful and it hit me hard. It is definately going onto one of my mixes. I am trying to figure out the piano for it so I can maybe play it at an open mic night but I would like someone to try and learn the guitar for it cause i can just imagine how beautiful it sounds acustic. I haven't been able to get the song out of my head since. it has been practically playing in my dreams. I can't stop listening to it either...it is just that amazing and still makes me cry a little. SO of course u know what that means... i am gonna have to write the lyrics as I am listening to it because i just can't not share this amazing song with u but for anyone who hasn't heard it...download it....it is truly a powerful and beautiful song..Anyway to finish off my weekend before writing the lyrics to the song...I spent part of last night writing more music since the song I found inspired me to do so. Went to bed and took another working shift today until 4...yay money. I am going to be seeing Heather later and do a bunch of stuff and get a bunch of things I have been meaning to get. I may see Rox later but i dunno she hasn't answered her phone and I know we said we would do something today but maybe something came up...oh well. Anyway I better get going and get ready for Rob and Heather to pick me up. In the mean time here are the lyrics...hope everyone is well. Much Love!
"Forgive Me"-Evanescence
Can you forgive me again?
I don't know what I said,
But I didn't mean to hurt you
I heard the words coming out
I felt that I would die
It hurt so much to hurt you
Then you look at me
You're not shouting anymore
You're silently
Broken
I'd give anything now
To kill those words for you
Each time I say something I regret I cry "I don't want to lose you"
But somehow I know that you will never leave me, yeah
Cause you were made for me
Somehow I'll make you see
How happy you make me, oh
I can't live this life
Without you by my side
I need you to survive
So stay with me
You look in my eyes
And I'm screaming inside that "I'm Sorry!!!"
And you forgive me again
You're my one true friend
And I never meant to hurt you
Saturday- I woke up and took a shift at CPK since i originally wasn't going to work cause i thought I would have had rehearsal but lack of rehearsal meant me wanting to make some money. I came home and got a friendly surprise in my "You've got mail" mailbox. Alon had written me. We must have a sixth sense cause I was thinking about him at work and how I really need to e-mail him and see how he has been... I guess i just keep getting side tracked. Anyway It was a great letter. He was telling me good news. How his birthday was, how the parents were being jack asses (ok well that isn't good news but whatever), he finally is dating that girl he told me about when he was here, his band is doing a gig soon for 500 people (holy shit!), and the best fucking news of all.....I thought I was going to have to wait a year until I saw him again and until he moved here (which was still unsure)....but it is official....He got his green card and is moving to the states permanently in ...not july...no no....FEBRUARY! He will be here for my birthday for the first time ever! So him and i are so excited about that. I finally will have one of my longest best friends around for longer than a month! It just makes me so happy and for some reason hearing that news was like a load lifting from my shoulders...So yeah that was the main thing that made me happy that day. I didn't do much that evening. I went to dinner though with my mom to the Silver Diner. She wanted to go out so I decided even though I wasn't feeling any amount of hunger I would go with her and have something. I came home and was on the biggest power ballad binge ever/Journey binge. My guilty pleasure i guess. I am going to be making two mixes soon cause I have all these songs in mind and i just need to put them on CD. I also was listening to some Bon Jovi...yeah it was Definately 80's power ballads day. I then came across this Evanescence song while trying to find a Journey song to download, I for some reason had never heard of nor found before and it doesn't sound like it is a new song of theirs but maybe it is... i have no idea. Either way I decided to Check it out......omg...this song is amazing....so powerful with it's instrumental part, and lyrics and vocals and just whoa. I usually seem to find one song that hits my heart so hard it brings me to a waterfall of tears....this song did it for me. It is just so sad but at the same time so beautiful and it hit me hard. It is definately going onto one of my mixes. I am trying to figure out the piano for it so I can maybe play it at an open mic night but I would like someone to try and learn the guitar for it cause i can just imagine how beautiful it sounds acustic. I haven't been able to get the song out of my head since. it has been practically playing in my dreams. I can't stop listening to it either...it is just that amazing and still makes me cry a little. SO of course u know what that means... i am gonna have to write the lyrics as I am listening to it because i just can't not share this amazing song with u but for anyone who hasn't heard it...download it....it is truly a powerful and beautiful song..Anyway to finish off my weekend before writing the lyrics to the song...I spent part of last night writing more music since the song I found inspired me to do so. Went to bed and took another working shift today until 4...yay money. I am going to be seeing Heather later and do a bunch of stuff and get a bunch of things I have been meaning to get. I may see Rox later but i dunno she hasn't answered her phone and I know we said we would do something today but maybe something came up...oh well. Anyway I better get going and get ready for Rob and Heather to pick me up. In the mean time here are the lyrics...hope everyone is well. Much Love!
"Forgive Me"-Evanescence
Can you forgive me again?
I don't know what I said,
But I didn't mean to hurt you
I heard the words coming out
I felt that I would die
It hurt so much to hurt you
Then you look at me
You're not shouting anymore
You're silently
Broken
I'd give anything now
To kill those words for you
Each time I say something I regret I cry "I don't want to lose you"
But somehow I know that you will never leave me, yeah
Cause you were made for me
Somehow I'll make you see
How happy you make me, oh
I can't live this life
Without you by my side
I need you to survive
So stay with me
You look in my eyes
And I'm screaming inside that "I'm Sorry!!!"
And you forgive me again
You're my one true friend
And I never meant to hurt you