Prozac and cabin (Stef)
The cabin is still for rent. So no the manager didn't get it rented by Saturday, because today is Sunday.
There's every chance it will still be there on the first. That, or something else.
I have got to get off of this Prozac. I took half the dose today, that I took yesterday....and I still feel so tranced-out.
I remember feeling this way, for years at a time.
I sure don't want to be depressed....but I don't want this, either. In fact I fear that if the Prozac *does* medicate away my depression, it will also medicate away my motivation to change this. That I'll just be zoned-out and okay with it....most of the time.
That was how it was, in the log house. No matter how bad things got, I could take more of this or that or the other med, and be okay with it....most of the time. But there would always come those moments when reality would break through my fog. Then usually Shotgun would come out, OD on Ativan, and end up on the psych ward. Which of course would break whatever tension had been going on in the house, and the cycle could start all over.
Nothing ever changed. Nothing.
Until I bought the first truck. My marriage got worse, but my mood got better. Then came the restraining order against Russell. The whole family was in turmoil for a time, and I was the crazy villain bitch. But today, it's rare for Russell to disrespect me, and I have a closer relationship with him than I do my other two.
Then came the restraining order and beginning of divorce proceedings against Rusty.
I should have let the restraining order stand. Maybe I should even have gone through with the divorce.
I don't want a divorce, though. Divorces break up families. I remember when my own parents divorced, how hard it was.
There's every chance it will still be there on the first. That, or something else.
I have got to get off of this Prozac. I took half the dose today, that I took yesterday....and I still feel so tranced-out.
I remember feeling this way, for years at a time.
I sure don't want to be depressed....but I don't want this, either. In fact I fear that if the Prozac *does* medicate away my depression, it will also medicate away my motivation to change this. That I'll just be zoned-out and okay with it....most of the time.
That was how it was, in the log house. No matter how bad things got, I could take more of this or that or the other med, and be okay with it....most of the time. But there would always come those moments when reality would break through my fog. Then usually Shotgun would come out, OD on Ativan, and end up on the psych ward. Which of course would break whatever tension had been going on in the house, and the cycle could start all over.
Nothing ever changed. Nothing.
Until I bought the first truck. My marriage got worse, but my mood got better. Then came the restraining order against Russell. The whole family was in turmoil for a time, and I was the crazy villain bitch. But today, it's rare for Russell to disrespect me, and I have a closer relationship with him than I do my other two.
Then came the restraining order and beginning of divorce proceedings against Rusty.
I should have let the restraining order stand. Maybe I should even have gone through with the divorce.
I don't want a divorce, though. Divorces break up families. I remember when my own parents divorced, how hard it was.