I can't concentrate
[Private post]
I hate this. I hate when Lex and I fight. I spent most of the weekend studying with Chloe and doing farm work. Yesterday was the first real free time I've had in a few weeks, so I went over to the mansion hoping Lex would have some free time. I wanted to have sex. I was horny and I missed touching him. I was starting to have fantasies about his ear lobes and nibbling on his toes after some hard fucking. Unfortunately, it didn't quite work out that way.
When I arrived we kissed and it was amazing. It felt like I'd been asleep until the moment our lips touched. I'd never say these things out loud, but Lex really rejuvenates me. He makes me feel so alive and human. When we're together I can be myself. I never have to hide who or what I am. I'd been thinking about that a lot lately. I wanted to talk about it, but I wasn't sure how to bring it up. Before I could, Lex dropped a major bomb. He told me that a few weeks ago he'd been attacked by a meteor-infected person. It will never end. The meteors continue to ruin people's lives. I tried to stress to Lex how dangerous these people can be. I should know. I've had enough run-ins with meteor infected people. Lex said this guy wasn't dangerous. He was just scared and Lex wanted to help him! How could he say that? The guy hurt Lex! I don't want Lex anywhere near them.
When I pressed Lex for details, he said it wasn't important because it was long over. I don't understand why he would tell me about the attack now, but not disclose any details. Why didn't he tell me sooner? Why wait so long? He said he wasn't hurt badly and the small wounds he did receive healed fast. I made him show me and there was no sign that he'd ever been hurt at all. That wasn't the point.
We had an argument and I stormed out of the mansion. I haven't talked to Lex since. I was just so frustrated. All I wanted was for him to tell me what happened, and I got angry that he didn't even call me when it did happen. Why wouldn't he call me? I could have helped. I went by the mansion today to talk to Brad, Lex's head of security. I thought since Lex wouldn't tell me what I wanted to know, Brad might tell me. Brad said that nothing unusual has happened at the mansion in a long time. I made him promise to call me if something happens to Lex.
I can't concentrate on school work at all now. It keeps going around and around in my mind. What if Lex was really hurt badly and I wasn't there for him? I just can't stand the idea that somebody could hurt him. I've tried to write this stupid essay a million times, but all I can think about is Lex. I even tried to shoot some hoops to burn off energy. All I ended up doing was throwing the ball so far it didn't come back.
I hate this. I hate when Lex and I fight. I spent most of the weekend studying with Chloe and doing farm work. Yesterday was the first real free time I've had in a few weeks, so I went over to the mansion hoping Lex would have some free time. I wanted to have sex. I was horny and I missed touching him. I was starting to have fantasies about his ear lobes and nibbling on his toes after some hard fucking. Unfortunately, it didn't quite work out that way.
When I arrived we kissed and it was amazing. It felt like I'd been asleep until the moment our lips touched. I'd never say these things out loud, but Lex really rejuvenates me. He makes me feel so alive and human. When we're together I can be myself. I never have to hide who or what I am. I'd been thinking about that a lot lately. I wanted to talk about it, but I wasn't sure how to bring it up. Before I could, Lex dropped a major bomb. He told me that a few weeks ago he'd been attacked by a meteor-infected person. It will never end. The meteors continue to ruin people's lives. I tried to stress to Lex how dangerous these people can be. I should know. I've had enough run-ins with meteor infected people. Lex said this guy wasn't dangerous. He was just scared and Lex wanted to help him! How could he say that? The guy hurt Lex! I don't want Lex anywhere near them.
When I pressed Lex for details, he said it wasn't important because it was long over. I don't understand why he would tell me about the attack now, but not disclose any details. Why didn't he tell me sooner? Why wait so long? He said he wasn't hurt badly and the small wounds he did receive healed fast. I made him show me and there was no sign that he'd ever been hurt at all. That wasn't the point.
We had an argument and I stormed out of the mansion. I haven't talked to Lex since. I was just so frustrated. All I wanted was for him to tell me what happened, and I got angry that he didn't even call me when it did happen. Why wouldn't he call me? I could have helped. I went by the mansion today to talk to Brad, Lex's head of security. I thought since Lex wouldn't tell me what I wanted to know, Brad might tell me. Brad said that nothing unusual has happened at the mansion in a long time. I made him promise to call me if something happens to Lex.
I can't concentrate on school work at all now. It keeps going around and around in my mind. What if Lex was really hurt badly and I wasn't there for him? I just can't stand the idea that somebody could hurt him. I've tried to write this stupid essay a million times, but all I can think about is Lex. I even tried to shoot some hoops to burn off energy. All I ended up doing was throwing the ball so far it didn't come back.