Its really fuckin hard to convince myself that i dont like a girl. Harder when she walks a drunken mile to get cigarettes with me, and hangs opn me the whoel time
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No, you can't be two people at once, and you can't have the girl who is so enamored of your friend. And you can't smoke 3 packs of cigarettes unless you want to spend the last 13 years of your life hauling around an oxygen tank with skin so brittle you have to rest your elbows on pads because hard surfaces break your skin. This girl is a cool person and it's obvious that she makes a deep impression on many people. So you can't be with her, and maybe it's not such a good idea to spill your guts to her. BUT, you can be her friend, and care about her, and decide that it's a good thing she likes such a cool guy who you respect and not some prick that's going to treat her like shit. She really likes having your friendship, that much is plain. Sometimes that is all we get to have, and in some ways that makes us the luckiest. Does that make any sense? Despite everything friends are what count. Good friends. I hate to sound cliche and say "Be happy for them" but the alternative is utter misery and bitterness. Look at me. I am
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Re: Buck up, buddy.fraydcardignboyJune 19 2003, 22:46:12 UTC
oona, your too good to me. yes what you said makes a whole lot of sense.
I still dont know if im going to spill it to her or not, but for certain reasons i would like to tell her, i just feel like im lying to her or something. And i AM happy for both of them, however, the fact that im happy for them doesnt make the pain in my chest go away.
I really wish they would both get on with it, so it would be that much more unnatainable, maybe then i could stop thinking about her...
hi. kind of a while ago we exchanged a couple of feminist lesbian jokes? this may be silly hindsight, but i'm thinking now that you should definitely be my friend. unless you aready have too many. no fuck that, be my friend.
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I still dont know if im going to spill it to her or not, but for certain reasons i would like to tell her, i just feel like im lying to her or something.
And i AM happy for both of them, however, the fact that im happy for them doesnt make the pain in my chest go away.
I really wish they would both get on with it, so it would be that much more unnatainable, maybe then i could stop thinking about her...
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stina
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kind of a while ago we exchanged a couple of feminist lesbian jokes?
this may be silly hindsight, but i'm thinking now that you should definitely be my friend.
unless you aready have too many. no fuck that, be my friend.
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...just kidding.
yea, i need a bud too. we can be intar web buddys.
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