[I'm not sober all the time, you bring me down, at least you try]
Work used to be fun, used to be aligh with people I actually cared about. Then those people turned against me. Even my ex-manager doesn't seem to want to talk to me, & Maxine only speaks to me cos she's worried she'll lose her job if she stays reclusive. I still like the people I work with, but there seems to be a "group" being formed again [just like the Amy/Maxine/Shell one before] I feel that the only person I can talk to in that place & be completely honest with is Ronnie these days. She never judges me & tbh I think she feels the same about me. We share everything that bothers us with each other & she'll let me know if there's any bitching going on. It's really hard to believe she's more than 30 years older than I am. I'm sick of my hours being cut. I know I wanted them cut but I only wanted like an extra day off or something, yet I've earnt 30 pounds less than I normally do. & people seem to be getting the time off they want after I've asked & tried to neogotiate [sp?] to have it off. I actually had somewhere booked, but noooooooo the "special bunch" get top priority. I don't think I mean to bitch but I'm mad at my brother, I put false nails on my mum & got the glue all over my habds which won't come off, I have PMT, I feel sick for no reason & I have a headache that I'm making worse by listening to loud music & shouting at my brother. I didn't have a very good day at work either, 4 hour shifts make me groggy cos there's nothing to do in the afternoons so I was made to do some heavy cleaning. I desperately need a new job but the reality is it's so hard to get one right now that it doesn't seem worth trying. Urgh, I'm bringing myself further down & acting like my life is so hard when really it isn't, I just need some perspective.
Nan gave me a newspaper cutting with a childcare training group on it, so I might find some time to have a look later on. It's got to be better than the crap I have a work now, anything would be better than putting up with that.
Bah, after that rant I could do with some chocolate... appologies for going on =/
On the plus side, I've had a letter confirming the Torchwood con, my new bag came & I got my Superman/girl/woman/dude xD tshirt. However, I am sending my new phone straight back! I'm not going into it because I'll start another rant & bore you all over again. & I finished Primeval series 2 re-watch [minus episode 3 cos it bores me...] I think next series, aside from focussing on the new characters & aftermath of Stephens death, might well see Abby & Con together, finally! <3
Well, that's about it, sorry to have banged on though I do feel miles better than when I first started the entry =) Really don't want to go to work tomorrow, but I'll have something hyperactive-inducing before I start, try & make the ill-feeling go away.
Much love x