free expression
college essays. blah. i procrastinate, i started long in september. still arent finished.
or am i still just perfectionistic? well atleast now i know its not just my fault.
my mom's standards are higher than even mine!
though i could blame alot on her, i choose not to.
things are really well.
ive learned to handle alot of things.
everytime i reread old entries, look at my old way of expression.
scares me honestly. i dont understand how my body withstood all that.
then again it didnt really. not that well
i still cant stand a room colder than 75 F.
and ive been sick since the start of fall.
can't fight a cold fer shit.
poor adam.
kid gets near everything from me.
but i realized the consequences throughout it all.
its taken me ten months so far.
ten months to four years.
it'll take me til forever still i know.
but god damnit every fucking day is worth it.
every so often adam asks when the last time was
my answer's " when's the last time you asked?, cause it hasnt changed."
and i feel.. older.
highschool just feels so, done.
i'm gone from it constantly
but i havent once fallen behind
photography is just everything ive hoped it would be.
art & philos. is something i just pour myself into.
trig is a cinch, geez i dont think ive ever had an easier math class
and bio is the most fun ive had in awhile.
people have changed.
that ive noticed alot
and its wierd cause adam's changed me.
one year in less than a month.
things are really good
but we dont talk about college anymore.
the decision between Beloit and North Central
is entirely up to me.
ninety minutes or fifteen?
entirely new place or familiar?
ill be positive which one
than the other one will draw me in again.
they're both great.
i just cant make up my mind.
its hard.
damn indecisiveness.
anyway, its late, im stoned.
lets pass out.. shall we?
or am i still just perfectionistic? well atleast now i know its not just my fault.
my mom's standards are higher than even mine!
though i could blame alot on her, i choose not to.
things are really well.
ive learned to handle alot of things.
everytime i reread old entries, look at my old way of expression.
scares me honestly. i dont understand how my body withstood all that.
then again it didnt really. not that well
i still cant stand a room colder than 75 F.
and ive been sick since the start of fall.
can't fight a cold fer shit.
poor adam.
kid gets near everything from me.
but i realized the consequences throughout it all.
its taken me ten months so far.
ten months to four years.
it'll take me til forever still i know.
but god damnit every fucking day is worth it.
every so often adam asks when the last time was
my answer's " when's the last time you asked?, cause it hasnt changed."
and i feel.. older.
highschool just feels so, done.
i'm gone from it constantly
but i havent once fallen behind
photography is just everything ive hoped it would be.
art & philos. is something i just pour myself into.
trig is a cinch, geez i dont think ive ever had an easier math class
and bio is the most fun ive had in awhile.
people have changed.
that ive noticed alot
and its wierd cause adam's changed me.
one year in less than a month.
things are really good
but we dont talk about college anymore.
the decision between Beloit and North Central
is entirely up to me.
ninety minutes or fifteen?
entirely new place or familiar?
ill be positive which one
than the other one will draw me in again.
they're both great.
i just cant make up my mind.
its hard.
damn indecisiveness.
anyway, its late, im stoned.
lets pass out.. shall we?