All Time Low
If there's anyone out there who's ever wondered how desperate I am for conversation, then wonder no more! I have here an all-time low for myself, showing just how much I need interactions with similarly-minded people.
The following text is a conversation between myself and a random girl. This conversation occurs on Neopets, and you may notice that my grammar takes a bit of a hit for it, because each of my messages is limited to 1400 characters, and I have to be very cautious of my language. As a general rule, when communicating with someone, I expect them to use proper grammar and punctuation, or I may not respond. I always try my best to send the most articulate and understandable message as possible and I expect the same in return. I take time to be as clear in my messages as possible, and if someone refuses to do the same to me then I will interpret that as that person feeling that I am not worth the time it would take for them to press the "Enter" key and I will interpret their lack of capitalisation/punctuation as a sign that they do not respect me.
So, the fact that this conversation carried on as long as it did is simply a sign of how depressing my life has become.
Girl: wanna be nfs??? if you want to send me a nfr
Fox: If I add you will you talk to me? I don't want to be just a number, I want people who will converse with me.
Girl: sure OMG you like BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! awesome thats my fav show My fav chracter is Spike the guy with the blonde hair I really wanna be friends with you !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fox: I love Spike. His character so well developed. Joss Whedon did a great job in having him go through all that character evolution without ever feeling like he was being derailed. All of his less aggressive traits were there right from the start, he always liked watching soap operas and he always liked writing really bad poetry, they were just brought more into the light after he was chipped.
But, really, what ultimately makes Spike the incredible character that he is is his ability to understand and empathise with other characters and to adapt to how they need him to treat them. This is noticeable throughout the series. In season two the way he interacts with Drusilla is so notably different from the way he treats everyone else. Or in the comic arc between seasons five and six, where Dawn expresses that she feels most comfortable around Spike. Or in season six when Buffy begins to turn to him, feeling that he's the only one who understands her. Even with Harmony, in "Harm's Way" when he is the one capable of placating Harmony even with some very... odd ideas, but he understands this because he is so readily capable of getting into her head.
Girl: I love that show!!! Spike only burned him self to make Buffy like him and he wanted to get the chip out instead all he got is a soul thats so sad I love spike I wish he was a part of my family
Fox: Um, no, Joss Whedon confirmed Spike wanted a soul. He thought it would make him worthy of Buffy, and he felt guilty about what he'd almost done to her. Spike says so himself in "Beneath You". He also is very hesitant to remove the chip when it comes time to.
Earlier in the series, Tara points out why Spike and Buffy's relationship couldn't have worked out if he didn't have a soul. He ultimately had no moral compass. Everything he does he does out of love for her, which may sound good and all, but not all decisions can be made that way, because ultimately, they're all selfish. I think the one act that almost looks selfless that Spike really commits before he receives the soul is staying for the summer between seasons five and six, but really that was because he promised Buffy he would. What it really shows is the continuing theme of Spike being a man of his word, which showed up as early as "Lie to Me". Spike does what he promises to do. Except when he promises to leave. Not that anyone is complaining about that one.
Girl: I think Spike didn't try to hurt Buffy when he met her because he liked her
Fox: Didn't try? He attacked her in her school and would have won if Joyce hadn't smacked him with the fire axe. There was some immediate attraction on Spike's part, though that was mostly just the way James chose to play the part.
In any case, Spike really didn't think of Buffy as much more than a worthy foe in the beginning of the show. That's why he sought her out multiple times. Spike really didn't know he was in love until he had his little epiphany dream, even with Drusilla spelling it out for him. And it isn't until he finds her weeping on her back porch that he really admits it to himself. It's such a wonderful scene, just the way all the emotions go across Spike's face. The little sound he makes in the back of his throat as he's trying to decide what to do. The way he pats her back, somewhat awkwardly, because it really is an awkward situation. And then just sitting in silence. But, best of all, that little sigh of his at the very very end, when you know that, yeah, he knows. He knows he's got it so so bad. I remember the first time I watched that scene, I was on the edge of my seat just going 'Don't speak, don't speak' and they didn't and it way amazing.
Girl: I love spike so cute Buffy was dumb to reject him
Fox: She had her reasons, but the belief that he was unable to love her was rather unfounded. Especially after watching his interactions with Dru, and she even used his unwavering dedication for Dru as leverage fairly early on in the series in "Lie to Me". Unlike Angel or Riley, Spike really was longhaul guy, but I think looking at that frightened Buffy, especially since he was a vampire. If he was capable of loving without a soul, then why didn't Angel love her without his?
And, of course, it also raises the worrying question of if Spike can reform and feel guilt, then how many vampires did she mindlessly stake without an actual reason.
Girl: I remember in a episode buffy was sitting crying outside of her door and then Spike was about to hit her but he was like Are you ok??? is there something I can do that was so nice
Fox: Um, yeah, I was talking about that one earlier. It's the end of "Fool for Love". It's such a wonderful scene, just the way all the emotions go across Spike's face. The little sound he makes in the back of his throat as he's trying to decide what to do. The way he pats her back, somewhat awkwardly, because it really is an awkward situation. And then just sitting in silence. But, best of all, that little sigh of his at the very very end, when you know that, yeah, he knows. He knows he's got it so so bad. I remember the first time I watched that scene, I was on the edge of my seat just going 'Don't speak, don't speak' and they didn't and it way amazing.
Girl: Does spike die I never got to finish the last season
Fox: I thought you were talking about the end of season seven earlier... Or do you mean season five of Angel? Or do you mean in the comics, season eight and season nine?
Girl: I was talking about all of them I was talking about random episodes
Fox: I understand that. I thought you mentioned the BtVS season seven finale "Chosen" in there earlier. Did you see that or were you, in your last message to me, talking about the fifth season of Angel?
Do you understand what I'm asking?
Girl: Kinda I don't remember really much I haven't watched it for a while lets forget about it and not talk about it anymore
My favorite characters were Spike,Buffy,Anya,Glory,Dawn kinda,Xander kinda,Faith kinda,Giles,Willow kinda,Angel I liked angel in the begininng then he sorta got carried away,And more characters
Fox: My favourites are Spike, Tara, Dawn, Fred, Willow, and Drusilla.
When I first saw Angel... not so much. He was a creep. He followed Buffy around, hid his own identity, had some clichéd lines, and angsted over how he couldn't be with her. Then he went evil, and I loved him. He was so overtly evil but he wasn't the over-the-top, hammy, super villain type of evil like The Master or Lothos. Then he started being so cruel to Spike, who up until this point had shown nothing but adoration and affection for Angelus, and I just... couldn't. Also, he seemed to be allergic to shirts. =(
He gets aggravating, and makes a lot, and I mean a LOT, of bad choices, because he can't accept people changing on their own. Angel is constantly manipulative. When he is evil, this can be seen as Angelus being cruel, when he's good, he's just misguided. He makes people's decisions for them, and it's wrong, but I do love a flawed protagonist, so points to him. Ultimately, though, Angel really does mean well, which means that while I don't really love him by any means, I appreciate him as a character.
Girl: I didn't get to Fred which season was he in??? I like all of the one you like too
Fox: Fred is a girl... She's in Angel from the end of season two, "Over the Rainbow" or in "Belonging" if you want to talk about on-screen appearing, but that's only in Cordelia's vision. I believes that she's in every episode after that, up until late season five's, "A Hole in the World". Which is another episode I love, for the stark contrast between Angel and Spike that is displayed, while at the same time showing how much they care about each other.
Girl: I don't wanna talk about this anymore only me and my sis know that show and we can get in trouble if somebody catches us seeing it
Fox: I sincerely doubt we have anything else even remotely in common. Bye.
---
Yeah.
You may or may not notice how she's very obviously not actually reading a single thing I said to her...
This journal is helping my desperation, though. At least here I can just set my thoughts down and not have to deal with the fact that they're being specifically ignored, they're just being ignored in the general sense. It's better.
(Conversation originally took place on Neopets over the week of 15/4/12-21/4/12)
The following text is a conversation between myself and a random girl. This conversation occurs on Neopets, and you may notice that my grammar takes a bit of a hit for it, because each of my messages is limited to 1400 characters, and I have to be very cautious of my language. As a general rule, when communicating with someone, I expect them to use proper grammar and punctuation, or I may not respond. I always try my best to send the most articulate and understandable message as possible and I expect the same in return. I take time to be as clear in my messages as possible, and if someone refuses to do the same to me then I will interpret that as that person feeling that I am not worth the time it would take for them to press the "Enter" key and I will interpret their lack of capitalisation/punctuation as a sign that they do not respect me.
So, the fact that this conversation carried on as long as it did is simply a sign of how depressing my life has become.
Girl: wanna be nfs??? if you want to send me a nfr
Fox: If I add you will you talk to me? I don't want to be just a number, I want people who will converse with me.
Girl: sure OMG you like BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! awesome thats my fav show My fav chracter is Spike the guy with the blonde hair I really wanna be friends with you !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fox: I love Spike. His character so well developed. Joss Whedon did a great job in having him go through all that character evolution without ever feeling like he was being derailed. All of his less aggressive traits were there right from the start, he always liked watching soap operas and he always liked writing really bad poetry, they were just brought more into the light after he was chipped.
But, really, what ultimately makes Spike the incredible character that he is is his ability to understand and empathise with other characters and to adapt to how they need him to treat them. This is noticeable throughout the series. In season two the way he interacts with Drusilla is so notably different from the way he treats everyone else. Or in the comic arc between seasons five and six, where Dawn expresses that she feels most comfortable around Spike. Or in season six when Buffy begins to turn to him, feeling that he's the only one who understands her. Even with Harmony, in "Harm's Way" when he is the one capable of placating Harmony even with some very... odd ideas, but he understands this because he is so readily capable of getting into her head.
Girl: I love that show!!! Spike only burned him self to make Buffy like him and he wanted to get the chip out instead all he got is a soul thats so sad I love spike I wish he was a part of my family
Fox: Um, no, Joss Whedon confirmed Spike wanted a soul. He thought it would make him worthy of Buffy, and he felt guilty about what he'd almost done to her. Spike says so himself in "Beneath You". He also is very hesitant to remove the chip when it comes time to.
Earlier in the series, Tara points out why Spike and Buffy's relationship couldn't have worked out if he didn't have a soul. He ultimately had no moral compass. Everything he does he does out of love for her, which may sound good and all, but not all decisions can be made that way, because ultimately, they're all selfish. I think the one act that almost looks selfless that Spike really commits before he receives the soul is staying for the summer between seasons five and six, but really that was because he promised Buffy he would. What it really shows is the continuing theme of Spike being a man of his word, which showed up as early as "Lie to Me". Spike does what he promises to do. Except when he promises to leave. Not that anyone is complaining about that one.
Girl: I think Spike didn't try to hurt Buffy when he met her because he liked her
Fox: Didn't try? He attacked her in her school and would have won if Joyce hadn't smacked him with the fire axe. There was some immediate attraction on Spike's part, though that was mostly just the way James chose to play the part.
In any case, Spike really didn't think of Buffy as much more than a worthy foe in the beginning of the show. That's why he sought her out multiple times. Spike really didn't know he was in love until he had his little epiphany dream, even with Drusilla spelling it out for him. And it isn't until he finds her weeping on her back porch that he really admits it to himself. It's such a wonderful scene, just the way all the emotions go across Spike's face. The little sound he makes in the back of his throat as he's trying to decide what to do. The way he pats her back, somewhat awkwardly, because it really is an awkward situation. And then just sitting in silence. But, best of all, that little sigh of his at the very very end, when you know that, yeah, he knows. He knows he's got it so so bad. I remember the first time I watched that scene, I was on the edge of my seat just going 'Don't speak, don't speak' and they didn't and it way amazing.
Girl: I love spike so cute Buffy was dumb to reject him
Fox: She had her reasons, but the belief that he was unable to love her was rather unfounded. Especially after watching his interactions with Dru, and she even used his unwavering dedication for Dru as leverage fairly early on in the series in "Lie to Me". Unlike Angel or Riley, Spike really was longhaul guy, but I think looking at that frightened Buffy, especially since he was a vampire. If he was capable of loving without a soul, then why didn't Angel love her without his?
And, of course, it also raises the worrying question of if Spike can reform and feel guilt, then how many vampires did she mindlessly stake without an actual reason.
Girl: I remember in a episode buffy was sitting crying outside of her door and then Spike was about to hit her but he was like Are you ok??? is there something I can do that was so nice
Fox: Um, yeah, I was talking about that one earlier. It's the end of "Fool for Love". It's such a wonderful scene, just the way all the emotions go across Spike's face. The little sound he makes in the back of his throat as he's trying to decide what to do. The way he pats her back, somewhat awkwardly, because it really is an awkward situation. And then just sitting in silence. But, best of all, that little sigh of his at the very very end, when you know that, yeah, he knows. He knows he's got it so so bad. I remember the first time I watched that scene, I was on the edge of my seat just going 'Don't speak, don't speak' and they didn't and it way amazing.
Girl: Does spike die I never got to finish the last season
Fox: I thought you were talking about the end of season seven earlier... Or do you mean season five of Angel? Or do you mean in the comics, season eight and season nine?
Girl: I was talking about all of them I was talking about random episodes
Fox: I understand that. I thought you mentioned the BtVS season seven finale "Chosen" in there earlier. Did you see that or were you, in your last message to me, talking about the fifth season of Angel?
Do you understand what I'm asking?
Girl: Kinda I don't remember really much I haven't watched it for a while lets forget about it and not talk about it anymore
My favorite characters were Spike,Buffy,Anya,Glory,Dawn kinda,Xander kinda,Faith kinda,Giles,Willow kinda,Angel I liked angel in the begininng then he sorta got carried away,And more characters
Fox: My favourites are Spike, Tara, Dawn, Fred, Willow, and Drusilla.
When I first saw Angel... not so much. He was a creep. He followed Buffy around, hid his own identity, had some clichéd lines, and angsted over how he couldn't be with her. Then he went evil, and I loved him. He was so overtly evil but he wasn't the over-the-top, hammy, super villain type of evil like The Master or Lothos. Then he started being so cruel to Spike, who up until this point had shown nothing but adoration and affection for Angelus, and I just... couldn't. Also, he seemed to be allergic to shirts. =(
He gets aggravating, and makes a lot, and I mean a LOT, of bad choices, because he can't accept people changing on their own. Angel is constantly manipulative. When he is evil, this can be seen as Angelus being cruel, when he's good, he's just misguided. He makes people's decisions for them, and it's wrong, but I do love a flawed protagonist, so points to him. Ultimately, though, Angel really does mean well, which means that while I don't really love him by any means, I appreciate him as a character.
Girl: I didn't get to Fred which season was he in??? I like all of the one you like too
Fox: Fred is a girl... She's in Angel from the end of season two, "Over the Rainbow" or in "Belonging" if you want to talk about on-screen appearing, but that's only in Cordelia's vision. I believes that she's in every episode after that, up until late season five's, "A Hole in the World". Which is another episode I love, for the stark contrast between Angel and Spike that is displayed, while at the same time showing how much they care about each other.
Girl: I don't wanna talk about this anymore only me and my sis know that show and we can get in trouble if somebody catches us seeing it
Fox: I sincerely doubt we have anything else even remotely in common. Bye.
---
Yeah.
You may or may not notice how she's very obviously not actually reading a single thing I said to her...
This journal is helping my desperation, though. At least here I can just set my thoughts down and not have to deal with the fact that they're being specifically ignored, they're just being ignored in the general sense. It's better.
(Conversation originally took place on Neopets over the week of 15/4/12-21/4/12)