It's Hard to Believe (X-Posted from OD)
Well...
This is it. This is what I am supposed to have lived for my whole life.. this moment.. the moment where I realize that I've left home, and have gone into the real world -- college.
I'm in my dorm.. my roommate is trying to go to sleep. I feel as though I have to tip-toe around in my own "home." Odd. I miss Evelyng, and it's only been a day. I miss LeeAnn, and it's only been two days. I miss my dog; it's only been a day. I miss everyone. I'm 30 minutes from home, but it feels like 30 hours. You never realize how comfortable you are in life until it changes. What a change.. or.. what changes! All at once.. so many. New home, new food, new rules, new schedule, new habits, new people, new scenery, new new new. New is a funny word... just look at it. And I'm a funny person.. just look at me.
I have talked to quite a few people since Wednesday (the first day I was here for band camp).. most of them being in band. Talked to a few at the greek orientation bbq today, but nobody exciting. I was eating dinner by myself and someone felt sorry for me (her name was Ann, to be precise), and told me to come sit with "us." I tried to be cordial and whatnot, but it didn't work. They were too social. I like social and friendly people.. but sometimes too much is just gagful. So that was the extent of my meeting people.. a few band people, really.
It is SO hard to believe I'm an adult and that I'm living on a college campus.. (let alone that its' the University of Miami, with it's total cost of $34,000 a year). I am not quite sure that I really believe I'm here.. maybe I will on Wednesday, when I go to my first class. I have to have my schedule changed tomorrow, though.. as I have some odd classes. They are:
Intro to Environmental Science --
The Freshman Experience --
Marching Band --
Finite Math --
Intro to Psychology --
Elementary Spanish --
I think I signed up for chem, not enviro. I've decided I don't really want to do the freshman experience thing. Marching band is only one credit, and it's not really like a class. Finite Math is like 4 steps behind Calculus I, which I just finished passing the AP exam for. Intro to Psychology is good. Elementary Spanish I'll have to change to something else, because while it would help toward graduating as a psych major, if I switch to music, it will count for nothing.. so I'll prolly switch to humanities or something.
Oh, and of course, my roommate. Need to mention her. She's a Stage Management major, and so she's also in the College of Arts and Sciences. She's real into video games, Final Fantasy stuff and Pokemon (You'd like her, LeeAnn). She's Asian. She was pretty reserved initially but is starting to relax now. She likes the a/c to be cold. She loves Sublime. She wears glasses and recently shaved off most of her hair. She is messy. She has her alarm clock set for 8am, which means I should prolly stop ticking away at my computer so she can get some decent sleep.
I'm physically here.. but not mentally here. I'm in a room with a complete stranger, and have reduced my living space by like 150%. Gotta wonder what the hell I'm doing in this place. Nonetheless, it's hard to believe.