hello update!
i've got two finals tomorrow. korean at 10 and math at 12. i started studying for math at 10pm. played rockband from 12-145 and i've been downstairs in the lounge of my dorm last year until 315 taking notes on sections i should've taken notes on weeks ago. i texted joseph constantly, which prolonged the process.
i should be studying but i'm not. i'm sitting in bed with my computer and rupert and my books and notebooks sitting on my comforter, wondering why my eyes are stressed and dry.
i am thinking that i should probably start writing again. there is this chunk of missing emotional muttering in my journal about mayhaps the most traumatic relationship-related experience of my life. hopefully that is the worst it'll ever get.
the past couple of days i haven't been smoking that much. as much as i had been before i went to california, and definitely not as much as i did when i was in california, driving around in my little honda with the windows down. i'm flying back on friday and i thought i had bought enough cigarettes to last me the week and a half that i would be in evanston, but i'm running out of marlboro menthols and i only have 72s. (damn you austin for indirectly influencing me to buy 72s, they are wretched).
i took a nap today.
after i ate breakfast/brunch with my great grand big. me and jen are starting to find this newfound dedication to our new sorority. i feel like a silly girl. but i'm going to pa! which is like pe except pea. i am excited.. strangely. i hope this doesn't disturb my plans to visit joseph and have him visit me next quarter.
also, i've still been planning on applying for that one job. hopefully i'll be bored out of my mind enough to do it sometime this week. maybe in the spring i'll crawl back to hollister to grab a few extra dollars but i can't see how a few extra dollars a week is worth all the trouble. even in the long run.
my parents are moving and i don't want to pack up my stuff. i'd rather have my mom do it so i can forget everything that i've ever owned and hopefully it will all go away and i can live off my two suitcases full of clothes and go wherever joseph wants to go with me.
i bought two rockstars and i have half a cherry coke and another can in the fridge. and a little coffee. i think i'm saving the coffee for tomorrow to get me through the morning. i don't know. i don't usually go to bed until 5 anyways but this seems daunting. i've only really done this in places that i really thought was home.
me and joseph have been sleeping on the phone together and i've racked up 4075 minutes in the past month. 796 peak minutes. this includes time that i've spent on the phone with other verizon users but it can't amount to much. who spends 70 hours on the phone with their boyfriend, not including when it's light out? iiiiii doooo. and i'm sad cause i can't study while he sleeps on the phone next to me tonight.