third day
i really don't know if i have the will to continue to this. i'm ashamed to say that... but i am seriously going crazy. i have a mountain of homework that i can't concentrate on for the life for me, plus one class i am on the verge of dropping (no need to go into this) and i'm so effing hungry! jason left his pb and j's here on accident and i just unwrapped them and smelled one for a minute or so. that sounds so crazy! but i did it. i almost stuffed the whole damn thing in my mouth like a wild animal. but i literally can't at this point... eating anything would make me sick right now and i know it. i wish i could cheat! i would...
i woke up this morning feeling fine... but i don't know. the first 3 days are supposed to be the hardest, but i'm sick of this. i like my toxic self... way more interesting that's for sure. this whole thing is building a wall between my husband and i as well... i wish we could just order pizza, get a six pack and hang out by our breakfast bar window like we always do. i just don't know if i'm ready to do this right now. i'm way behind on school and i'm super disoriented and irritated. i miss my life.
patience has never been one of my endearing qualities...
i woke up this morning feeling fine... but i don't know. the first 3 days are supposed to be the hardest, but i'm sick of this. i like my toxic self... way more interesting that's for sure. this whole thing is building a wall between my husband and i as well... i wish we could just order pizza, get a six pack and hang out by our breakfast bar window like we always do. i just don't know if i'm ready to do this right now. i'm way behind on school and i'm super disoriented and irritated. i miss my life.
patience has never been one of my endearing qualities...