For the record....on feminism in marriage

[fonda5150]

Ok….so I wasn’t planning on doing this (I truly do hate explaining myself, especially because doing so usually makes one sound like a bigger idiot than they started off sounding like), but after the chaotic drama that I inadvertently got mixed up in on 

Comments

[wrenwren8]

Although I myself am not married, I will offer up my perspective anyway :). I agree with all thats said above about equality and compromise for a health marriage. But as a Christian I will also say that while decisions should be made together, and consideration given from both partners, if an agreement cannot be reached, in the end, someone has to have the final say. I would have no problem letting that be the man. He wants the accura, you want the pontiac... In the end, how long is the debate gonna go on before someone gives? If I have had the opportunity to try to pursuade him and he does not give it consideration, then he was probably a poor choice in a mate to begin with. If he does give consideration and is not pursuaded by my arguments, then so be it. Is is sexist? I do not think so. It's more like a pecking order to keep things running smoothly. It's just a structure and dynamic of a relationship I would choose, which may not work for someone else. Has nothing to do with women's rights. Those decisions about a

[fonda5150]

Very well said. As usual (that's why I love you sooooo much).

My favorite saying: Pick your battles.

As with every disagreement, you have to decide if the result you want is worth what it will cost you to get it.

[of_salfarro]

if its always the man in all relationships then ya its sexist.

[fonda5150]

Agreed...but that's just it...a healthy relationship can't be ALWAYS anyone. The man or the woman.

ahhh

[wrenwren8]

But my point was this....We have become a society where starting at a very early age, we have adopted this notion of equality that all things and people must be equal. Thats an impossible mission to fulfil in every aspect of life. As for the relationship part, it is fair and equal for both parties to have a say and to give one another consideration. But let's face it, when he reallyreallyreally wants A and you reallyreallyreally want B, and no one is willing to give in, what do you do?? Smack him in the head and just do what you want?? Bottom line is, whether its the male or the female, someone needs to have the ultimate say when those very few and far inbetween disagreements do occur. Though I would most likely defer to the male (I should have men knocking down my door with THAT one lol), that does not mean that would work in every situation. Some may have a dymanic in which the female makes final decisions. If I were dating a hermaphrodite and deferred, would it still make me sexist? lol In a parent child relationship, does