Excuses

[flwyd]

Tam just came up with "I'd love to go out with you, but I have to prepare for the apocalypse" to fit nicely with the standard fortune set:

• "I'd love to go out with you, but I did my own thing and now I've got to undo it."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I have to floss my cat."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I have to stay home and see if I snore."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I never go out on days that end in `Y.'"
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I want to spend more time with my blender."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I'm attending the opening of my garage door."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I'm converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I'm having all my plants neutered."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I'm taking punk totem pole carving."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but I've been scheduled for a karma transplant."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but it's my parakeet's bowling night."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but the last time I went out, I never came back."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but the man on television told me to stay tuned."
• "I'd love to go out with you, but there are important world issues that need worrying about."

Also, if I didn't already have way too many T-shirts, I'd get me one of these.