Non artists will never steal my heart like that

[flouritephoenix]

No matter how fucking fantastic a normal guy may be, and I've met a few, no man will ever be able to make me love him as much as an actor or musician does when he's up there doing his thing. That is, if I'm already madly in love with him. The way I feel about him when he's up there...I feel my heart expand to twelve times its size and just want to rush up there and kiss him, but the fact that I can't just makes that feeling grow even more in me. I take the energy that I build up and let it swirl around the room. I could never love a normal guy in any moment like I've loved these men in those moments.

(And yet life isn't made of moments. Life is the long haul. This is not a statement that I can never be a lover of a normal man. It is a statement that I will guard jealously my love for these brilliant performing men because I love these sensations swirling around my body.)