Catch Up (AKA, Choke On The Length Of Nothing Happening)

[flipped]

A gargantuan amount of plot has happened since my last substantial post, so this is an attempt to catch up in Reader's Digest form. To be honest, probably nothing has happened, and this all is just more of the same being repeated everywhere and anywhere, but it happened to me and around me, so it must be important, right? Most of the plot

Comments

[svala_lj]

FWIW, there's an awesome book out called, "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz. It's really helpful in reframing the rude/obnoxious behaviour of others-- on that subject, Ruiz says (Not an exact quote):

Don't take ANYTHING personally. Remember that each person is acting out his or her own little play, interpreting all external events through the filter of their own experiences. People's reactions don't have anything to do with you, really-- 50 different people will react in 50 different ways to one action of yours.

He, of course, says it much more eloquently than I could.

I recently took his advice, and it allowed me to sit next to and enjoy the company of a woman on the train who would normally have pissed me off majorly. She spent a lot of the ride giving the server shit for the food available on his cart, commenting about how uncomfortable she was, the train was late and that was a BIG problem, thank you very much, etc etc... I was, for once, able to avoid tensing up; instead, I was really mellow and just observed her behaviour as if it had nothing to do with me (which it didn't really...). I was able to see that she just really wanted attention, and had learned to get it in negative ways. We eventually ended up having a great conversation about natural medicine.

[flipped]

I like that advice. I think we sometimes tend to be sucked into other's problems and feel the effects of them. Especially when people use their troubles as a sole means to control or feel connected with you. That can be very draining, and it's pretty manipulative.

It's especially difficult to see that a lot of times when people lash out that they are hurting themselves.

[svala_lj]

Oh, yeah. People's actions are really all about them, that's for sure. And we really are our own harshest judges & worst enemies.

Four Agreements is a small book, but full of good stuff (maybe a little mystical in spots, but only when he brings his Toltec ancestry in). I just picked up the companion guide today, to help me work on this stuff some more. That and "The Dance of Anger" have been HUGELY helpful to me lately. Good stuff. :)

[flipped]

I'll have to keep that one in mind. I have a mountain of books I have to get through though before I buy anymore. I promised myself. :)