pardon me, I'll never be the same

[flight_by_night]

no matter how bad you think you have things, there's always someone who is in a much worse happenstance. no matter how ugly and fat you think you are, you're gorgeous compared to a huge portion of the world. And no matter how beautiful or popular, or confident someone appears to be, they probably are only half the person you think they are. Know this- alot of people look up to you. They wish they could have your style, your hair, your clothes, your eyes, your skin, your body, and your social skills, social status, and personality. People think you're interesting and most likely have compliments for you, left unsaid because they would feel too awkward telling you how awesome you are. The truth is, you're important. you have meaning, significance, and you influence everyone who happens to interact with you. Whether you realize this or not, you do have an effect. You either leave someone feeling lifted up, or discouraged. No matter how much you've messed things up for yourself, you can always, always, always, make amends... go back to being honest and pure...you can always start over. you have as many chances as there are seconds in you're existence. Don't ever think, "well its too late, everyone already thinks I'm a (blank) There's no point in trying to redeclare my virtue" because, for 1. what people have heard about you they dont entirely believe, anways. 2.people will always doubt you, but you know where your heart stands. you know your intensions. 3.people will eventually recognize your sincerety, and furthermore be encouraged by your strength and exersions. one more thing, girls: it doesnt matter how much you like him. or how special he makes you feel. or how "different" he is. Stop chasing him. stop thinking about him constantly, stop speaking to him in sexual overtones and with implied intimacy. You're beautiful. You're better than him. MUCH better. he doesn't deserve you. HE should be chasing YOU. Don't allow yourself to look desperate for his sake. You dont need him in order to feel loved and accepted. You dont need him to know you're worthy of much love. Call up a girl friend and spend time with her, she's much more important. she will tell you you're beautiful and that you deserve nothing but the best. She'll be by your side always. Put her before him. one last thing- stop putting yourself down, in order to fish for compliments. (Example: you say "I'm so fat..." in order for someone to reassure you that, no, you are not fat at all.) Ultimately, all you have to do is compliment someone else, sincerely, and they will in return open up and let you know what they admire about you, but have never had the boldness to say so.

this whole entry is entirely written to myself, things that I need to remind myself of in order to acquire a little serenity.