(no subject)
So, it's been a long while. Life has been going pretty great except for the lack of hanging out with friends. It's beginning to feel like I have no friends except for the boyfriend and his friends and occasionally hanging out wiht Amy. That's the one thing missing from my life right now.
Other than that, I've changed jobs within my company this summer and now I'm in sales. I never thought I'd be sizing and selling pumps and heat exchangers for a living. Seriously.
I'm waiting on hearing back about getting approved for a USDA home loan. It's too good of a deal to not wait for. I hope I get approved because I'm not sure I could afford a home without it. I'm tired of apartment life and my poor dog deserves a yard. Aaaaannnnddd I'm lazy and hate having to take him out for walks in the rain.
John and I looked at engagement rings and wedding bands this weekend and are talking about getting married in April. It would be a big plus that it would help us get funding for school. It's pretty fucked up that we can't get help otherwise unless we wanted to wait to go to school until we were 24. Hmph. I'm finishing up my AA requirements this term, but I'm not sure I want to continue after this. I've been going crazy going to school after work... It's just too much. I don't think I can handle it any more and it's taking all of my money out of my pocket. Maybe in a year or so I'll be ready to go back for my bachelor's, but no way in hell am I going back right away. No thank you. Anyway, I think what's bugging me about getting married is that John wants a big wedding, he finally feels at a point where he knows who he wants to come and who he would want to be his best man... I don't have a "dad" to walk me down the aisle, I'm not even sure if I'm going to invite my father at all. He didn't even come to my graduation after I struggled with myself about inviting him at all and I took the chance and it wasn't worth it. And... I don't really have anybody to have as a maid of honor, let alone any bridesmaids, or even many people to invite at all. It's depressing. Can't we just go to Vegas or the courthouse? I dunno. Hopefully I'll figure it out.
Anyway, it's pretty trippy to think of where I am in my life right now. I never thought I'd be thinking about getting married at this point in my life and possibly getting a house. Then again, half the people I grew up with now have a kid or more and most aren't married. I would NOT be able to handle kids right now, and I know I won't be able to in the next 5 years or more. Good for them if that's what they want, but my life would be in shambles right now. At least I didn't fuck up that aspect in my life. Maybe I may want that in the distant future, but not any time soon.
Maybe after this term is over, I can start hanging out with people more, but it feels like I've lost all of my friends. :/ That's something I definitely need to work on.
Other than that, I've changed jobs within my company this summer and now I'm in sales. I never thought I'd be sizing and selling pumps and heat exchangers for a living. Seriously.
I'm waiting on hearing back about getting approved for a USDA home loan. It's too good of a deal to not wait for. I hope I get approved because I'm not sure I could afford a home without it. I'm tired of apartment life and my poor dog deserves a yard. Aaaaannnnddd I'm lazy and hate having to take him out for walks in the rain.
John and I looked at engagement rings and wedding bands this weekend and are talking about getting married in April. It would be a big plus that it would help us get funding for school. It's pretty fucked up that we can't get help otherwise unless we wanted to wait to go to school until we were 24. Hmph. I'm finishing up my AA requirements this term, but I'm not sure I want to continue after this. I've been going crazy going to school after work... It's just too much. I don't think I can handle it any more and it's taking all of my money out of my pocket. Maybe in a year or so I'll be ready to go back for my bachelor's, but no way in hell am I going back right away. No thank you. Anyway, I think what's bugging me about getting married is that John wants a big wedding, he finally feels at a point where he knows who he wants to come and who he would want to be his best man... I don't have a "dad" to walk me down the aisle, I'm not even sure if I'm going to invite my father at all. He didn't even come to my graduation after I struggled with myself about inviting him at all and I took the chance and it wasn't worth it. And... I don't really have anybody to have as a maid of honor, let alone any bridesmaids, or even many people to invite at all. It's depressing. Can't we just go to Vegas or the courthouse? I dunno. Hopefully I'll figure it out.
Anyway, it's pretty trippy to think of where I am in my life right now. I never thought I'd be thinking about getting married at this point in my life and possibly getting a house. Then again, half the people I grew up with now have a kid or more and most aren't married. I would NOT be able to handle kids right now, and I know I won't be able to in the next 5 years or more. Good for them if that's what they want, but my life would be in shambles right now. At least I didn't fuck up that aspect in my life. Maybe I may want that in the distant future, but not any time soon.
Maybe after this term is over, I can start hanging out with people more, but it feels like I've lost all of my friends. :/ That's something I definitely need to work on.