Pieces to a puzzle...

[fixthepast]

Somehow I've found myself working for the Company.  Still not sure how that happened but it's not something I was going to turn down either.  A chance to be around all these specials?  Gain their powers and fuck with their minds?  What's not to love?  But for now I have to do all the tedious work and the first person I get to see is Sylar. He comes

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[heartofmurder]

"Yeah, she clearly has good taste if she'd spending her time with the senator and not with you," I chuckle, watching him. He thinks he can deny things, but we both know human nature. I know how people work.

"I don't know, Petrelli. I think you want to find out how we work because you hate yourself. You hate how much less than you are. Less than your brother, not good enough for your mom. And your dad? Forget it. He probably hated you. Nathan is a lot older than you, isn't he? You were probably a mistake." I give him an evil grin. This is just too much fun. "She probably wont listen to you anyway. Maybe I should talk to Nathan."

[fixthepast]

He will not win, I won't let him. He might think he can crack me but he won't. I've been doing this too many years for something like that to happen. He's going to try though, and try hard. "Or maybe I have better taste." I smile, though it doesn't reach my eyes.

"That's good, really good." I laugh. "Too bad you're wrong." I don't hate myself, I hate them. I know I'm better than they are, I always have been. "As for being a mistake, if you think that's a surprise, you're sadly mistaken." He says he should talk to Nathan and my nails dig in deeper but I keep the smile on my face. "Go ahead. He'll have nothing to do with you. If he has his way, you'd be rotting in a cell."

I watch his face. "So if you want outside and not to rot the rest of your life in a cell, I'm your only hope." My smirk widens a bit. "But go right ahead." I let go of my other hand, pushing the phone towards him. "I'll give Nathan's number."

[heartofmurder]

I can see how hard he's trying to be strong, trying to keep it inside. I bet people don't usually dig as deep. They just get flustered by his questions, his talk of feelings, but they never try to get inside of his head. It's what I do too. "If you had better taste, you wouldn't be sitting here with a clock you hate on your wall and nothing but a bunch of pens on your desk." He'd have a lot more in his life.

My smile gets wider, "Oh, but I'm not wrong. You probably don't even know it, though. You have yourself convinced. My, that's a feat unto itself." I nod my head, "Must be hard, knowing all your life that you were a mistake. I don't like talking to mistakes." Oh his face, it's priceless. I can hear his fingers digging into his skin, blood rushing to the surface. "I'll take my chances."

"You're not my only hope. Don't delude yourself. You're just the pick of this week." I lean forward, taking the phone, "Good, while I'm at it, I'll ask him how he feels about you."

[fixthepast]

"Maybe I haven't found anything worth wasting my time with." My voice is starting to get an edge to it and I hate it. He's the only one to ever get under my skin and I want to tear his head off for it. "Just because I have nothing here doesn't mean I don't have things at home." Bastard.

I don't have myself convinced of anything. I know who and what I am, I don't need him to tell me anything. "Then don't talk to me, no one's making you." I just want to wrap my hands around his damn neck, show him just what it is I am. He might actually appreciate it but he might give me up and I can't have that.

His last statements push me over the edge and I lose control for the first time since I found out what I could do. The anger spills over and the glass on my desk and the others on the bar explode, tiny shards of glass spraying everywhere.

[heartofmurder]

"I bet your home is just like this place. Absolutely nothing of value to you. You probably have some furniture, a pile of psych books that you think are important to you and your nicely lined up suits." I run my gaze over him.

"Unfortunately they are making me. So here I am. But this is more fun." I can hear his heart beat speeding up more and more and the fire growing behind his eyes. It's a wonderful thing to watch. It looks good on him.

I can see exactly when I crack that exterior. His brother is an even deeper wound than his mother. But what I don't expect is the crack of glass, pieces flying everywhere as bottles explode. I flinch, bringing up a wall of tk around me, then look at him, my eyes going wide. And then... then a grin spreads across my face as I see it. Now I can see the pieces in his head moving together like clock work. "You. You have an ability." I stand walking closer to him. He's so angry he's vibrating and everything is vibrating with him.

[fixthepast]

I don't even move when the glass explodes, steering it around me so it doesn't touch me. Bastard! I can't believe he got to me like this. I never should've let my guard down, I know better. I let my emotions get the better of me because I'd found a kindred spirit. My mistake. Now I have to fix it.

My eyes narrow as he grins and he gets up and walks over to me. I don't move but I can feel everything inside of me wanting to just break lose. I glance at my desk out of the corner of my eye and see the pens jumping around in the holder. Shit. He really has messed me up. I have to get control again.

"Well, that much is obvious now, isn't it?" I say snidely. "It means nothing. Half the people that work here have one, you have more than one." So do I but he doesn't know that yet. "So whatever you think this means, it doesn't. It changes nothing."

[heartofmurder]

I can see how broken he is and I wish I would have known sooner. I don't know why, but I do. Now I can see everything inside of his head and I understand it all. He's desperately trying to get back control, but he knows I got the upper hand here and it's killing him.

"Oh, it means everything." I lick my lips, watching him, then my eyes lock on to his, "So do you. You have more than one as well. I can see it. All I needed to see was one ability and now I can see them all. All this fucking time you lied to me. You're the person who's like me!" I lift him with my tk, pushing him back against the wall.

If I could have his ability, that's all I would need. I wouldn't ever have to worry about killing again because all the abilities would just be right there. He said the others didn't kill, so that must apply to him. "You should have formed a better rapport with me, then maybe I would feel worse about doing this." I keep a strong hold on him, that dark glimmer returning to my eyes. I want it so bad I can taste it.

[fixthepast]

Shit. I know that look, I see it in the glass when I'm running my experiments. Stupid Peter, very stupid. He might try to kill you but you're not completely helpless either. "Did you really expect me to tell you of all people what I can do? I'm not stupid, no matter what you might think to the contrary

[heartofmurder]

"Did you really expect me not to find out?" I retort, shaking my head. "That's the problem with all of you. You think you can fool me, double cross me, whatever the fuck you all want to do. I will always be smarter than you. I will always figure everything out." Stupid indeed.

"If I kill you, it wont matter. I'll have so many abilities that they wont be able to stop me." I'm practically salivating at the thought. He doesn't have a whole lot to work with here either. He has nothing I want besides his ability. "Actually, I have asked you. I've asked you many times, remember?" I jab at his head, "Just like before, you weren't paying attention. You're not very good at your job."

I give him a shrug, "I don't care anymore. This is everything I need." There are agents right outside, I know that. But I can be out of here before they even blink an eye. I put my hand over his mouth and lift my finger to cut into his head. It's okay. Just this once and I wont have to worry about the need to kill ever again.

[fixthepast]

"No, I figured you would eventually, I was hoping that we'd become...partners first." He really is something to see. I wonder how many people he's made scream that they don't even know about, if he enjoys the fear in their eyes like I do

[heartofmurder]

I give him an amused look. "Partners? You know how much I hate everyone here. You know I'm a solitary person. What on earth made you think I would want that?" My god, he's even stupider than I thought

[fixthepast]

"You said you wanted to change some parts of you but not all of them. Is this really going to do that? Aren't you going to just go back to where you were? You didn't want to kill anymore, defeats the purpose of all this then if you kill me." I grit out.

"You talked about all the things that everyone wants. You want those too, don't you." I try not to cry out when he starts slicing into my head. "If you didn't want something from us all, you wouldn't be here, trying to make changes to be accepted." It's hard to think and my mind doesn't want to cooperate. "You want family. You said that I was pathetic for hating my family, avoiding them. You have no one, you have no family anymore. You want that. You can have a family but not if you kill again."

[heartofmurder]

I don't want to go back to where I was, not before, but I'm too deep into this now. If I let him live, he'll tell all of them. I'll have to run or give myself up to them which I'll never fucking do. Don't let him get inside your head.

"Shut up!" I growl at him, "I don't want anything but this." But that's not true. Not anymore. Even though the pain on his face when I cut into him, the light sweat that's forming on his brow... those are all things I miss, all things I long for. It's not like he can really help me anyway, can he?

When he tells me how much I want family, how I have no one now and I wont ever if I kill again, I freeze, breathing heavily. "You're going to tell them anyway. They're just going to throw me back into a cell!" Don't listen to him, damn it! Just take the damn ability and be done with it. Having all these abilities, I wont need anyone. I'm fine on my own. I am.

[fixthepast]

Even I can tell that he doesn't want to do this, otherwise I'd be dead already. The pain is getting stronger and I don't think I can hold on much longer but I need to or he's going to kill me. Clenching my teeth together, I force myself to look at him, ignore the blood running down my face.

He stops and I almost pass out just from the relief of the pain but I take deep breaths and look at him. "I'm not going to tell them anything. I don't want you locked up anymore than you do. If you really want to change those things, I can help you. I know you don't think so but I can. But first you have to stop this. If you kill me, you lose everything."

[heartofmurder]

I swallow hard, searching his face. He has been trying to get me out there, get me to go out in the field. I think. It's what he's been saying, but I'm not even really sure. I hate not being sure.

I don't want to lose everything. I've been working so fucking hard, holding myself back from killing for all these months. If I do this now, it will all have been for nothing and I'll never have anyone on my side. I let go of him, letting out a gasp and stepping back. Now he's either going to yell for the agents or not. Please don't let him betray me.

[fixthepast]

He's searching my face and I just keep my gaze steady on him. It hurts like hell and I want to scream but I know that would be the biggest mistake of my life. I can handle the pain, I just need him to stop and see that I'm not going to betray him.

Falling to the floor with a hiss as he lets go, I shake from the adrenaline rushing through me. Taking out my handkerchief, I press it against my forehead and try not to pass out. After a moment, I get to my feet and look at him. "Now that we have that out of the way, have a seat." I make my way over to the bar, grabbing a bottle of water to clean myself up with. I'm going to have to get a new suit and figure out how to hide this until I get home.

Wetting my handkerchief down, I start cleaning at my face. "I wasn't lying when I said I wanted you out in the field, that I wanted to help you stay out of a cell. I am on your side, whether you believe me or not." Taking a deep breath, I turn back to him. "Are you going to let me help you or not?"