Meme on a Theme...PT II

Aug 21, 2016 01:50



21. Where would you like to go?

Bodie: The pub.

Doyle: He gets like this.

Cowley: I've a yen to see Scotland again. Maybe I should take you two with me, show you what a real pub looks like.

Napoleon: How about I take you to dinner, Illya?

Illya: Why?

Mr Waverly: Perhaps it would simplify matters if I took you both to dinner, I'm sure Mr Kuryakin would be less suspicious of my motives. Isn't that so, Mr Kuryakin?

Spock: If I wished to be somewhere else, I would be somewhere else. This is a very illogical line of questioning.

Kirk: Don't let it rattle you, Spock.

Dr McCoy: Attaboy, Spock. You hang in there.

22. Name 3 people who will complete this?

Bodie: Well, you are Doyle, and you, sir. Need a third…ummm

Doyle: You, you dolt.

Cowley: CI5's finest. Fine pair, you make.

Napoleon: Illya and I, and Mr Waverly. Three by my count.

Illya: I bow to your grasp of higher mathematics.

Mr Waverly: It would appear U.N.C.L.E. is in safe hands, if we ever open a kindergarten section.

Spock: I have, you have, Jim, and Dr McCoy.

Kirk: I can't fault your logic, Spock.

Dr McCoy: No, but wouldn't it make you feel all warm and fuzzy if you could?

23. Do you own slippers?

Bodie: I think so.

Doyle: Mine are at yours. No, wait a bit, those are yours. Where are mine, then?

Cowley: Aye, a fine pair I was given last Christmas.

Napoleon: Of course. Elegant, simple, I like to think they add a touch of class to my more informal attire.

Illya: My informal attire looks like my formal attire.

Mr Waverly: I sincerely hope not, Mr Kuryakin. The embassy will be expecting black tie. And my slippers are where they should be, warming by the fire, awaiting my return.

Spock: I do not believe I have any item of footwear which could be described as such.

Kirk: They're not necessary on a starship.

Dr McCoy: Well, they may not be necessary, but I like them and I have a pair. You don't know what you're missing, Spock.

24. What colour shirt are you wearing?

Bodie: It's a polo neck, and it's brown.

Doyle: It's a t-shirt, green.

Cowley: Pale blue.

Napoleon: White.

Illya: White.

Mr Waverly: We appear to have something of a full house, gentlemen.

Spock: Blue.

Kirk: Yellow, gold…I don't think even the Academy can make up its mind.

Dr McCoy: Well the braid's gold, Jim. Mine's blue, same as the Vulcan.

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets?

Bodie: I'm a delicate mechanism, I need pampering. There was this bird once who had this big round bed. She 'ad these lilac satin sheets, does things to your skin, satin.

Doyle: I went home with bird who 'ad black satin sheets, chains, handcuffs, the lot. Made me excuses, get enough of that with the job.

Cowley: Aye, I've some fond memories, but I prefer something more practical.

Napoleon: Yes.

Illya: I can confirm this, he does. Even when THRUSH have impregnated them with hallucinogenic drugs.

Mr Waverly: Yes, a very unfortunate incident, it might be prudent for you to curb your more hedonistic instincts in the future, Mr Solo.

Spock: Satin, when made from silk, can be light and durable. It can also remain cool against the skin.

Kirk: Star fleet regulations don't often allow me the luxury.

Dr McCoy: How can you describe satin, Spock, and entirely ignore the poetry of it? What a race, those Vulcan senses are wasted on you.

26. Can you whistle?

Bodie: Yes, very tuneful I am too.

Doyle: Yeah, he does, especially if I'm trying to get some kip.

Cowley: I don't have much call for it these days.

Napoleon: I can.

Illya: I, also.

Mr Waverly: I find myself doing so less and less.

Spock: It is a skill of limited utility.

Kirk: I can, although I don't. It seems whistling starship captains make people nervous.

Dr McCoy: Spock means he can't, Vulcan genetics get in the way. Although he's half human and it's not technically impossible for a full blooded Vulcan to whistle. He's just a sourpuss. Now me, I whistle all the time.

27. Favourite colour?

Bodie: Dunno, that's a bird thing, isn't it?

Doyle: I like green.

Cowley: I've a soft spot for blue, but I've better things to be thinking about than this foolishness.

Napoleon: Well, I'm very fond of red lipstick.

Illya: I'm sure you'll look very fetching in it.

Mr Waverly: Please don't encourage him, Mr Kuryakin.

Spock: Certain colours are more harmonious than others. Vulcans have a branch of science which is dedicated to the exploration of this phenomenon.

Kirk: You never cease to amaze me, Spock.

Dr McCoy: Only Vulcans would make a science of it. What kind of people dissect a rainbow?

28. Would you be a pirate?

Bodie: Bloody nearly was.

Doyle: Just see you with an eye patch, where's yer wooden leg?

Cowley: I'm more intrigued as to the whereabouts of his parrot, Doyle.

Napoleon: A-ha, Jim lad…cutlasses at dawn…swashbuckling across the main…I think I'd fit in perfectly.

Illya: That accent's worse than your French one.

Mr Waverly: I have, in my time, been accused of being somewhat piratical. However, I draw the line at knee breeches. Hardly suitable for a man in my position.

Spock: Piracy is not to be commended.

Kirk: Not the criminality, Spock, no, but they were fine sailors, and Captains who had to win the support of their crew. You know they actually elected them. In many ways a starship on a voyage like this has a lot in common with those old wooden sailing vessels.

Dr McCoy: You would have had a ship's Surgeon in those days too, Jim. But medicine was in its infancy, as much superstition as science, I would have lost more than I saved. Thank the Lord, we don't have plague ships anymore.

29. What songs do you sing in the shower?

Bodie: Hymns.

Doyle: He does, too. But you wouldn't recognise the words.

Cowley: If I didn't already despair of your soul, Bodie, that might put the tin lid on it.

Napoleon: Depends on the company.

Illya: Good Russian songs, which I can no longer hear on the radio.

Mr Waverly: I'm afraid I'm rather partial to a little Gilbert and Sullivan.

Spock: I see no benefit to singing whilst in the shower.

Kirk: I never know until I get in there.

Dr McCoy: You have no soul, Spock. A man should sing in the shower, relieves all kinds of tensions. I favour Clementine, myself. Not the same in these new fangled contraptions, of course. To get the full benefit, you need a proper, old fashioned, honest-to-goodness shower. Can't remember the last time I had one of those.

30. Favourite girl's name?

Bodie: Susan.

Doyle: I used to like Ann.

Cowley: Aye, Annie's not been lucky for either of us, Doyle.

Napoleon: Clara, once.

Illya: It is a Russian name.

Mr Waverly: I married her.

Spock: Amanda, although I once heard a Romulan name one might consider rare and beautiful.

Kirk: Your Mother, Spock.

Dr McCoy: An impressive lady. Both your parents, Spock. Though with the same Achilles heel, they failed to fully appreciate the qualities of their son. I hope you know Star Fleet isn't so blinkered.

31. Favourite boy's name?

Bodie: Take your pick, William, Andrew or Philip.

Doyle: I'll stick with Bodie.

Cowley: And I'll stick with 3.7, 4.5.

Napoleon: Napoleon, what else?

Illya: Narcissus?

Mr Waverly: Quite so, Mr Kuryakin.

Spock: A name is a means by which an object or individual may be catalogued or identified and therefore tends to reveal more about the namer than the named.

Kirk: A rose, by any other name, eh Spock?

Dr McCoy: Don't encourage him, Jim.

32. What's in your pocket right now?

Bodie: Me wallet and some chewing gum.

Doyle: Wallet, lighter.

Cowley: A pocket handkerchief, which is all a gentleman need carry, besides his wallet.

Napoleon: Money, lighter, handkerchief - a few little doodads U.N.C.L.E. dreamt up.

Illya: As Napoleon, with the addition of a garrotting wire.

Mr Waverly: I carry a little money and some tobacco and, of course, my handkerchief.

Spock: My uniform has no pockets.

Kirk: Nor mine.

Dr McCoy: Ah, for a white coat…

33. Last person who made you laugh?

Bodie: Him.

Doyle: Him.

Cowley: Them.

Napoleon: Illya, I believe.

Illya: I'm quite positive it was Napoleon.

Mr Waverly: Well, I must admit to finding certain aspects of your last affair to be somewhat whimsical, gentlemen.

Spock: I am a Vulcan. I refrain from laughter.

Kirk: I believe I've caught you smiling.

Dr McCoy: Well, speaking as his physician, Jim, I'd put money on his being ticklish.

34. Best toy as a child?

Bodie: What is it the yanks plead?

Doyle: He had a teddy bear.

Cowley: As did I, Doyle.

Napoleon: A bike.

Illya: Books.

Mr Waverly: I seem to remember being rather fond of a teddy bear.

Spock: Vulcan children do not have toys as humans would understand them.

Kirk: Vulcan children have games, though.

Dr McCoy: I had an Aunt who was always buying me those sorts of games. Sometimes a child doesn't need to be improved, what he really needs is to skin his knee climbing a few trees.

35. Worst injury?

Bodie: Yeah, well, depends on how you look at it, doesn't it?

Doyle: Got shot.

Cowley: Yes, we have that in common at least, Doyle.

Napoleon: Few near misses, but I'm in one piece.

Illya: Luck has been with us.

Mr Waverly: It is said some men make their own luck, Mr Kuryakin.

Spock: I died.

Kirk: I thought I had.

Dr McCoy: This is why they pay me the big bucks.

36. Where would you love to live?

Bodie: In the lap of luxury.

Doyle: Dunno, France, maybe. I could do some real cooking there.

Cowley: Scotland.

Napoleon: New York.

Illya: I have not decided. It is complicated.

Mr Waverly: I am content where I am, I'm a little long in the tooth for gallivanting, I leave that sort of thing to the younger men.

Spock: Vulcan.

Kirk: Starship Captains make their homes on board their vessels. Maybe the country, when I retire, I have a fondness for horses.

Dr McCoy: I have a fondness for anywhere I can't feel a deck beneath my feet.

37. How many TVs do you have in your house

Bodie: One, how many do you need?

Doyle: Yeah, one, but I was thinking about getting one of those portable jobbies for the bedroom. Not sure if you need another license for one of those, though.

Cowley: Aye, one. Though, I listen more to the wireless.

Napoleon: Two.

Illya: Why?

Mr Waverly: Three. We sometimes have guests.

Spock: None. I'm not aware of any member of the crew who has one.

Kirk: Television? Not sure I've met anyone in the fleet who has one, Bones?

Dr McCoy: We've run across them from time to time, strictly period pieces.

38. Who is your loudest friend?

Bodie: Him.

Doyle: Him.

Cowley: There was a wee lad when I was maybe six, you could've heard him above a force nine. Died in North Africa.

Napoleon: I cast no aspersions.

Illya: Mmmm…

Mr Waverly: I did have a rather deaf Aunt, consequently, my Uncle. Rather appropriate, if not entirely to the point.

Spock: I would suggest a competition between Mr Scott and Dr McCoy might prove edifying.

Kirk: My money's on Scotty.

Dr McCoy: Well, technically Uhura wins, you can hear her from the bridge just about anywhere.

39. How many dogs do you have?

Bodie: None.

Doyle: Nope.

Cowley: I've always had a fancy for a wee highland terrier, but none.

Napoleon: None.

Illya: None.

Mr Waverly: Alas, none at present.

Spock: None.

Kirk: None, but maybe when I retire…

Dr McCoy: A man's best friend, good choice, Jim.

40. Does someone trust you?

Bodie: Do you, Sunshine?

Doyle: Yeah.

Cowley: My country invests a great deal of trust in me. I do not intend to let it down.

Napoleon: I'd like to think Illya does.

Illya: He does.

Mr Waverly: The men and women under my command, it is not a responsibility I take lightly.

Spock: I would hope…Jim?

Kirk: Implicitly, Spock.

Dr McCoy: You're irritating, Spock, not untrustworthy.

41. What is your favourite movie?

Bodie: The Great Escape. Or Emmanuelle.

Doyle: Obsessed, that's what you are.

Cowley: Aye, not a bad film. Some fine performances.

Napoleon: Gigi.

Illya: It is a Russian film. I have not seen it for many years.

Mr Waverly: I've rather a soft spot for The Adventures of Robin Hood, Errol Flynn, don't you know?

Spock: I prefer the theatre.

Kirk: I like to read when I can get the chance, but Bones has dragged me to see a western or two.

Dr McCoy: Or three, or four…admit it, Jim, you like them.

42. What's your favourite sweet?

Bodie: Spotted dick with custard.

Doyle: Rising above the obvious, pavlova - unless you mean from the sweet shop, in which case he'll have a gobstopper.

Cowley: I have some fond memories of black treacle toffee.

Napoleon: I'm not particular, so long as it comes with cherries jubilee.

Illya: I'm not particular.

Mr Waverly: I've always rather enjoyed a steamed pudding.

Spock: I believe I have already explained Vulcan nutritional requirements.

Kirk: Ice cream.

Dr McCoy: Good thinking, Jim, ice cream.

43. What's your favourite sports team?

Bodie: Liverpool for the cup.

Doyle: Keep taking the pills.

Cowley: If you two comedians have nothing better to do, I'm sure I can find you something.

Napoleon: We're kept a little too busy with THRUSH to follow sports.

Illya: Unfortunately, this is so. His team also loses, quite regularly.

Mr Waverly: I'm afraid I've rather lost touch, U.N.C.L.E., you know.

Spock: If I understand the concept correctly, then I do not support a team.

Kirk: I'm afraid life aboard a starship, especially on a mission of this kind, doesn't leave much room for anything else.

Dr McCoy: I'm a Doctor, not a sports fan.

44. What song do you want played at your funeral?

Bodie: Oh, that's cheerful.

Doyle: How about the hokey cokey?

Cowley: I wouldn't put it past you, Doyle.

Napoleon: Something very long and imperial, which hasn't been written yet. I'm not planning to go early.

Illya: I've no wish to go at all.

Mr Waverly: Indeed, Mr Kuryakin.

Spock: I expect that the appropriate rites will be observed.

Kirk: Every single time, Spock, until you decide to stay dead.

Dr McCoy: Let that be a comfort to you, Spock.

END

the man from u.n.c.l.e, meme, mfu_canteen, star trek, the professionals

Previous post Next post
Up