wierddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
this is only wierd or fate trying to push me back to a specific area lol, cause shana jokingly told me to move back today. AND i cannot remember the last time he actually even got on aim.
Me (7:31:05 PM): so this is going to sound lame and all but i got like super depressed the other night thinking about you lol
Josh (7:31:16 PM): why? don't do that
Me (7:33:26 PM): i dont know...because well.. i had a drink or two so i was a little buzzed but i just thought about you and all i could think of were good thoughts, and then i just thought about my life a few years from now, and it not being spent with you, and i just got really really sad lol, and like thinking of you sharing your life with someone else, even though to my knowledge i know your not just really got to me, and i blamed myself cause i was the one that wanted to break up, and i just... it was bad..not to freak you out or anything but yeah i freakin miss you kid! hehe
Josh (7:34:18 PM): i miss you too actually. it doesn't freak me out at all really, it's almost cute
Me (7:35:23 PM): i guess for the first time i actually sat down and thought about it and it was like a reality check and i did not like it heh
Josh (7:36:06 PM): im sorry. i wish everything with my job wouldn' have been so crazy. i mean i felt like i super let you down and i felt bad about it.
Me (7:37:23 PM): im just mad at myself for like...giving up, i mean your so worth every tear i cried every night i spent alone, you were, and still are worth it all
Josh (7:38:06 PM): awww, i just wish i could have spent more time with you concentrating on us. i feel super retarded about it, but i do think about it pretty much daily
Me (7:39:17 PM): well if i can accept that your job is an ass, and you can accept that im an ass for just giving up, lol maybe possibly hopfully we can maybe possibly if your willing to give it another try possibly, eventually maybe someday soon hopefully lol
Josh (7:39:58 PM): i think we could work on that. i'd like too, at least hang out and see what happens.
Me (7:40:53 PM): that would be super awesome
*deep breaths*
Me (7:31:05 PM): so this is going to sound lame and all but i got like super depressed the other night thinking about you lol
Josh (7:31:16 PM): why? don't do that
Me (7:33:26 PM): i dont know...because well.. i had a drink or two so i was a little buzzed but i just thought about you and all i could think of were good thoughts, and then i just thought about my life a few years from now, and it not being spent with you, and i just got really really sad lol, and like thinking of you sharing your life with someone else, even though to my knowledge i know your not just really got to me, and i blamed myself cause i was the one that wanted to break up, and i just... it was bad..not to freak you out or anything but yeah i freakin miss you kid! hehe
Josh (7:34:18 PM): i miss you too actually. it doesn't freak me out at all really, it's almost cute
Me (7:35:23 PM): i guess for the first time i actually sat down and thought about it and it was like a reality check and i did not like it heh
Josh (7:36:06 PM): im sorry. i wish everything with my job wouldn' have been so crazy. i mean i felt like i super let you down and i felt bad about it.
Me (7:37:23 PM): im just mad at myself for like...giving up, i mean your so worth every tear i cried every night i spent alone, you were, and still are worth it all
Josh (7:38:06 PM): awww, i just wish i could have spent more time with you concentrating on us. i feel super retarded about it, but i do think about it pretty much daily
Me (7:39:17 PM): well if i can accept that your job is an ass, and you can accept that im an ass for just giving up, lol maybe possibly hopfully we can maybe possibly if your willing to give it another try possibly, eventually maybe someday soon hopefully lol
Josh (7:39:58 PM): i think we could work on that. i'd like too, at least hang out and see what happens.
Me (7:40:53 PM): that would be super awesome
*deep breaths*