Call me a safe bet...I'm betting I'm not.........
I have recently come to the conclusion that I am in love with self loathing.
The more twisted threats and angry verbal beatings I partake of, the better. I virtually 'get off' on getting
myself down, so to speak. Because there is beauty in verbal abuse. It takes some eloquence and attention to detail
to really hit home and deliver a stinging slap across the conscious' face. In a twisted way, it is in itself, an artform.
An artform that I have been perfecting upon myself for ages and one that I believe I am pretty damn good at. There is no goodness
in life that does not somehow tie in to the badness, whether it is the fear of goodness gone awry, or the inherant badness
that we fear in human nature, you cannot have good without bad. Pleasure without pain. I would not have it any other way.