Long Days
Well, not to start off this entry with pessimistic, bad, sad news, but...
Jim lost his job. He was in the process of being trained for a supervisor position. He was the most well-liked, well-respected senior in the store. Several people, mostly those that worked under him, quit when they heard he was fired. Not that that does anyone any good.
He works at a store, a store which we happened to go shopping at two Saturdays ago (not his store, but a different location of the same chain.) When we went to pay. Jim gave the cashier his employee number to receive his employee discount. But we put it on my debit card. I didn't know, and he didn't even think about it. We didn't even realize it until that Monday, when his manager approached him about it. For all the world, it (apparently) looks like we were trying to abuse his employee discount by using his number while I was paying. Honest to God, it was a mistake. It was quarter to ten at night, we had been shopping all day and were dead tired, and he just didn't think about it when I swiped my card (I was closer to the card reader, by the way - that is why I paid with my card.) Monday afternoon, after Jim had called me from work, I rished home to get the merchandise and the receipt, and went back to the store explaining what happened. I had the cashier return all the merchandise and then charge me full price for all of it. Thursday night I stayed up til 1AM helping Jim write a letter to be faxed to his superiors regarding his error, how much he enjoyed and valued his job, etc. Predictably, that did nothing. "Abusing" an employee discount is grounds for firing, and apparently it doesn't matter if you do it buying a flat screen TV or a 99 cent candy bar. He was fired over a $33.47 sale.
Sooooooo, things have been tense. He's sitting at home trying to look for jobs and straighted out unemployment, and apparently having waaay too much time to mull things over (most notably "How the world is fucking him over", to quote him.) I'd be bitter too, and upset, and all of that. I feel terrible beyond words, and am very angry at the store. But I can only be around the extreme negativity for so long before it leaves a nasty mark on me and I start acting that way, too. I do not react well to upset people. If someone is angry about something, I get angry, too. Even when Jim watches football games and started getting really pissed off and yelling, well, I get angry too - at him. Well, tonight there was a hockey game and my stupid weirdo defective nerves completely frazzled out after two hours of "SHOOT it!"s and "What the FUCK?"s and etc. I have no idea why I get angry at things that aren't even directed at me. Maybe it's a completely effed-up defense mechanism or something. I've always been this way ever since I was little and you can imagine all of the interesting situations I made worse with my reactions. At any rate, it's best for everyone if I leave for a little while when I get like that. I do it calmly and I try to make it clear that I am not leaving because I'm mad at someone - tI don't ever elaborate why, as that would make me sound like a crazy person ("I can't handle people getting really angry and yelling, even if it's at the TV! OK, see you later, I'm off to the loony bin!") I just say that I just need to get out for a bit. So I am at my parent's house right now, typing away and watching "Most Haunted" like the big loser I am (me go out with friends? Me? nah! They're probably *both* busy tonight...that's a whole 'nother Private entry...)
And I see that he called a few minutes ago, undoubtedly to tell me that one of his friends sent him a text message about a gathering somewhere, or an invitation to play video games or whatever, and that he's going out and will be back at X time and he's so sorry he made me leave the house. Which is bullshit, because no one but my own bitchy ass made me go out tonight. When I get angry (whether the reasons are rational or not, as with tonight) words come out of my mouth faster than my brain can even process them. It's terrible. The only thought I have is, "JESUS, I can't believe I just SAID that!" I don't call names or swear or anything like that, but I have a rare talent for instinctively finding each person's rawest nerve and exposing it in two observations or less. Again, a completely effed up, unhealthy, destructive and cruel defense mechanism of mine that I developed from who-knows-where from who-knows-why. *crawls into hole*
As if I weren't feeling shitty enough (aren't we all, after reading this terrible entry?) I just learned that my favorite aunt's brother in law drowned a few days ago after saving two of his friends that fell into the water on a fishing trip. I knew him, and his wife, and their son who is my cousin's age. Christ, what a way to go. So sad.
Good news...good news? Can I think of any? ...Well, the weather's supposed to be nice this weekend. That's good news.
Jim lost his job. He was in the process of being trained for a supervisor position. He was the most well-liked, well-respected senior in the store. Several people, mostly those that worked under him, quit when they heard he was fired. Not that that does anyone any good.
He works at a store, a store which we happened to go shopping at two Saturdays ago (not his store, but a different location of the same chain.) When we went to pay. Jim gave the cashier his employee number to receive his employee discount. But we put it on my debit card. I didn't know, and he didn't even think about it. We didn't even realize it until that Monday, when his manager approached him about it. For all the world, it (apparently) looks like we were trying to abuse his employee discount by using his number while I was paying. Honest to God, it was a mistake. It was quarter to ten at night, we had been shopping all day and were dead tired, and he just didn't think about it when I swiped my card (I was closer to the card reader, by the way - that is why I paid with my card.) Monday afternoon, after Jim had called me from work, I rished home to get the merchandise and the receipt, and went back to the store explaining what happened. I had the cashier return all the merchandise and then charge me full price for all of it. Thursday night I stayed up til 1AM helping Jim write a letter to be faxed to his superiors regarding his error, how much he enjoyed and valued his job, etc. Predictably, that did nothing. "Abusing" an employee discount is grounds for firing, and apparently it doesn't matter if you do it buying a flat screen TV or a 99 cent candy bar. He was fired over a $33.47 sale.
Sooooooo, things have been tense. He's sitting at home trying to look for jobs and straighted out unemployment, and apparently having waaay too much time to mull things over (most notably "How the world is fucking him over", to quote him.) I'd be bitter too, and upset, and all of that. I feel terrible beyond words, and am very angry at the store. But I can only be around the extreme negativity for so long before it leaves a nasty mark on me and I start acting that way, too. I do not react well to upset people. If someone is angry about something, I get angry, too. Even when Jim watches football games and started getting really pissed off and yelling, well, I get angry too - at him. Well, tonight there was a hockey game and my stupid weirdo defective nerves completely frazzled out after two hours of "SHOOT it!"s and "What the FUCK?"s and etc. I have no idea why I get angry at things that aren't even directed at me. Maybe it's a completely effed-up defense mechanism or something. I've always been this way ever since I was little and you can imagine all of the interesting situations I made worse with my reactions. At any rate, it's best for everyone if I leave for a little while when I get like that. I do it calmly and I try to make it clear that I am not leaving because I'm mad at someone - tI don't ever elaborate why, as that would make me sound like a crazy person ("I can't handle people getting really angry and yelling, even if it's at the TV! OK, see you later, I'm off to the loony bin!") I just say that I just need to get out for a bit. So I am at my parent's house right now, typing away and watching "Most Haunted" like the big loser I am (me go out with friends? Me? nah! They're probably *both* busy tonight...that's a whole 'nother Private entry...)
And I see that he called a few minutes ago, undoubtedly to tell me that one of his friends sent him a text message about a gathering somewhere, or an invitation to play video games or whatever, and that he's going out and will be back at X time and he's so sorry he made me leave the house. Which is bullshit, because no one but my own bitchy ass made me go out tonight. When I get angry (whether the reasons are rational or not, as with tonight) words come out of my mouth faster than my brain can even process them. It's terrible. The only thought I have is, "JESUS, I can't believe I just SAID that!" I don't call names or swear or anything like that, but I have a rare talent for instinctively finding each person's rawest nerve and exposing it in two observations or less. Again, a completely effed up, unhealthy, destructive and cruel defense mechanism of mine that I developed from who-knows-where from who-knows-why. *crawls into hole*
As if I weren't feeling shitty enough (aren't we all, after reading this terrible entry?) I just learned that my favorite aunt's brother in law drowned a few days ago after saving two of his friends that fell into the water on a fishing trip. I knew him, and his wife, and their son who is my cousin's age. Christ, what a way to go. So sad.
Good news...good news? Can I think of any? ...Well, the weather's supposed to be nice this weekend. That's good news.