Redefining Moments
Title: Redefining Moments
Prompt: Burns
Medium: Fic
Rating: PG
Warnings: Injury, Hospitalization.
Summary: Kris's three-month-old Kaleb, is hospitalized with a compromised airway, and Kris calls Adam from the waiting room. Adam, who was recently burned, offers perspective and comfort. (Set in the Love Speaks Through... universe.)
Pain was a constant for Adam now. And as much as he had hated the humid Costa Rican weather and how it aggravated his burns, he would have preferred it to what he had now.
He had sent his mom home. He'd sent everyone away. And then Kris called to tell him that Little Bird baby, Kaleb was totally freaking out and had to have some weird airway surgery, because he couldn't breathe. Adam couldn't shake the tone of Kris's voice when he called the first time.
"I tried to get his mouth open, but I couldn't, and I didn't want to hurt him. God, I'm still shaking. Is this how it felt like for you, with Emilio? This helpless feeling?" Kris asked from the waiting room of the hospital where he and Katy were waiting to hear how Kaleb did in surgery.
"Yeah. Kind of," Adam admitted. "Except Emilio wasn't my kid. And I've got proof of that day to stare at all day, every day."
"So will I," Kris answered, his voice hollow. "Just a different kind. That trach's gonna be in until they decide he doesn't need it. We don't know yet if he's got brain damage, or what."
Adam closed his mouth. He got the point. There was no point in comparing suffering. His burns versus Kris's baby? It didn't matter. Both had endured a kind of loss. Each would wear his own kind of scar.
"You need me? I can get my mom back, ask her to drive me," Adam offered, only half-joking. Three months out, and his burned hand still wouldn’t allow him to drive, without being in pure, unadulterated agony.
"Nah, we'll be okay," Kris sighed, not sounding okay at all.
"You won't," Adam countered, not judging, just knowing from experience.
"No, we won't. But we'll make it."
--
"He made it," Kris reported again, hours later, and Adam cheered, alone in his empty apartment.
"Way to go, kid! You kick that throat surgery's ass!" he whooped.
And for the first time all day, Adam heard Kris crack a smile. “That’s my Kaleb.”
“So, what happens now?” Adam quizzed, curious.
“Long hospitalization, from the sounds of things. They’ve got to make sure he recovers okay and, probably, that Katy and I know how to maintain his new hardware and stuff.”
“Oh, my God. I don’t have to right? Ever? I couldn’t.” Adam managed, terrified at the mere thought of holding a baby’s life in his hands again.
“Nah, you don’t have to. But you should baby sit for us someday. Once we move out to LA.”
“You’re moving here? Shut the hell up!” Adam crowed, delighted. “Tell Kaleb to get better like, now. I need a familiar face out here.”
“You know everybody out there.” Kris pointed out.
“I know, but somebody who was there,” Adam elaborated and Kris understood. He needed the same thing. No one in Arkansas had been in Costa Rica with the guest house burning. No one else had known the fear Kris fought with every so often, remembering, and not knowing if Adam would come out.
“Okay. So, hey, I gotta let you go. They’re gonna let us see Kaleb in a minute.”
“Hey, Kris?” Adam managed, in the seconds before Kris hung up.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t shut Katy out.”
“And?” Kris prompted, knowing there was more. He wasn't surprised by just how well Adam knew him.
“This isn’t your fault,” Adam told him quietly.
He knew because Kris had told Adam the same thing a week ago. A thing could mark you, but you didn’t have to let it define who you were as a man. Adam’s burns could mean hero or loser. Kaleb’s trach could mean a failure...
But it also could be a daily reminder of how much a father loved his son.