[FIC] Death Note; "Hakanai"; for p1fl
Title: Hakanai ("Fleeting")
Fandom: Death Note
Rating: R for sexuality, but not explicit.
Request: Original Request here.
Warning: Spoilers for Death Note.
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Too quiet meant boring; he had already built and destroyed his puzzles, his structures of Legos, and Whammy House seemed too empty without L eating cake anymore.
Back then, we at least knew what we could do. We solved puzzles. What do we do now, L?
Matt, however, had stayed; Whammy House was his home. He had nowhere else to go - his mind was sharp but not detective-sharp. Could he solve unsolvable cases? No.
Near almost pitied him.
But then again, what were they to do?
We're the same now, aren't we, you and I.
Matt would stay close, quietly making sure that Mello had his chocolate bars (for some reason Mello preferred Hershey's, it must have been the American influence), and that Near had his toys. Transformers kits, Lego blocks. They would all be placed in boxes, under desks or in corners, easy for them to get to when they needed to do something.
He needed to do something.
Near understood this need - he needed to do something too.
But what?
"Why do you do this?" Near asked him, even though he understood why.
Matt just looked at him, surprised and blank. "...because I can," was his only answer.
Near tugged at his shirt.
Another surprised look. "What are you doing, Near?"
If you're the same as me, that means I can touch you. Equations, logic, rules.
"It's something to do."
"Does it have to be my shirt?"
"...no."
Matt looked into his eyes, as if trying to find an answer, as Near played with the buttons, with the feel of skin and cloth. But he made no sign of resistance or dislike, just a quiet confusion.
Weren't we told that feelings were a hindrance to our minds? Mello, for example...
But this was nice, and the rough feel of skin and hair was a texture that Near was unfamiliar with. Intriguing. New.
L, did you? Did you break that rule, even once?
Muscles and skin and body fat, hardness and softness.
Matt would be here. That was reassuring.
L. We settled your memory, but what would you have wanted? Who did you want to be with?
But how fleeting was it all?
After all, things like this - impulses, feelings, instincts - were what they had now that the use for their minds was gone.
Fandom: Death Note
Rating: R for sexuality, but not explicit.
Request: Original Request here.
Warning: Spoilers for Death Note.
=
=
Too quiet meant boring; he had already built and destroyed his puzzles, his structures of Legos, and Whammy House seemed too empty without L eating cake anymore.
Back then, we at least knew what we could do. We solved puzzles. What do we do now, L?
Matt, however, had stayed; Whammy House was his home. He had nowhere else to go - his mind was sharp but not detective-sharp. Could he solve unsolvable cases? No.
Near almost pitied him.
But then again, what were they to do?
We're the same now, aren't we, you and I.
Matt would stay close, quietly making sure that Mello had his chocolate bars (for some reason Mello preferred Hershey's, it must have been the American influence), and that Near had his toys. Transformers kits, Lego blocks. They would all be placed in boxes, under desks or in corners, easy for them to get to when they needed to do something.
He needed to do something.
Near understood this need - he needed to do something too.
But what?
"Why do you do this?" Near asked him, even though he understood why.
Matt just looked at him, surprised and blank. "...because I can," was his only answer.
Near tugged at his shirt.
Another surprised look. "What are you doing, Near?"
If you're the same as me, that means I can touch you. Equations, logic, rules.
"It's something to do."
"Does it have to be my shirt?"
"...no."
Matt looked into his eyes, as if trying to find an answer, as Near played with the buttons, with the feel of skin and cloth. But he made no sign of resistance or dislike, just a quiet confusion.
Weren't we told that feelings were a hindrance to our minds? Mello, for example...
But this was nice, and the rough feel of skin and hair was a texture that Near was unfamiliar with. Intriguing. New.
L, did you? Did you break that rule, even once?
Muscles and skin and body fat, hardness and softness.
Matt would be here. That was reassuring.
L. We settled your memory, but what would you have wanted? Who did you want to be with?
But how fleeting was it all?
After all, things like this - impulses, feelings, instincts - were what they had now that the use for their minds was gone.