The Phantom (Menace / Hair) Limb
OMG, I was totally just checking out the page of a hottie and the title of her latest blog was "Phantom Limb" and it Totally reminded me of a section of my dreams last night.
I'm semi-obsessed with hair. I'm really into your hair, I really miss my hair.
I'm pretty sure it was JUST after vanquishing Darth Vader (the first time) and just BEFORE my dinner party. I was getting myself ready. I went to the bathroom and took off my skullcap / beanie. Lo and behold (is "lo" short for "HELLO!"?) I find a full head of hair. Mine. a bit unkempt from being under the beanie, but definitely my curlie jams. I couldn't believe it! I couldn't wait to show everyone at work. But first there was the dinner party. That'd be cool too, but only like 6 people were coming to that. I ran my hands through my hair. Some of it fell away (WTF!?) but most of it stayed. Still, I had full coverage (sounds like an insurance plan, doesn't it? My hair is / was like that.) and I couldn't have been happier. In fact this was the beginning of the Return of (the Jedi) The Old Me as The New Me (my personality is like that).
Then Vader showed up, fucked my shit up, then I fucked his shit up, my guests left, dinner party a shambles, I woke up bald. Still.
Ain't that a bitch?
So yeah...my hair is my phantom limb. I dream about it's return frequently. Not that my hair was like Medusa's and could actually do stuff, y'know writhe and freak people out. I just like me with hair. Hair means options. Hair means people don't look at you funny when you buy shampoo. Hair means someone ELSE can run their hands through it, thrilling you to no end. Actually, people wanting to rub my scruffy-bald head is kind of thrilling, but I'd bet the percentages who want to run fingers through hair is significantly higher than those who want to simulate polishing a bowling ball.
You understand.
I'm semi-obsessed with hair. I'm really into your hair, I really miss my hair.
I'm pretty sure it was JUST after vanquishing Darth Vader (the first time) and just BEFORE my dinner party. I was getting myself ready. I went to the bathroom and took off my skullcap / beanie. Lo and behold (is "lo" short for "HELLO!"?) I find a full head of hair. Mine. a bit unkempt from being under the beanie, but definitely my curlie jams. I couldn't believe it! I couldn't wait to show everyone at work. But first there was the dinner party. That'd be cool too, but only like 6 people were coming to that. I ran my hands through my hair. Some of it fell away (WTF!?) but most of it stayed. Still, I had full coverage (sounds like an insurance plan, doesn't it? My hair is / was like that.) and I couldn't have been happier. In fact this was the beginning of the Return of (the Jedi) The Old Me as The New Me (my personality is like that).
Then Vader showed up, fucked my shit up, then I fucked his shit up, my guests left, dinner party a shambles, I woke up bald. Still.
Ain't that a bitch?
So yeah...my hair is my phantom limb. I dream about it's return frequently. Not that my hair was like Medusa's and could actually do stuff, y'know writhe and freak people out. I just like me with hair. Hair means options. Hair means people don't look at you funny when you buy shampoo. Hair means someone ELSE can run their hands through it, thrilling you to no end. Actually, people wanting to rub my scruffy-bald head is kind of thrilling, but I'd bet the percentages who want to run fingers through hair is significantly higher than those who want to simulate polishing a bowling ball.
You understand.