"No Exit" Firefly Fic for ff_friday PRIDE challenge
Challenge: Pride
Title: No Exit
Author: Alizarin (alizarin_nyc)
Spoilers: none
Pairing: Mal/Jayne, hints of Mal/Simon and Jayne/Simon
Rating: NC-17
Notes: Written for jackchain
Summary: Jayne’s got no way out, but he’s not getting off the ship.
“You little bitch!”
River darted down the corridor, her bare feet making a slup-slup sound on Serenity’s metal flooring, and Jayne hurtled after her in furious pursuit. She screeched like a banshee, and the high-pitched sound hurt Jayne’s ears. Damn she was fast.
Jayne came careening around the corner and into full contact with Mal’s fist, which slammed up into his gut and exploded out his head like fire from a comet. He fell flat, and his ears rang with the sound of River’s laughter.
When he came to, Simon was checking his ribs for breaks and Jayne cursed him and his damn fool of a sister using as many vulgar terms as he could possibly come up with. So Simon discharged him without any pain killers.
Mal cornered Jayne in his quarters and just stood with his arms crossed in front of him, drilling his beady eyes into Jayne.
“Thanks for that Mal,” Jayne said, wincing carefully toward his bruised ribs.
“Bu xie,” Mal said easily. Then he smiled like he was about to make some trouble. “You’ll apologize to me, to River and to Simon, or we’re going to have some trouble between us.”
Jayne chuckled. He’d give up Vera before he’d do any such thing. “Apologize. Hell. Sorry ain’t in my vocabulary, Mal.”
“I think I just heard it come out of your mouth. I’ll not have this nonsense aboard my ship. River’s just a girl. Simon’s your medic. I’m your captain. You will apologize to each of us, in turn.”
“I’m the one with the busted ribcage, if you hadn’t noticed.”
“I’m advisin’ you to do as I say. Then things’ll get back to normal right quick around here. We all want to move on. Now’s the time.”
“Wo ting nide,” Jayne slurred, the pain beginning to make him feel dull and irritable. He nodded and shoved his resentment toward Mal way down deep.
“You damn well better take my advice.” Mal turned and climbed up the ladder. “This is it, Jayne, I’ve had enough. Gou ma.” He banged the hatch shut behind him.
Jayne slept for a good long while and then he went to see the doc. Figured he was owed some pain killers, whether they were best pals or not. Simon was standing with his back to the door, dressed in one of his little dark vests and white shirts, his hair combed back off his forehead. Jayne hated the fact that he was so neat. He hated those stupid vests, the red-tinted glasses and the man’s tendency to roll up his sleeves every time he had a patient.
But truth be told, he really couldn’t explain why he hated the doc so much. But he did, he surely did. And the revved-up little sis wasn’t high on his list either. Every time she got in his way, he wanted to pick her up and throw her across the room. And he wanted to do it to hurt Simon. Simon never gave him an outright reason to get violent, but when River pulled at the frayed edges of his temper, it was all too easy to give in and unravel.
“Hey, I’m sorry I picked on your little sis, doc,” Jayne said before he could think about it.
“Um.” Simon was peering at him intently, in that confused way he had. “That’s okay,” he said slowly, unsure. “Her presence here is hard on all the crew, I know that.”
“Well, you don’t need me addin’ to the trouble.” This was much easier than Jayne had anticipated. Much easier. And something new began to form in the back of his mind.
“Doc, could you look at my ribs again? They’re mighty painful and feel like shit.”
“Sure, Jayne. I’ll give you some pain killers too, if you’d like.”
“Now we’re talkin’!” Jayne pulled off his shirt, taking his time with it. His ribs hurt, sure, but he wanted Simon to enjoy the show. He laid down on the exam table and let Simon examine him, but this time he lay supine and relaxed, whereas his normal behavior was anything but. He let his breath go heavy when Simon touched him.
“Does it hurt that much?” Simon asked, concerned. “I don’t feel any breaks but there’s likely to be a lot of bruising. Let me get you the pain pills.”
“Thanks doc. Your sister around, too? I’d like to make amends if I might.”
“Jayne, you’re acting quite chivalrous. Are you sure Mal didn’t hit you in the head?”
Simon was looking at Jayne gently now, smiling, totally buying the act from stem to stern. Jayne chuckled in response, thinking about what it might be like to rip the white shirt off of Simon’s body and bend him over his own examining table.
Jayne gripped Simon’s arm. “Thanks for helpin’ me out, doc, means a lot.” And as luck would have it, Mal walked right in as Jayne and Simon were clasping each other’s forearms and grinning sheepishly at each other. Couldn’t have been more perfect.
Jayne held on to Simon for much longer than was necessary, even after Mal had cleared his throat and Simon had flushed and tried to turn away. There were many telling signs Jayne had seen over the months that indicated something was going on between these two that wasn’t natural, and he was seeing it now. He didn’t think anything had happened, but he was sure that Simon wanted it to, and that Mal might not be opposed. The thought of it made him extremely uncomfortable. He’d never admit it, but Mal was his captain, his friend, and the thought of this little lily-white snake coming between them was a hard one to bear.
“Just telling Simon here, I’d like to see his sister,” Jayne said amicably, meeting Mal’s eyes, which were still trained on Simon.
“Just saw her down in dining,” Mal said. “Hurry up you can catch her.”
“Just take these, Jayne, and I really hope you heal up fast,” Simon said, handing him several little blue packets, more than Jayne had ever managed to wheedle from anyone. He’d have a fine sleep tonight.
He whistled as he walked to the mess, wondering what kind of uncomfortable discussion Mal and Simon were having. He’d love to see the look on Mal’s face when Simon told him Jayne had been a right good little boy for the doc.
“Hey River,” he said, interrupting the girl as she sat on the counter top, counting out beans that she’d emptied from a storage container. “Ni hao ma?”
“Twos,” River replied. “Three makes a mess. Four even worse.”
“You’re gorram right about that,” Jayne said, not having a clue what she meant. “Listen, I wanted to say sorry for the other day, when I was chasin’ you. That wasn’t right. You made me mad, but I cain’t go on threatening you every time you do.”
“That is most gracious, kind sir, but I assure you, totally unnecessary.” River spoke in a British accent, like the one she’d used on Badger. It was kind of creepy and Jayne stilled himself.
“So we’re good then?”
River giggled. Before Jayne could turn away she began to speak again, twirling a can of beans in her hands. “Unnecessary to be sorry until there’s a good bloody reason.”
“Wha?” Jayne stood with his mouth half-open.
“You don’t know just how sorry you’ll be. And you’ll be very sorry.” River began to move the beans about, conducting little mathematical games with them, separating them out into twos and into star-shaped variations to match the sky. Her voice was low and taunting, her accent gone and a child’s voice in its place. “You’ll be sorry, you’ll be sorry…”
Jayne stood staring at her, bug-eyed, then thought better of smashing her skull in with the can of beans. He’d gone and done what he’d gone there to do. That was enough, had to be enough for Mal.
“He doesn’t love you, you know,” River said to Jayne’s retreating back.
“You tryin’ to cause some big trouble xiao feng le? Who you talkin’ about?”
“Cap’n loves me and Simon. Doesn’t love you. Going to leave you on a rock very soon.” Her face made a little heart-shaped picture of disdain. “Going to make you very, very sorry you ever met us.”
Jayne felt his tied-back temper melt and surge up like lava in his throat. “Little bitch!” He lunged for her, but she was quick and ducked behind the counter, scattering beans as she went. “C’mere. We’re going to have a real talk now.” He scooted across the counter and yanked her up by her arm, just as she was ducking around the other side to sneak out behind him. A stray limb, and he’d just barely grasped it, but now that he had her he closed his fist around the small arm like a vise.
“Going to teach you a gorram lesson,” he hissed into her ear. She started to scream in the high pitched voice of her terror, but Jayne anticipated that this time and stuffed a dishrag in her mouth, pulling both her wrists together behind her. Her hair, wild and whipping, lashed his face and her booted feet kicked madly. “Just like a horse needs to be trained. Ain’t nobody going to help you now, not if they don’t know we’re having our little lesson.”
He pulled her out into the gangway, intending to haul her to cargo and then… well, he didn’t really know what he was going to do, but he was fired up for something. Mal would kill him, that’s for gorram sure, but now he’d started, he couldn’t very well stop, now could he? She’d said he was going to be left on some rock, betrayed, abandoned. He couldn’t let that happen and right now he really believed River could make it happen or not happen.
He dragged her down the stairwell and was so caught up in the fury of the moment that he failed to see Mal standing at the bottom.
“Zao gao, Mal, I… this is… look, I have to do this…”
“I don’t want to hear it.” Mal’s voice was clipped and professional.
“Mal, you gotta listen to--”
“Neng bu neng bu shuo hua!” Mal cut him off. “I’ll do the talking now. Just couldn’t make a simple apology, had to turn it nasty, huh?”
“Wasn’t me turned it nasty, Mal, you know it. This girl’s trouble; all week this has been goin’ on, ain’t nobody bothered to hear my side of the story.” Jayne wound his hand in River’s hair and tugged it tight.
“I don’t give a fuck about your side of the story.”
“Well somebody’s got to, and if it has to be me, it has to be me,” Jayne shouted. River squirmed in his grip. “I ain’t leaving Serenity until I’m good and ready, and if you’re going to throw me offa here without a pot to piss in, I won’t let it happen without a fight, dong ma?”
“Let the girl go, Jayne.” Mal’s voice was low and calm and Jayne released River’s hands and hair and shoved her up the stairs away from him.
She spat out the gag and ran up the stairs, yelling, “You’ll be sorry, you’ll be sorry, now!”
“There, you happy now?”
“Happy, yeah, thrilled.” And Mal leapt lightning fast on Jayne, hauling him out to the middle of the cargo bay and punched him hard in the mouth. Jayne spit blood and glared at Mal, not making a move.
“You want to get thrown off my boat, keep doing what you’re doing.”
“I’m not doing it, Mal, it’s that witch!”
Mal swung again, clocking Jayne on the side of the head. Jayne saw stars for a split second before he charged Mal, grabbing him around the waist and shoving back. Mal let his knees bend and threw Jayne off him sideways, so that Jayne skidded around facing the other way, just in time for Mal to sweep his unsteady feet out from under him and knock him flat on his face.
“Pride goeth before a fall, Jayne. Man’s been saying that for centuries. It’s a lesson you need to learn.”
Jayne rolled over and Mal’s boot thumped down right on his chest. He stared up, gasping. “Let me up Mal.”
Surprisingly Mal did, and Jayne got to his knees but found he didn’t have the strength to stand. He was breathing hard as he looked up at Mal, his face cast into shadow by the bay lights behind him. Jayne’s rib cage was seared with fiery pain and he wanted nothing more than for Mal to offer him his hand and help him up.
But Mal would never do that. And Jayne realized, as much as he was a proud man, Mal was far prouder; his pride was the most dangerous thing on the ship. Jayne’s hands trembled and he shuffled closer to Mal, still on his knees. He was scared. Scared of Mal and what Mal would do once he hardened his heart. He wanted to gain Mal’s forgiveness; he realized this was what he wanted more than anything in the ‘verse.
He put his hand on Mal’s belt. Mal just looked at him, breathing heavily from the scuffle, but didn’t flinch. Jayne pulled on the belt and Mal stepped closer.
“Jayne,” he warned.
Jayne pulled the belt loose, reached for Mal’s zipper. “Let me. Let me,” he said. He kept his eyes on Mal’s face, but it was completely unreadable. He brought the zipper down and eased Mal’s cock out, half-hard. He felt his own erection strain against his trousers. Mal didn’t stop him, so he did what he thought he ought to do.
Jayne came long before Mal, rubbing the front of his trousers with one hand as he licked, and as soon as he came, Mal reached for his head and pulled it down, forcing himself deeper into Jayne’s mouth. Jayne felt humiliated, his knees rubbing raw against the floor, his pants wet, his mouth aching and bloody, and Mal pushing him down, not letting him look up and see his face.
Mal finally came, silent except for his breathing and then pushed Jayne’s head away from him.
Jayne’s eyes watered, his heart was pounding hard and mad and his ribs felt like they were going to squeeze his lungs from his chest. “Gou ma?” He panted, “Gou ma, Mal? Enough? We good?” God, he really had no pride.
“Bu gou,” Mal said, zipping himself up and staring down at Jayne with disgust. “Bu gou.”
Not enough. Not yet.
Title: No Exit
Author: Alizarin (alizarin_nyc)
Spoilers: none
Pairing: Mal/Jayne, hints of Mal/Simon and Jayne/Simon
Rating: NC-17
Notes: Written for jackchain
Summary: Jayne’s got no way out, but he’s not getting off the ship.
“You little bitch!”
River darted down the corridor, her bare feet making a slup-slup sound on Serenity’s metal flooring, and Jayne hurtled after her in furious pursuit. She screeched like a banshee, and the high-pitched sound hurt Jayne’s ears. Damn she was fast.
Jayne came careening around the corner and into full contact with Mal’s fist, which slammed up into his gut and exploded out his head like fire from a comet. He fell flat, and his ears rang with the sound of River’s laughter.
When he came to, Simon was checking his ribs for breaks and Jayne cursed him and his damn fool of a sister using as many vulgar terms as he could possibly come up with. So Simon discharged him without any pain killers.
Mal cornered Jayne in his quarters and just stood with his arms crossed in front of him, drilling his beady eyes into Jayne.
“Thanks for that Mal,” Jayne said, wincing carefully toward his bruised ribs.
“Bu xie,” Mal said easily. Then he smiled like he was about to make some trouble. “You’ll apologize to me, to River and to Simon, or we’re going to have some trouble between us.”
Jayne chuckled. He’d give up Vera before he’d do any such thing. “Apologize. Hell. Sorry ain’t in my vocabulary, Mal.”
“I think I just heard it come out of your mouth. I’ll not have this nonsense aboard my ship. River’s just a girl. Simon’s your medic. I’m your captain. You will apologize to each of us, in turn.”
“I’m the one with the busted ribcage, if you hadn’t noticed.”
“I’m advisin’ you to do as I say. Then things’ll get back to normal right quick around here. We all want to move on. Now’s the time.”
“Wo ting nide,” Jayne slurred, the pain beginning to make him feel dull and irritable. He nodded and shoved his resentment toward Mal way down deep.
“You damn well better take my advice.” Mal turned and climbed up the ladder. “This is it, Jayne, I’ve had enough. Gou ma.” He banged the hatch shut behind him.
Jayne slept for a good long while and then he went to see the doc. Figured he was owed some pain killers, whether they were best pals or not. Simon was standing with his back to the door, dressed in one of his little dark vests and white shirts, his hair combed back off his forehead. Jayne hated the fact that he was so neat. He hated those stupid vests, the red-tinted glasses and the man’s tendency to roll up his sleeves every time he had a patient.
But truth be told, he really couldn’t explain why he hated the doc so much. But he did, he surely did. And the revved-up little sis wasn’t high on his list either. Every time she got in his way, he wanted to pick her up and throw her across the room. And he wanted to do it to hurt Simon. Simon never gave him an outright reason to get violent, but when River pulled at the frayed edges of his temper, it was all too easy to give in and unravel.
“Hey, I’m sorry I picked on your little sis, doc,” Jayne said before he could think about it.
“Um.” Simon was peering at him intently, in that confused way he had. “That’s okay,” he said slowly, unsure. “Her presence here is hard on all the crew, I know that.”
“Well, you don’t need me addin’ to the trouble.” This was much easier than Jayne had anticipated. Much easier. And something new began to form in the back of his mind.
“Doc, could you look at my ribs again? They’re mighty painful and feel like shit.”
“Sure, Jayne. I’ll give you some pain killers too, if you’d like.”
“Now we’re talkin’!” Jayne pulled off his shirt, taking his time with it. His ribs hurt, sure, but he wanted Simon to enjoy the show. He laid down on the exam table and let Simon examine him, but this time he lay supine and relaxed, whereas his normal behavior was anything but. He let his breath go heavy when Simon touched him.
“Does it hurt that much?” Simon asked, concerned. “I don’t feel any breaks but there’s likely to be a lot of bruising. Let me get you the pain pills.”
“Thanks doc. Your sister around, too? I’d like to make amends if I might.”
“Jayne, you’re acting quite chivalrous. Are you sure Mal didn’t hit you in the head?”
Simon was looking at Jayne gently now, smiling, totally buying the act from stem to stern. Jayne chuckled in response, thinking about what it might be like to rip the white shirt off of Simon’s body and bend him over his own examining table.
Jayne gripped Simon’s arm. “Thanks for helpin’ me out, doc, means a lot.” And as luck would have it, Mal walked right in as Jayne and Simon were clasping each other’s forearms and grinning sheepishly at each other. Couldn’t have been more perfect.
Jayne held on to Simon for much longer than was necessary, even after Mal had cleared his throat and Simon had flushed and tried to turn away. There were many telling signs Jayne had seen over the months that indicated something was going on between these two that wasn’t natural, and he was seeing it now. He didn’t think anything had happened, but he was sure that Simon wanted it to, and that Mal might not be opposed. The thought of it made him extremely uncomfortable. He’d never admit it, but Mal was his captain, his friend, and the thought of this little lily-white snake coming between them was a hard one to bear.
“Just telling Simon here, I’d like to see his sister,” Jayne said amicably, meeting Mal’s eyes, which were still trained on Simon.
“Just saw her down in dining,” Mal said. “Hurry up you can catch her.”
“Just take these, Jayne, and I really hope you heal up fast,” Simon said, handing him several little blue packets, more than Jayne had ever managed to wheedle from anyone. He’d have a fine sleep tonight.
He whistled as he walked to the mess, wondering what kind of uncomfortable discussion Mal and Simon were having. He’d love to see the look on Mal’s face when Simon told him Jayne had been a right good little boy for the doc.
“Hey River,” he said, interrupting the girl as she sat on the counter top, counting out beans that she’d emptied from a storage container. “Ni hao ma?”
“Twos,” River replied. “Three makes a mess. Four even worse.”
“You’re gorram right about that,” Jayne said, not having a clue what she meant. “Listen, I wanted to say sorry for the other day, when I was chasin’ you. That wasn’t right. You made me mad, but I cain’t go on threatening you every time you do.”
“That is most gracious, kind sir, but I assure you, totally unnecessary.” River spoke in a British accent, like the one she’d used on Badger. It was kind of creepy and Jayne stilled himself.
“So we’re good then?”
River giggled. Before Jayne could turn away she began to speak again, twirling a can of beans in her hands. “Unnecessary to be sorry until there’s a good bloody reason.”
“Wha?” Jayne stood with his mouth half-open.
“You don’t know just how sorry you’ll be. And you’ll be very sorry.” River began to move the beans about, conducting little mathematical games with them, separating them out into twos and into star-shaped variations to match the sky. Her voice was low and taunting, her accent gone and a child’s voice in its place. “You’ll be sorry, you’ll be sorry…”
Jayne stood staring at her, bug-eyed, then thought better of smashing her skull in with the can of beans. He’d gone and done what he’d gone there to do. That was enough, had to be enough for Mal.
“He doesn’t love you, you know,” River said to Jayne’s retreating back.
“You tryin’ to cause some big trouble xiao feng le? Who you talkin’ about?”
“Cap’n loves me and Simon. Doesn’t love you. Going to leave you on a rock very soon.” Her face made a little heart-shaped picture of disdain. “Going to make you very, very sorry you ever met us.”
Jayne felt his tied-back temper melt and surge up like lava in his throat. “Little bitch!” He lunged for her, but she was quick and ducked behind the counter, scattering beans as she went. “C’mere. We’re going to have a real talk now.” He scooted across the counter and yanked her up by her arm, just as she was ducking around the other side to sneak out behind him. A stray limb, and he’d just barely grasped it, but now that he had her he closed his fist around the small arm like a vise.
“Going to teach you a gorram lesson,” he hissed into her ear. She started to scream in the high pitched voice of her terror, but Jayne anticipated that this time and stuffed a dishrag in her mouth, pulling both her wrists together behind her. Her hair, wild and whipping, lashed his face and her booted feet kicked madly. “Just like a horse needs to be trained. Ain’t nobody going to help you now, not if they don’t know we’re having our little lesson.”
He pulled her out into the gangway, intending to haul her to cargo and then… well, he didn’t really know what he was going to do, but he was fired up for something. Mal would kill him, that’s for gorram sure, but now he’d started, he couldn’t very well stop, now could he? She’d said he was going to be left on some rock, betrayed, abandoned. He couldn’t let that happen and right now he really believed River could make it happen or not happen.
He dragged her down the stairwell and was so caught up in the fury of the moment that he failed to see Mal standing at the bottom.
“Zao gao, Mal, I… this is… look, I have to do this…”
“I don’t want to hear it.” Mal’s voice was clipped and professional.
“Mal, you gotta listen to--”
“Neng bu neng bu shuo hua!” Mal cut him off. “I’ll do the talking now. Just couldn’t make a simple apology, had to turn it nasty, huh?”
“Wasn’t me turned it nasty, Mal, you know it. This girl’s trouble; all week this has been goin’ on, ain’t nobody bothered to hear my side of the story.” Jayne wound his hand in River’s hair and tugged it tight.
“I don’t give a fuck about your side of the story.”
“Well somebody’s got to, and if it has to be me, it has to be me,” Jayne shouted. River squirmed in his grip. “I ain’t leaving Serenity until I’m good and ready, and if you’re going to throw me offa here without a pot to piss in, I won’t let it happen without a fight, dong ma?”
“Let the girl go, Jayne.” Mal’s voice was low and calm and Jayne released River’s hands and hair and shoved her up the stairs away from him.
She spat out the gag and ran up the stairs, yelling, “You’ll be sorry, you’ll be sorry, now!”
“There, you happy now?”
“Happy, yeah, thrilled.” And Mal leapt lightning fast on Jayne, hauling him out to the middle of the cargo bay and punched him hard in the mouth. Jayne spit blood and glared at Mal, not making a move.
“You want to get thrown off my boat, keep doing what you’re doing.”
“I’m not doing it, Mal, it’s that witch!”
Mal swung again, clocking Jayne on the side of the head. Jayne saw stars for a split second before he charged Mal, grabbing him around the waist and shoving back. Mal let his knees bend and threw Jayne off him sideways, so that Jayne skidded around facing the other way, just in time for Mal to sweep his unsteady feet out from under him and knock him flat on his face.
“Pride goeth before a fall, Jayne. Man’s been saying that for centuries. It’s a lesson you need to learn.”
Jayne rolled over and Mal’s boot thumped down right on his chest. He stared up, gasping. “Let me up Mal.”
Surprisingly Mal did, and Jayne got to his knees but found he didn’t have the strength to stand. He was breathing hard as he looked up at Mal, his face cast into shadow by the bay lights behind him. Jayne’s rib cage was seared with fiery pain and he wanted nothing more than for Mal to offer him his hand and help him up.
But Mal would never do that. And Jayne realized, as much as he was a proud man, Mal was far prouder; his pride was the most dangerous thing on the ship. Jayne’s hands trembled and he shuffled closer to Mal, still on his knees. He was scared. Scared of Mal and what Mal would do once he hardened his heart. He wanted to gain Mal’s forgiveness; he realized this was what he wanted more than anything in the ‘verse.
He put his hand on Mal’s belt. Mal just looked at him, breathing heavily from the scuffle, but didn’t flinch. Jayne pulled on the belt and Mal stepped closer.
“Jayne,” he warned.
Jayne pulled the belt loose, reached for Mal’s zipper. “Let me. Let me,” he said. He kept his eyes on Mal’s face, but it was completely unreadable. He brought the zipper down and eased Mal’s cock out, half-hard. He felt his own erection strain against his trousers. Mal didn’t stop him, so he did what he thought he ought to do.
Jayne came long before Mal, rubbing the front of his trousers with one hand as he licked, and as soon as he came, Mal reached for his head and pulled it down, forcing himself deeper into Jayne’s mouth. Jayne felt humiliated, his knees rubbing raw against the floor, his pants wet, his mouth aching and bloody, and Mal pushing him down, not letting him look up and see his face.
Mal finally came, silent except for his breathing and then pushed Jayne’s head away from him.
Jayne’s eyes watered, his heart was pounding hard and mad and his ribs felt like they were going to squeeze his lungs from his chest. “Gou ma?” He panted, “Gou ma, Mal? Enough? We good?” God, he really had no pride.
“Bu gou,” Mal said, zipping himself up and staring down at Jayne with disgust. “Bu gou.”
Not enough. Not yet.