Felis Takes Boston, part 3
Mum wakes me up at 8 to tell me she's going to her conference. "You just sleep, dear." Well, I was sleeping before you woke me up. *sighs* Try to sleep again but nope, won't happen. Turn on TV. Flip, flip. Some documentary on Discovery about a couple who got stuck up in the snowy mountains of SomeplaceIcantrememberwhatscalled with a tiny baby. Well, I can't not watch that! Everyone is freezing, snow snow everywhere. Oh, the baby stopped crying. Is it dead? Is it? Is it? A tiny wailing. I wipe my tears and stifle my sob. *ponders calling home* *remembers no one is home anyway* Finally they are safe and well. Chop off a few toes but the baby is fine. *happy sigh*
Take a shower, go down and eat breakfast. Up again and fetch coat and backpack. Stop by lobby. No laptop. Okay, getting itty bitty freaked now. Try not to think about it. Obsess. Stop it!
Walk to mall. Walk in mall. Everything still closed.
Walk, walk, walk...
Finally they open.
Yeah, not really in my price range, people. Look but don't buy. Nice kitty stuff on that stand though. Like those socks. Maybe later. Barnes and Noble's. BtVS and Angel books. Once Bitten. I miss my dead gay show. Some card shop. Gay wedding cards!! Dude, that is so cool! Tiny little grooms! Tiny little brides! Hell, I'm so gonna make a fortune stealing this idea when they finally legalize them here. I mean, we have unions, just not weddings. I want weddings! *designs cheesy wedding cards in head*
Tired feet. Walk down Newbury street to check where I'm meeting Bunny and Chicken later. Walk on. And on. Park. Squirrels. I stop and call to one. It comes running and stands up, tiny little paws on my hand. It tickles. Sadly I don't have anything this time either. Another squirrel flees from selfish women snacking on a bench shooing at it and to me who it decides looks more charitable. Man, that is the fattest squirrel I ever saw. Don't think you need more, my chubby friend. Old woman smiles at us. "That is one fat squirrel." You said it, sister. My much much older and totally unrelated American sister.
Macy's. Fuck, it's big. And it's got really, really hard floors. Ow.
More stores. Still nothing for the x-mas list. Should eat something. At least get a coffee. Starbucks is full. More stores. Really should eat something. More stores. Buy shoes.
Tired. Go back to hotel. No laptop. Ok, it's freak-out time.
Call Apple store. Wait on phone. Boring song. "Hello, my name is Chanelle, please give me your order number." I do. "Just a minute. Please give your billing name and address." Check e-mail in hand. No address. "Ok, see the thing is. I have the name but not the billing address because she bought it for me and I don't have her address. But I have the address it was supposed to be delivered to." "Please give me the billing address, miss." "Well, I don't have the billing address." "I need the billing address, miss." "Look, I just need to know if it's on its way or if there's a problem because..." "I need the billing address for that, miss." Well, screw you. "Ok, I'll find the address and call again then." Cow. "Thank you, and once again my name is Chanelle and thank you for calling the Apple store." Blow it up your arse, Chanelle. "Thank you."
Fuck.
Read e-mail again. Aha! ely_jan's phone numbers! Try the first one. Some woman answers. "Can I talk to..." How the hell do I pronounce that? "...Eli-sa?" "This is she." "Hey! It's Felis. Felisblanco from LJ!" "Oh, thank god!"
Yep, they screwed up my order. Poor Ely has been cursing them all day after she found out, threatening their bollocks and other parts with serious injury over the phone. Dynamite up their arses sounds good to me. The only solution is to send it to her and then she sends it to me, marked as gift and hoping it will not be taxed. I'm not very optimistic about that, I know of dads that have sent their kids x-mas gifts and the kids have to pay to get them out of customs. Stupid taxfreaks. But hey, not much we can do. Poor Ely is feeling bad but it's not her fault as I repeatedly tell her. Apple arseholes are to blame.
Ok, now I have an image of Angel shoving apples up Spike's bum. I blame deborahmm for that particular one.
Must go because I'm gonna be late for my meeting with the girls. Blow kisses to Ely over the phone and run out.
Tealuxe. Down stairs. Curly hair peeks around the corner with a big smile. Bunny! Hiding behind her hair is her own personal Chicken. We hug, we kiss, we make out squee. It's you! It's really you! We are real people, not just a string of 110101010101! Look at us! (A cat, a rabbit and a hen walk into a bar tea salon...)
We get a table. One million different kinds of tea. I contemplate asking for coffee but order berry tea (which they point out is not tea, just water with berries) and marsala chicken sandwish. I give them the puffin snowglobe. Cute little birdies. Taste delicious too. If you ever come here I will get you some. We talk about Boston, LJ and porn. The people at the next table look intrigued.
I blabber hyperactive like I tend to do. Blahblahblahblahblah!!!1!!11! They don't look too scared... Is that a stun gun Bunny's hiding behind her back? No, just a phone. Picture time! You know, I actually had great hair this morning and make up and everything. All blown away by the Boston wind.
See?
Me, chicken_cem and bunnyohare.
After sandwish we get pie. Pecan pie, pumpkin pie (my first taste of that) and some other sweet pie I can't remember what was called. What was it again, Bunny? Anyway, all tasted good. Yummy pie with yummy tea.
Oh and I have to mention the love. Much love there between those two. Cuddly, cute, special love. Makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside. Made me miss my own little love pumpkin. I mean hubby this time, not the kids. Well, I missed them too. *sniffs*
Anyway, more talking. Lube and sex toys and the possibility of buying Studs 'n Spurs for mum. Finish eating. I talk so much I don't even notice Bunny paying the bill until after. Ooops. We stroll along Newbury and then to the mall looking for the Godiva store. Not at this end. Not at that end. How many ends does this mall have? Wait! I smell chocolate! There it is!
Yummy, yummy chocolate. Bunny tries to convince me they're for x-mas. Ten minutes later we're halfway through the bag. lol
Oh no. It's almost five and mum is gonna think I've fallen into the clutches of internet perverts and am handcuffed to a bed in some lesbian brothel if I'm not back in time. Much hugging and kissing and some more hugging and trying to figure out which way to go and a final hugging session and then I have to leave.
Arrive at hotel and mum is already there. Not looking worried at all. Drinking whiskey and watching TV. Again. I tell her my laptop woes and she tells me no way it will ever get through customs without the tax. Suddenly I feel really blue and have a huge lump in my throat. Why did I do this stupid thing? I couldn't afford it to begin with and now it will cost even more and I feel really bad for spending all this money on me and... fuck. Mum tells me to stop worry about it, there's nothing I can do anyway.
We go out again, walk downtown and mum decides it's upper floor Filine time for her. Mum browses while I call hubby on my cell phone. Explain the whole laptop thing to him, feeling horrible and start crying in the kids' department. Surrounded by ugly clothes (why are there hardly any nice clothes for boys?) I sob and try to find a spot where the connection doesn't flicker while he tells me everything is all right and stop worrying and go have some nice coffee and don't let this ruin your trip. And I sob that I miss him so damn much, that I hate having to take care of stuff by myself and mum will never let me take a break for coffee because she's shop crazy and I'm going to be the world's first fatality by x-mas shopping.
Sniffing we say goodbye and I go and find mum who's been politely staying away, pretending not to notice the whole drama queen act. I buy clothes for my girl, a little pouch purse thing for me because I'm tired of having quarters falling out of my pockets all the time.
Me: I want to have coffee.
Mum: We only just started!
Me: I know, but...
Mum: Let's finish this store first.
Two hours later I am limping, my backpack is stuffed with stuff and I still haven't had any coffee. We leave Filine's but go straight into Macy's. Ok, then. Who needs coffee anyway? It's soon time for dinner anyway.
Me: Mum, dinner?
Mum: Soon.
Almost ten o'clock we finally sit down to eat. Real steak this time. Breadsticks while we wait. Mum has beer. I have a coke. Ok, I asked for a coke but got a big glass filled with icecubes and tiny trickles of coke in between. I try drinking it as fast as I can but by the time I'm 1/3 down it just tastes of water. Waiter comes and asks me if I want another one. "Yes, please. This time with less ice so I can actually taste the coke? That would be great." He looks embarrassed but smiles and nods. "Sure."
Mum: Everything ok?
Me: Yeah. Just... tired.
Mum: You're not having fun?
Me: Yes, I am. It's great. I'm just very tired and hungry. *lip wobble*
Food arrives. Very good.
Mum: You need planning.
Me: Ok.
She lists all kind of stuff I can buy for people. I'm too tired to remember anything for more than five minutes. So I just nod and say yeah and ok.
We go back to the hotel with our purchases. Feet dead. Just chop them off, please.
Mum: I don't get it. My feet don't hurt at all.
Me: So who's the freak, you or me? (Ok, I didn't say that. I thought it. I also thought 'Just say I'm fat and out of shape and be done with it'.)
My mood is broody.
We drink alcohol and watch TV. Catch the end of Wedding Singer. Billy Idol smirking and Adam Sandler singing 'I wanna grow old with you'. Miss hubby. Realise this might not be the best song for a newly divorced woman. Flip. Tired. Switch off TV, read for a bit and say good night.
Try not to cry into my pillow. Feel miserable. I need my man. Sleep.
Tomorrow Saturday.
[ETA. Sorry. Pic was way big. All fixed now.]