Fic: Closer VII: My Absence Of Faith
Sorry I'm so late. I started reading it over and it didn't feel quite right so I've been re-writing some small parts. Anyway, here it is.
Same old, same old. AU human, angst and stuff. Earlier parts are here.
Closer VII: My Absence Of Faith
The pills slid down his throat and he leaned back on the pillows, his hand throbbing in its icy confinement. The light hurt his eyes and he threw his good arm over them. He could hear Liam pulling the curtains for the window, not that it mattered; it would be dark soon enough.
“I’ll leave so you can turn off the lights.” Liam’s voice was still subdued, unsure. Sad. Shameful.
“Wait. I’m…” Will hesitated. God, he felt stupid. “You don’t have to go. If you don’t want to.” The darkness underneath his shaking arm was oddly comforting.
Silence.
“You want me to stay?”
Will squeezed his eyes even tighter together. “I mean, it’s up to you, if you don’t want to…”
Fuck it.
“Yes.” He swallowed. “Please.”
Silence.
“Ok.”
There was a moment of awkward silence and then he heard Liam move around and the bed dipped beneath him. They lay side by side, their breathing sounding loud and unsettling in the quiet room. Slowly the ache faded away and after a while Will opened his eyes, slightly surprised by the bright light in the room. When he turned his head he found Liam lying stiff by his side, staring up at the ceiling.
“What time is it?”
Liam blinked. “Seven. I think.”
“Oh.” He frowned. “A bit early for bed maybe.” He rubbed his temples. “Don’t know why I thought it was night.”
“It’s seven A.M.”
“What? Fuck.” He sat up, wincing at the sting at the back of his neck, and looked around blearily. They were both fully dressed on top of the covers, the sun was doing its best to try and shine through the heavy curtains and his mouth was dry and tasted like carpet. The cold wrapping had been removed from his hand sometime during the night. It was slightly blue but the ache was mostly gone as well as the swelling. He looked over at Liam. He was lying on the edge of the bed, pale and drawn with dark circles under his eyes. Funny how someone could look like shit and still be beautiful. He swallowed. “You been here all night?”
“Yeah.” Liam glanced up, a guarded look in his eyes. “You asked me to, right?”
“Right.” He paused. “You didn’t sleep? You look like a zombie.”
Liam slowly sat up, like moving hurt after lying in the same position all night. He rubbed his face with the palm of his right hand before standing up. “Didn’t get much sleep, no. Got things on my mind.”
Will sat still, looking up at the tall and tired man in his wrinkled silk shirt and probably boiling hot leather pants as he walked slowly into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. Fuck.
He got up and started pacing the room, ignoring the dull headache that was slowly increasing. What the fuck were they doing? They were like cats and dogs. No really. He was the scared little kitten that still wanted to be petted but couldn’t decide whether he should purr or hiss. Liam was the puppy, begging for approval, waiting to be forgiven for biting his master’s leg. When he wasn’t humping said leg, that was.
Groaning with frustration Will walked over to the window and drew back the curtains. The bright sun and the annoyingly cheerful birds did nothing to lighten his mood. This would never work. He’d been stupid to think they could start over again. Every time Liam touched him he didn’t know whether to kiss him or curl up and cry. He hated this turmoil of feelings inside, he felt like in a way he’d lost himself, lost who he was supposed to be and it terrified him that he might never find that person again.
“You feeling better?”
He hadn’t heard the bathroom door open so the soft voice made him jump and swirl around in his usual paranoid fashion. The hurt and guilt in Liam’s eyes made him feel awful. “Sorry, you just startled me. Yes, I’m fine. Thank you.”
Liam bit his lip. “Right. Whatever. I’m gonna go take a shower in my room. We’re not meeting the family until noon anyway.” He turned around and for a moment Will contemplated letting him just leave. Wouldn’t it be for the best? Shouldn’t he…?
“Liam.” He hesitantly touched Liam’s elbow, then let his arm fall limp by his side, head bowed. “Really, thank you. For staying here with me. I haven’t slept this soundly in…” He paused. “Anyway, thank you.”
Liam didn’t look back. “You’re welcome.” He reached for the door and suddenly Will had a vision of him never coming back, leaving him to be all alone for the rest of his life.
“Liam!” Don’t leave. Please don’t leave. I can’t do this alone. “I do want you, it’s just…” He swallowed. “I’m all fucked up. Please don’t… don’t give up on me.”
Liam turned around slowly. He hesitated for a moment but then he took one step forward and suddenly Will was pressed against his chest, strong arms pulling him close. He squeezed his eyes shut, biting his lip to shut down the sob.
“I won’t. I promise. And you’re not the only one fucked up.” Will could feel him breathing against his neck. “I need this. You’re helping me just as much as I’m helping you. More even.” He sighed. “Maybe we should take things slower. Wait a few days.”
“Maybe.” Will wrapped his arms tighter around Liam’s waist, the silk shirt smooth against his cheek; leather pants warm under his fingers. He breathed in Liam’s heat, wishing he could soak it in straight from the skin.
Waiting was good. Waiting was sensible and smart and… God, he wanted to rip Liam’s clothes off and throw him on the bed and fuck him so hard he wouldn’t be able to walk for days! His body shivered and Liam pulled him closer. “Sshh, it’s ok.”
No. It wasn’t. He wasn’t.
Breathing deeply, he pushed his sick thoughts back inside.
When they finally broke apart the tension was gone and they smiled sheepishly at each other.
“Shower…”
“Yeah.” Will took a step back. “Me too.” He hesitated. “Maybe we can take a look at your shots after? Unless you want to take a nap…”
“No. Sure, we can do that. Just… come over when you’re ready. And bring your laptop.” Liam gave him a quick smile and then left for his own room.
~~~~~
“Liam, these are…” Will stared at the screen as the pictures were revealed one after another. “Fuck, you’re a bloody artist.” He glanced quickly at Liam who was watching him nervously before turning back to the wonders in front of him. “I had no idea you were this good. Why the bloody hell are you working for a shit like Giles when you have beauty like this to sell?”
Liam shrugged but he looked pleased. “Beauty doesn’t pay bills.”
“Fuck it doesn’t. Beauty rules the capitalistic world, my friend. You just need the right contacts and I bet you’d be living in a mansion within a year.”
Liam snorted but Will could tell he was flattered. He clicked on the next and stilled. It was the kiss from the church. Reaching out he slowly traced the tears running down the young mans cheek, disappearing between the touching lips. His profile hid the bruises that had covered the left side of the boy’s face, making it look like he was sleeping.
“I hoped you had captured that. God, it’s so horribly beautiful.” His hand dropped down on his lap and he suddenly felt old and tired. They sat in silence, staring at the couple on the screen. “You know,” Will finally whispered, “what you said in the car, about who would come to your funeral if you died? It made me think of my own death and I realised it would be exactly like yours. Alone. No family, no friends. No one.” He looked up at Liam who was watching him uncertainly. “What happened to us? Why is our life like that? Worthless. Why are we even still here if we make no impact, have no purpose?”
“Will…”
“No, seriously.” He closed his eyes. His head was starting to hurt again. “I could die today and no one would even notice. My mother would probably wonder a few Christmases from now why she hasn’t had a card but otherwise…”
“Giles would notice. He’d probably have an aneurysm when you didn’t turn in your story.”
Will smiled sarcastically. “Well, at least my death would count for something then.”
“I’d notice.”
Will rolled his eyes. “Well, yeah. Because we happen to be working together right this moment. But a month ago you wouldn’t have had a clue.”
Liam sat in silence for a long time before answering. “I would have noticed your lights weren’t turned on.”
“What?” Will stared at Liam who kept his eyes down, cheeks flushed red. “Are you saying…? Have you been stalking me?”
“No!” Liam blushed and squirmed. “I wasn’t stalking, I just, you know, walked by every now and then, hoping I’d see you. I wanted to see if you were ok and…” Seeing the look on Will’s face he blushed even further. “Maybe I stalked you just a little.”
Will felt cold. He remembered all the times he’d hurried out to the corner shop to buy his daily ration of alcohol and fags, looking over his shoulder like a scared rabbit. Thinking someone was watching him and then telling himself he was paranoid. God, what must he have looked like to Liam? Some days he’d hardly even got dressed, just scampered over in his jammies, unshaven and still smelling of last night’s sweaty nightmare, too desperate for his fix to care about appearances. Not like anyone looked at him anyway.
Except someone had.
He closed the laptop and got slowly off the bed where they had been sitting. It was one thing having told Liam about his pathetic life, it was quite another knowing he’d been watching him, had seen what a shitty bum he was.
“Will…”
“Shut up. Please, just… don’t say anything.”
He ran the palm of his hand over his face. It was clammy and trembling and he stuffed both his hands in the pockets of his jeans to hide them. Drink. He really needed a drink. “You watched me?”
“Just a couple of times.” His gaze dropped again when Will glared at him. “Or maybe ten. I know I shouldn’t have, I just… I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t stop thinking about you but I didn’t dare approach you. Not after what happened.”
“So you watched me. Like what you saw? Find it funny, watching your pathetic prey, seeing what a fucking loser I’d become?” His arms were pulling up, fists drawn.
Liam moved to stand up but another glare from Will made him sit back, defeated. “I didn’t see anything like that. All I saw was you. And you were beautiful.”
Will opened his mouth to spit out some bitter retort, preferably followed by a punch, but the earnest look in Liam’s eyes made him pause. He blinked. “You really mean that.”
“Yes.”
“I was…”
“You still are.”
Will stood still and then turned to stare at himself in the small mirror on the wall. His skin was pale, his bleached hair grown out into a two-toned jungle of curls, his cheekbones were even more prominent than before. His blue eyes seemed huge in the thin face, shadowed by dark circles. He knew that underneath the clothes he was too skinny, too pale, too… ugly. Slowly he shook his head. “No. I’m not.”
He turned reluctantly as Liam took his hand and pulled him towards him. Sitting on the bed Liam wrapped his arms around Will’s thin body and buried his face in his belly. Then he looked up, his eyes dark. “You’re too thin and you could use about a month’s sleep but you’re still the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.” He pulled up the thin t-shirt and kissed Will’s smooth stomach. “So beautiful.” Fingers running over his back. “So sexy.” Kisses raining over his abdomen. “Never wanted a man like I want you.” He tipped his head and stared up at Will in adoration. “William.”
Will’s breath hitched and he ran his fingers through the dark hair brushing his belly. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
The kiss was hesitant at first but when Liam parted his lips Will followed, welcoming the warm tongue into his mouth. As the kiss deepened Will’s fingers entangled in Liam’s hair, drawing him closer. Then he was falling forward, twisting, until he landed on his back on the bed with Liam towering over him. The old fear tried to burst forward but he pushed it back. Liam’s heavy body was pressing down on him and he let it, suddenly wanting despite everything to feel owned again. To feel safe. When Liam grabbed his wrists and pulled them over his head he didn’t fight back but bucked up, moaning.
Liam suddenly froze and raised his head, gasping for breath. “Fuck. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to take over like that.” He started to pull away but Will bucked up again, grinding their groins together.
“No. Don’t stop.” He stretched his neck and kissed Liam hard. “I want you to…” He closed his eyes for a moment before continuing. “I need it. Please.”
Liam still hesitated but Will could see the lust burning in his eyes. “You sure? Because I’ll stop if…”
Will kissed him again then looked him straight into the eye. “Rape. That’s the safe word.”
Liam swallowed. “Ok.”
His kisses were timid at first but Will’s moans and thrusts soon impassioned him. He pinned Will’s wrists together with one hand while the other moved down and worked on the jeans, finally getting the buttons undone. When his hand slipped inside Will jerked up into the warm hand on his cock. “Fuck, Liam, yes.” He wriggled until his hips were more or less free of the jeans as well as the boxers and one tug from Liam helped his cock free.
“Like this?” Liam swallowed and started stroking him. “Tell me what you want, Will.”
“Want you. Want you to…” Will stared up at him, his eyes dark with desperation. “Kiss me, Liam. Kiss me and touch me and… please, fix me. Please.”
Liam stared back then nodded. He bowed down and kissed Will with closed lips before parting them and slipping his tongue inside. He let go of Will’s cock, moving his hands up to either side of his head as he lowered his body and rubbed his jeans clad erection against it instead. Then he moved down and pulled Will’s t-shirt up again, kissing his way down to his waist and then lower still.
As the hot lips touched the head of his cock Will sobbed and braided his trembling fingers into Liam’s hair. God, it felt good. Finally feeling again another man’s touch, tongue and, oh my god, mouth. He could feel his walls of fear crumbling as he gave himself over to the man who’d brought on their construction all those months ago. He had forgotten it could be so good… no, he was pretty sure it had never been this good. He was whimpering and moaning and when Liam pushed up his legs and hesitantly touched his entrance with the tip of his tongue he started begging in a pained voice ‘Please, please. Oh god, Liam… please.”
Liam hesitated only for a second. Then he started licking him over and over until the soft massage made the muscle relax and with a push his tongue slipped inside. It couldn’t have been more different than the last time he was penetrated. Liam’s tongue was smooth and wet, licking the inside of his walls, prodding him, pushing as deep as he could. Will writhed and whimpered, his whole being giving in to the overwhelming pleasure. It was happening too fast, was too much, but he didn’t care. He could feel his orgasm building up in his balls, begging to be released and when Liam’s slick fingers wrapped around his cock he only needed a few tugs before coming with a cry, his seed spilling over his stomach and Liam’s hand. Riding the waves of orgasm he threw his arm over his wet face, his limp hand slipping from Liam’s hair and down on the bed. He could feel Liam kissing the inside of his thighs again and again, then moving up his stomach and chest before kissing him lightly on the lips. His breath was still heaving, his thighs trembling and he didn’t know whether he wanted to laugh or cry.
“Are you all right? Will?”
He nodded, still not able to speak. He could feel Liam lie down beside him and then he was pulled into a warm embrace and the blanket thrown over him. Too exhausted to think he fell asleep.
I haven't had time to reply to feedback today and now I have to eat something or I will die a very painful death. One piece of toast and couple of Swedish kanel giffler do not sustain a slasher for a whole day. I'll get to it though but I might not manage to do them all tonight. *hugs you all hard*
Continued in Help Me Become Somebody Else
Same old, same old. AU human, angst and stuff. Earlier parts are here.
Closer VII: My Absence Of Faith
The pills slid down his throat and he leaned back on the pillows, his hand throbbing in its icy confinement. The light hurt his eyes and he threw his good arm over them. He could hear Liam pulling the curtains for the window, not that it mattered; it would be dark soon enough.
“I’ll leave so you can turn off the lights.” Liam’s voice was still subdued, unsure. Sad. Shameful.
“Wait. I’m…” Will hesitated. God, he felt stupid. “You don’t have to go. If you don’t want to.” The darkness underneath his shaking arm was oddly comforting.
Silence.
“You want me to stay?”
Will squeezed his eyes even tighter together. “I mean, it’s up to you, if you don’t want to…”
Fuck it.
“Yes.” He swallowed. “Please.”
Silence.
“Ok.”
There was a moment of awkward silence and then he heard Liam move around and the bed dipped beneath him. They lay side by side, their breathing sounding loud and unsettling in the quiet room. Slowly the ache faded away and after a while Will opened his eyes, slightly surprised by the bright light in the room. When he turned his head he found Liam lying stiff by his side, staring up at the ceiling.
“What time is it?”
Liam blinked. “Seven. I think.”
“Oh.” He frowned. “A bit early for bed maybe.” He rubbed his temples. “Don’t know why I thought it was night.”
“It’s seven A.M.”
“What? Fuck.” He sat up, wincing at the sting at the back of his neck, and looked around blearily. They were both fully dressed on top of the covers, the sun was doing its best to try and shine through the heavy curtains and his mouth was dry and tasted like carpet. The cold wrapping had been removed from his hand sometime during the night. It was slightly blue but the ache was mostly gone as well as the swelling. He looked over at Liam. He was lying on the edge of the bed, pale and drawn with dark circles under his eyes. Funny how someone could look like shit and still be beautiful. He swallowed. “You been here all night?”
“Yeah.” Liam glanced up, a guarded look in his eyes. “You asked me to, right?”
“Right.” He paused. “You didn’t sleep? You look like a zombie.”
Liam slowly sat up, like moving hurt after lying in the same position all night. He rubbed his face with the palm of his right hand before standing up. “Didn’t get much sleep, no. Got things on my mind.”
Will sat still, looking up at the tall and tired man in his wrinkled silk shirt and probably boiling hot leather pants as he walked slowly into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. Fuck.
He got up and started pacing the room, ignoring the dull headache that was slowly increasing. What the fuck were they doing? They were like cats and dogs. No really. He was the scared little kitten that still wanted to be petted but couldn’t decide whether he should purr or hiss. Liam was the puppy, begging for approval, waiting to be forgiven for biting his master’s leg. When he wasn’t humping said leg, that was.
Groaning with frustration Will walked over to the window and drew back the curtains. The bright sun and the annoyingly cheerful birds did nothing to lighten his mood. This would never work. He’d been stupid to think they could start over again. Every time Liam touched him he didn’t know whether to kiss him or curl up and cry. He hated this turmoil of feelings inside, he felt like in a way he’d lost himself, lost who he was supposed to be and it terrified him that he might never find that person again.
“You feeling better?”
He hadn’t heard the bathroom door open so the soft voice made him jump and swirl around in his usual paranoid fashion. The hurt and guilt in Liam’s eyes made him feel awful. “Sorry, you just startled me. Yes, I’m fine. Thank you.”
Liam bit his lip. “Right. Whatever. I’m gonna go take a shower in my room. We’re not meeting the family until noon anyway.” He turned around and for a moment Will contemplated letting him just leave. Wouldn’t it be for the best? Shouldn’t he…?
“Liam.” He hesitantly touched Liam’s elbow, then let his arm fall limp by his side, head bowed. “Really, thank you. For staying here with me. I haven’t slept this soundly in…” He paused. “Anyway, thank you.”
Liam didn’t look back. “You’re welcome.” He reached for the door and suddenly Will had a vision of him never coming back, leaving him to be all alone for the rest of his life.
“Liam!” Don’t leave. Please don’t leave. I can’t do this alone. “I do want you, it’s just…” He swallowed. “I’m all fucked up. Please don’t… don’t give up on me.”
Liam turned around slowly. He hesitated for a moment but then he took one step forward and suddenly Will was pressed against his chest, strong arms pulling him close. He squeezed his eyes shut, biting his lip to shut down the sob.
“I won’t. I promise. And you’re not the only one fucked up.” Will could feel him breathing against his neck. “I need this. You’re helping me just as much as I’m helping you. More even.” He sighed. “Maybe we should take things slower. Wait a few days.”
“Maybe.” Will wrapped his arms tighter around Liam’s waist, the silk shirt smooth against his cheek; leather pants warm under his fingers. He breathed in Liam’s heat, wishing he could soak it in straight from the skin.
Waiting was good. Waiting was sensible and smart and… God, he wanted to rip Liam’s clothes off and throw him on the bed and fuck him so hard he wouldn’t be able to walk for days! His body shivered and Liam pulled him closer. “Sshh, it’s ok.”
No. It wasn’t. He wasn’t.
Breathing deeply, he pushed his sick thoughts back inside.
When they finally broke apart the tension was gone and they smiled sheepishly at each other.
“Shower…”
“Yeah.” Will took a step back. “Me too.” He hesitated. “Maybe we can take a look at your shots after? Unless you want to take a nap…”
“No. Sure, we can do that. Just… come over when you’re ready. And bring your laptop.” Liam gave him a quick smile and then left for his own room.
~~~~~
“Liam, these are…” Will stared at the screen as the pictures were revealed one after another. “Fuck, you’re a bloody artist.” He glanced quickly at Liam who was watching him nervously before turning back to the wonders in front of him. “I had no idea you were this good. Why the bloody hell are you working for a shit like Giles when you have beauty like this to sell?”
Liam shrugged but he looked pleased. “Beauty doesn’t pay bills.”
“Fuck it doesn’t. Beauty rules the capitalistic world, my friend. You just need the right contacts and I bet you’d be living in a mansion within a year.”
Liam snorted but Will could tell he was flattered. He clicked on the next and stilled. It was the kiss from the church. Reaching out he slowly traced the tears running down the young mans cheek, disappearing between the touching lips. His profile hid the bruises that had covered the left side of the boy’s face, making it look like he was sleeping.
“I hoped you had captured that. God, it’s so horribly beautiful.” His hand dropped down on his lap and he suddenly felt old and tired. They sat in silence, staring at the couple on the screen. “You know,” Will finally whispered, “what you said in the car, about who would come to your funeral if you died? It made me think of my own death and I realised it would be exactly like yours. Alone. No family, no friends. No one.” He looked up at Liam who was watching him uncertainly. “What happened to us? Why is our life like that? Worthless. Why are we even still here if we make no impact, have no purpose?”
“Will…”
“No, seriously.” He closed his eyes. His head was starting to hurt again. “I could die today and no one would even notice. My mother would probably wonder a few Christmases from now why she hasn’t had a card but otherwise…”
“Giles would notice. He’d probably have an aneurysm when you didn’t turn in your story.”
Will smiled sarcastically. “Well, at least my death would count for something then.”
“I’d notice.”
Will rolled his eyes. “Well, yeah. Because we happen to be working together right this moment. But a month ago you wouldn’t have had a clue.”
Liam sat in silence for a long time before answering. “I would have noticed your lights weren’t turned on.”
“What?” Will stared at Liam who kept his eyes down, cheeks flushed red. “Are you saying…? Have you been stalking me?”
“No!” Liam blushed and squirmed. “I wasn’t stalking, I just, you know, walked by every now and then, hoping I’d see you. I wanted to see if you were ok and…” Seeing the look on Will’s face he blushed even further. “Maybe I stalked you just a little.”
Will felt cold. He remembered all the times he’d hurried out to the corner shop to buy his daily ration of alcohol and fags, looking over his shoulder like a scared rabbit. Thinking someone was watching him and then telling himself he was paranoid. God, what must he have looked like to Liam? Some days he’d hardly even got dressed, just scampered over in his jammies, unshaven and still smelling of last night’s sweaty nightmare, too desperate for his fix to care about appearances. Not like anyone looked at him anyway.
Except someone had.
He closed the laptop and got slowly off the bed where they had been sitting. It was one thing having told Liam about his pathetic life, it was quite another knowing he’d been watching him, had seen what a shitty bum he was.
“Will…”
“Shut up. Please, just… don’t say anything.”
He ran the palm of his hand over his face. It was clammy and trembling and he stuffed both his hands in the pockets of his jeans to hide them. Drink. He really needed a drink. “You watched me?”
“Just a couple of times.” His gaze dropped again when Will glared at him. “Or maybe ten. I know I shouldn’t have, I just… I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t stop thinking about you but I didn’t dare approach you. Not after what happened.”
“So you watched me. Like what you saw? Find it funny, watching your pathetic prey, seeing what a fucking loser I’d become?” His arms were pulling up, fists drawn.
Liam moved to stand up but another glare from Will made him sit back, defeated. “I didn’t see anything like that. All I saw was you. And you were beautiful.”
Will opened his mouth to spit out some bitter retort, preferably followed by a punch, but the earnest look in Liam’s eyes made him pause. He blinked. “You really mean that.”
“Yes.”
“I was…”
“You still are.”
Will stood still and then turned to stare at himself in the small mirror on the wall. His skin was pale, his bleached hair grown out into a two-toned jungle of curls, his cheekbones were even more prominent than before. His blue eyes seemed huge in the thin face, shadowed by dark circles. He knew that underneath the clothes he was too skinny, too pale, too… ugly. Slowly he shook his head. “No. I’m not.”
He turned reluctantly as Liam took his hand and pulled him towards him. Sitting on the bed Liam wrapped his arms around Will’s thin body and buried his face in his belly. Then he looked up, his eyes dark. “You’re too thin and you could use about a month’s sleep but you’re still the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.” He pulled up the thin t-shirt and kissed Will’s smooth stomach. “So beautiful.” Fingers running over his back. “So sexy.” Kisses raining over his abdomen. “Never wanted a man like I want you.” He tipped his head and stared up at Will in adoration. “William.”
Will’s breath hitched and he ran his fingers through the dark hair brushing his belly. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
The kiss was hesitant at first but when Liam parted his lips Will followed, welcoming the warm tongue into his mouth. As the kiss deepened Will’s fingers entangled in Liam’s hair, drawing him closer. Then he was falling forward, twisting, until he landed on his back on the bed with Liam towering over him. The old fear tried to burst forward but he pushed it back. Liam’s heavy body was pressing down on him and he let it, suddenly wanting despite everything to feel owned again. To feel safe. When Liam grabbed his wrists and pulled them over his head he didn’t fight back but bucked up, moaning.
Liam suddenly froze and raised his head, gasping for breath. “Fuck. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to take over like that.” He started to pull away but Will bucked up again, grinding their groins together.
“No. Don’t stop.” He stretched his neck and kissed Liam hard. “I want you to…” He closed his eyes for a moment before continuing. “I need it. Please.”
Liam still hesitated but Will could see the lust burning in his eyes. “You sure? Because I’ll stop if…”
Will kissed him again then looked him straight into the eye. “Rape. That’s the safe word.”
Liam swallowed. “Ok.”
His kisses were timid at first but Will’s moans and thrusts soon impassioned him. He pinned Will’s wrists together with one hand while the other moved down and worked on the jeans, finally getting the buttons undone. When his hand slipped inside Will jerked up into the warm hand on his cock. “Fuck, Liam, yes.” He wriggled until his hips were more or less free of the jeans as well as the boxers and one tug from Liam helped his cock free.
“Like this?” Liam swallowed and started stroking him. “Tell me what you want, Will.”
“Want you. Want you to…” Will stared up at him, his eyes dark with desperation. “Kiss me, Liam. Kiss me and touch me and… please, fix me. Please.”
Liam stared back then nodded. He bowed down and kissed Will with closed lips before parting them and slipping his tongue inside. He let go of Will’s cock, moving his hands up to either side of his head as he lowered his body and rubbed his jeans clad erection against it instead. Then he moved down and pulled Will’s t-shirt up again, kissing his way down to his waist and then lower still.
As the hot lips touched the head of his cock Will sobbed and braided his trembling fingers into Liam’s hair. God, it felt good. Finally feeling again another man’s touch, tongue and, oh my god, mouth. He could feel his walls of fear crumbling as he gave himself over to the man who’d brought on their construction all those months ago. He had forgotten it could be so good… no, he was pretty sure it had never been this good. He was whimpering and moaning and when Liam pushed up his legs and hesitantly touched his entrance with the tip of his tongue he started begging in a pained voice ‘Please, please. Oh god, Liam… please.”
Liam hesitated only for a second. Then he started licking him over and over until the soft massage made the muscle relax and with a push his tongue slipped inside. It couldn’t have been more different than the last time he was penetrated. Liam’s tongue was smooth and wet, licking the inside of his walls, prodding him, pushing as deep as he could. Will writhed and whimpered, his whole being giving in to the overwhelming pleasure. It was happening too fast, was too much, but he didn’t care. He could feel his orgasm building up in his balls, begging to be released and when Liam’s slick fingers wrapped around his cock he only needed a few tugs before coming with a cry, his seed spilling over his stomach and Liam’s hand. Riding the waves of orgasm he threw his arm over his wet face, his limp hand slipping from Liam’s hair and down on the bed. He could feel Liam kissing the inside of his thighs again and again, then moving up his stomach and chest before kissing him lightly on the lips. His breath was still heaving, his thighs trembling and he didn’t know whether he wanted to laugh or cry.
“Are you all right? Will?”
He nodded, still not able to speak. He could feel Liam lie down beside him and then he was pulled into a warm embrace and the blanket thrown over him. Too exhausted to think he fell asleep.
I haven't had time to reply to feedback today and now I have to eat something or I will die a very painful death. One piece of toast and couple of Swedish kanel giffler do not sustain a slasher for a whole day. I'll get to it though but I might not manage to do them all tonight. *hugs you all hard*
Continued in Help Me Become Somebody Else