(no subject)
Oops, I keep doing this disappearing act, again and again. Not on purpose, I swear. I think there must have been a time disturbance or something because August only started like three days ago and now it's the 21st. That can't be normal.
I'm having a weird day. I couldn't sleep last night, took various medications before I finally dozed off at around 6 am this morning. Woke up again around noon and have been a zombie ever since. Stumbled into bed around 3 pm for a short nap and slept for an hour and a half. Took a shower, made myself some coffee ( by now 5 pm) and sat down to waste the rest of the day in front of the computer. So tired that when I realised I'd forgotten to put on my glasses I just let it be. Only to discover 20 minutes later, when they slipped down my nose, that I actually did have them on. I honestly can't remember if I got up to get them or not. I don't think so, I think I'm just that tired.
Two of my classmates are having a combined book launch tonight as it's with the same publisher. That makes it the tenth and eleventh book to come from someone in my group (not counting the two collections we did ourselves) in the last 18 months. Or, like my daughter keeps asking, "Is everyone having their books published but you?" That, and not getting any of the grants I applied for this spring, is having a serious effect on my self-esteem. I feel old, over the hill, done for. All ideas already used up. *despairs*
I know this will pass, it always does. I just really hope it does it before I run out of time doing my MA thesis. I'm working on my 6th idea now and they're all pretty boring. Stupid thing is, it only needs to be 60 pages. If it was a fun fanfic I could probably write that in a week.
Also, still mourning that house I wanted to buy. Which is so stupid because I don't even really want it, I just really want the garden and the work shed and the porch. The house itself would be too small, needs way too much fixing up and cost too much in maintenance. Still... No. Stop it! *sighs* I just wish they'd take it off the market already so I can stop thinking about it.
Kids starting school tomorrow. I still have until September 2nd. I didn't do any of the stuff I planned to do this summer, not writing wise or for the apartment. This place is slowly turning into a dump. There are things we need to decide upon and work together on changing/fixing and hubby is never home so we don't. I told him at the start of summer, if we just clean everything really well together I'll maintain it during the summer and fix stuff that needs fixing. Of course we never did a proper clean up which means it just keeps getting worse and it feels more and more overwhelming so I give up on getting started. I'm having a bad summer health wise (achy, achy, achy, all over) and I'm supposed to be writing anyway. Which means when I'm writing I feel bad about the apartment and when I'm tidying up the apartment I feel bad for not writing. It's a vicious circle. *sighs*
Or to quote Calvin:
I'm having a weird day. I couldn't sleep last night, took various medications before I finally dozed off at around 6 am this morning. Woke up again around noon and have been a zombie ever since. Stumbled into bed around 3 pm for a short nap and slept for an hour and a half. Took a shower, made myself some coffee ( by now 5 pm) and sat down to waste the rest of the day in front of the computer. So tired that when I realised I'd forgotten to put on my glasses I just let it be. Only to discover 20 minutes later, when they slipped down my nose, that I actually did have them on. I honestly can't remember if I got up to get them or not. I don't think so, I think I'm just that tired.
Two of my classmates are having a combined book launch tonight as it's with the same publisher. That makes it the tenth and eleventh book to come from someone in my group (not counting the two collections we did ourselves) in the last 18 months. Or, like my daughter keeps asking, "Is everyone having their books published but you?" That, and not getting any of the grants I applied for this spring, is having a serious effect on my self-esteem. I feel old, over the hill, done for. All ideas already used up. *despairs*
I know this will pass, it always does. I just really hope it does it before I run out of time doing my MA thesis. I'm working on my 6th idea now and they're all pretty boring. Stupid thing is, it only needs to be 60 pages. If it was a fun fanfic I could probably write that in a week.
Also, still mourning that house I wanted to buy. Which is so stupid because I don't even really want it, I just really want the garden and the work shed and the porch. The house itself would be too small, needs way too much fixing up and cost too much in maintenance. Still... No. Stop it! *sighs* I just wish they'd take it off the market already so I can stop thinking about it.
Kids starting school tomorrow. I still have until September 2nd. I didn't do any of the stuff I planned to do this summer, not writing wise or for the apartment. This place is slowly turning into a dump. There are things we need to decide upon and work together on changing/fixing and hubby is never home so we don't. I told him at the start of summer, if we just clean everything really well together I'll maintain it during the summer and fix stuff that needs fixing. Of course we never did a proper clean up which means it just keeps getting worse and it feels more and more overwhelming so I give up on getting started. I'm having a bad summer health wise (achy, achy, achy, all over) and I'm supposed to be writing anyway. Which means when I'm writing I feel bad about the apartment and when I'm tidying up the apartment I feel bad for not writing. It's a vicious circle. *sighs*
Or to quote Calvin: