#17 Television and Memories
PARKS AND RECREATION
Remember that time I went on a tour of NBC studios and I failed to say the SNL catchphrase correctly? Man, that was good times. But after the tour was over, we were directed straight into the gift store (of course we were), where everyone went into a consumerist frenzy; like piranhas on fresh meat.
The NBC studio gift store is a popular place -- not only was it filled with tour-goers, but like, regular people off the street could pop in and get some sweet, sweet merchandise from their favourite NBC show, past, present, and fictional. This of course meant that the store was swarming with insane shoppers, which is great for the NBC gift store, but fucking awful for me.
Crowds make me anxious as hell. New York (and for that matter, Sydney) is inherently a crowded city, and since I was there during the holidays, it was even crazier. But I was okay with squeezing through the bodies, because it's easier to do if you know there is a clear endpoint, and being outdoors makes all the difference. But when you're in a crowded store trying to browse and buy, it's infinitely more difficult not to panic; before long, I was hyperventillating in a corner, deciding between a "what the what" or a "blerg" shirt, but really trying not to cry. I love shopping and hate crowds, so it was a difficult time.
At some point while browsing and hyperventilating, I found this excellent "Pawnee Goddesses" shirt, a Parks and Recreation reference (which doesn't seem to be available at the official store anymore, boo!). This shirt symbolises Leslie Knope's passionate drive to educate young girls about their awesomeness and feminism, and the way her passion makes her go insane in the cutest way. There were only a few shirts hanging on the rack, and to my dismay they were all either extra-large, extra-extra large, or extra-small. They did not have size Small, which is what I typically wear. I was devastated; I wanted to be a Pawnee Goddess, damnit!
Kyri was standing next to me at the time, and had put up with my neuroses all day (and for the enitre trip, and pretty much every day we've been together. It is unclear why he is still with me, but I am okay with not questioning it). He told me to just stay very still, and he would be right back. So I stayed where I was, fingering the ill-fitting Pawnee Goddess shirts sadly. But after a while, Kyri had still not come back and my panic!brain resurfaced and I began thinking that maybe Kyri actually said "I will meet you at the counter", so I wandered over there, but I did not see him. I started browsing the sections nearby, of old NBC shows I had no interest in. I still couldn't see Kyri anywhere, and I was starting to feel like a child lost in a mall, in a crowd, in a foreign country, which was incredibly scary at the time. It sounds very pathetic, I know.
After a while, I started walking around and around the store, tracing and re-tracing my steps, dodging people and occasionally standing on the tips of my toes in an attempt to see over the crowd. Eventually, I bumped into Kyri again. He was holding a small Pawnee Goddess shirt. "I asked a shop attendant if they had any more sizes, and he led me to the back room. I had to really search for it, but look, I found a shirt in Small!" he said.
So even though that entire ordeal was more or less terrifying on my end, finding my exact size Pawnee Goddesses shirt is possibly the most romantic thing anyone could do for me, ever. I wear the shirt when I want to get shit done, or feel extra-powerful.