confusion is next, after that is the truth....
I'm confused. There's no other way to put it. I just don't know what's going on in my life- for the first time, I've had a night where I could actually reflect upon and say "what the hell just happened?" Is it good? I'd like to think so.. but there's a 50% chance that all this craziness is bad, deteremental, pain-ridden and I just don't know it yet. I'm usually good at being in check with my life and surroundings, and for once I'm at a total loss. My actions seem distached from my being, and I'm watching it all in slow motion saying "haha, look at that sucker- she has no clue what she's doing". I could make an endless list of things that make me incredibly happy, and incredibly worried (all specifically referring to a short time period). Aigh. akdfjbdkfb. I want confirmation; I hate being in limbo. Over-analysis is for untalented pretencious movie critics, and hyperly moderate political advisers. Not me. But I can't help it in this case, godammit.