in search of an honest opinion
i am friends with this couple. i've known the guy for a long time, and i got to know the girl after they started dating. they recently got married. a little less than a year later, the girl tells me about this guy that she has a mini crush on--but it's one of those "this person is cool" sort of things, and though i warned her about staying up till 1 am im-ing with a guy that's not her husband, i didn't think anything would come of it. eventually she tells me that their relationship has progressed and that she's having an affair.
1. should i tell the husband?
so, fast forward a few months. in this time, i tell the girl that she has to tell her husband, that she can't just be unhappy with the marriage and make him feel that the marriage isn't working if she's not willing to identify the main factor that's destroying the marriage. then, the husband stumbles across some emails or ims or something and begins to have suspicions. okay. i'm going to be honest. i confirmed his suspicions.
2. was i wrong to tell him?
fast forward a few months. he is incredibly angry, but he's working towards the anger and has forgiven me--he says i should've said something to him earlier, that i should've given the wife an ultimatum, that either she had to tell him or i would.
3. do you think i needed his forgiveness? (was it wrong to have kept it from him)
i really want your honest opinion. i have my own thoughts on the matter, of course, but i want outside opinions. thanks for helping a girl in confusion...
1. should i tell the husband?
so, fast forward a few months. in this time, i tell the girl that she has to tell her husband, that she can't just be unhappy with the marriage and make him feel that the marriage isn't working if she's not willing to identify the main factor that's destroying the marriage. then, the husband stumbles across some emails or ims or something and begins to have suspicions. okay. i'm going to be honest. i confirmed his suspicions.
2. was i wrong to tell him?
fast forward a few months. he is incredibly angry, but he's working towards the anger and has forgiven me--he says i should've said something to him earlier, that i should've given the wife an ultimatum, that either she had to tell him or i would.
3. do you think i needed his forgiveness? (was it wrong to have kept it from him)
i really want your honest opinion. i have my own thoughts on the matter, of course, but i want outside opinions. thanks for helping a girl in confusion...