Chapter 3 [Audio/Commentlog]

[faun_tumnus]

[Tumnus had re-awoken in his room two days prior and he hadn't left until now. It had taken time for the memories to begin to surface again and when they had, the faun could only pray that he was mistaken

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[faun_tumnus]

[Tumnus shakes his head without looking up, not recognizing the voice just yet. His dark brown hair is plastered to his head, horns poking out even more apparently without the cover of the normally full curls.

He speaks softly, his voice choked with pain and something far deeper. He had promised himself and Lucy that henwould only ever serve good after he escaped the vile hold of Jadis ..]

I should not .. I should not be allowed around the people here..

[He leans back then, his blue-grey gaze rising to the dark sky overhead. He pays no mind to the pouring rain, doubting even this tumultuous downpour will ever cleanse him from what he's done. His lower furred half is as wet as his head, fur plastered and dripping onto the ground he sits upon.

Still the faun remains. Even though he looks clean, he feels far from it.]

I very much doubt that I have any place amongst the good people here at all .. I should be sent back..

[He sounds as wretched as he feels, but there is a certain heaviness to his words. He believes himself better off there .. He had proven himself unworthy of having been saved..]

[hidingnolonger]

[Raven wasn't exactly sure how to take that statement - until she realized what exactly might have happened. Her fists clench and unclench - she'd seen the results of what could and would happen when people were infected, when they were out of control.

It didn't matter who you were, you hurt your friends, people you loved. She'd seen it. What had been left of Bobby had been proof that there had been no restraint.

Her fingers loosened.]

What, sent back to...nothing?

[She rested her hands on her hips and looked down.]

You were one of them, weren't you. [It's not an accusation, persay - simply a statement.]

[faun_tumnus]

[Tumnus laughs, but the sound is forced and bitter. He looks at her then, his blue-grey gaze finally falling upon her strangely attractive face. He stares into those yellow eyes as she stares down at him and his voice is hollow.]

Yes .. Sent back to nothing. Nothing is what I deserve ..

[At her next statement he flinches as if struck and looks away, hands clutching at the fur atop his thighs.]

I was ..

[hidingnolonger]

[It could have been him. It could have been this half beast, half man that had killed Bobby - that had mutiliated all the perfection that was her friend; the one that had called her beautiful when no one else ever had.

It was possible this was the culprit. Likely, even.

Of course, there were many others that it could have been, too. Many others that had been infected by the virus and absolutely out of their minds with rage and bloodlust and insanity. It hadn’t been them. It had just been a shell, a hollow existence of the person they’d been before.

She couldn’t blame them. She wanted too - she wanted deeply for someone to pay for what had been done to Bobby.

But she couldn’t.

Raven stared down at him for some time before she responded, taking in that face that so reminded her of her brother.]

It wasn’t your fault.

[The words are almost painful to say - but it’s the truth.]

[faun_tumnus]

[It wasn't just a possibility or likelihood, Raven .. Tumnus was most decidedly the one responsible for brutalizing your dear Bobby Drake. He'd enjoyed it too, at the time; though the same could certainly not be said of him now.

Where he had been bloodthirsty and full of rage then, then faun was now a shell of himself and forever attached to the guilt of what he had done. He shakes his head, shoulders shaking as other the nausea that wars with his guilt and disgust.]

F-friends .. I s-s-slaughtered my f-f-friends .. There w-was s-s-so m-m-much b-b-bl-blood..

[The memories are on him and his stomach clenches threateningly.]

[hidingnolonger]

Look.

[Raven sat down hard next to him and rested her elbows on her knees. The rain was still coming in torrential sheets, plastering her red hair to her skull.]

It was a virus that made you do it, okay? From what I understand, infected people couldn’t help it. You can’t beat yourself up over it forever.

[faun_tumnus]

[Tumnus' miserable gaze follows Raven as she flops down next to him, his ears flicking slightly at her words.

Oh, Raven .. this particular faun can beat himself up over things far longer than you're given him credit. He was going to hand over amchild to the White Witch, after all. He was a bad faun and this simply cemented the fact..]

B-b-but w-what if they d-do n-n-not all c-come b-b-back? I h-have s-seen n-n-no s-sign of the D-d-daughter of Eve, C-c-cl-chloe .. I h-have s-seen a p-p-post by B-bo-bobby, b-but n-not s-sh-she..

[It was bad enough that he killed her, but to think that he killed her and doomed her to non-existence?? BUMMER!]

[hidingnolonger]

[This…this would be the time that Raven stiffens - her entire body goes absolutely rigid and numb because he’s said the name Bobby and that means he killed Bobby. It means he mutilated and brutalized one of the sweetest and kindest people she’s ever met and the sole person that has ever, ever accepted her for what she was.

She swallows the urge to get up and leave - she had to take into account that Bobby was alive by some miracle and that it wasn’t the faun’s fault.

And that, knowing what she did of Bobby, he would forgive the faun.]

Hey. Hey. [She quelled her anger and swallowed it back, and instead lifted a hand to rest on the fauns shoulder.]

It wasn’t you - it wasn’t your fault. She’ll come back. [Raven hoped.] Bobby did - [And you’re damn lucky for that, Tumnus-] - and she will, too.

[faun_tumnus]

[Tumnus falls silent and still as Raven freezes alongside him. He might have missed the shift had he been looking elsewhere, but his gaze had been right upon the young mutant so he witnessed the tensing.

She knew Bobby .. God save his miserable soul .. she knew him.

He tenses as her hand rises and touches his shoulder, uncertain what the pretty blue skinned girl was going to do. Her reaction is, in the least, surprising. He searches those fascinating yellow eyes and softly exhales, though it quivers slightly.

She might feel the slight tremor beneath her hand as he shakes beneath the rains' fall, but it has nothing to do with the downpour itself.]

I c-can only p-pray that you are c-c-correct.

[hidingnolonger]

[She can't blame the faun - and she has to find it in her to forgive him, otherwise, it's going to continue to eat at her and fester into something rotten and rancid in her soul. She was quiet for a few moments and as the rain slid through her hair and down her back, Raven gave his shoulder a light squeeze.

It would...be alright. Somehow.]

Listen...Everything will work out. You can't blame yourself for something that was out of your control.

[faun_tumnus]

[He searches that young face a moment more before offering the slightest of nods in acceptance. It would be some time before the faun would forgive himself fully for the incident, but at least others were willing to set aside blame.

She squeezes his shoulder lightly and he raises his hand gently to rest atop her own.]

Thank you ..

[For her words .. for forgiving him .. for choosing the higher path and not harming him. Who knows which he means, but his thanks are genuine as his gaze meets hers.]

[hidingnolonger]

[Raven can't say that she understands - it wasn't her in his position, but she knows that it easily could have been.

Raven doesn't know exactly what he's thanking her for, but she nods anyway, and she meets his eyes - eyes that were strikingly, uncannily similar to her brother Charles.

She shifts a little, and instead of just her hand on his shoulder, she pulls him into a tight hug.]

[faun_tumnus]

[His was certainly a position that it was hard to empathize with and he didn't expect anyone to try. It's the simple fact that she is willing to hear him out and bears him no ill will that will go a long way in helping him compartmentalize and heal from this.

Then she shifts her hand and moves to hug him and for a moment the faun is too stunned to react. Then the tension leaves his form and his arms rise and engulf the girl in a tight hug, one hand rising to rest on her wet hair.]

Thank you.

[It's a silly thing to repeat what he'd already said, but he cannot help himself, holding the blue skinned girl close to him.]

[hidingnolonger]

[Maybe she needed the hug too - because when it's returned, she feels something leave her. Something rotten and nasty that had been threatening to grow into a ball of hatred fled her body then, and ran down her skin and buried itself deep into the ground. She felt lighter, freer.

She couldn't find words and she was glad for the rain, because it hid her tears.]

You're welcome.

[Her words were mumbled and quiet, and she gives him a final squeeze before she pulls back, and rests a hand on his shoulder once more.]

...You should really get out of the rain.

[faun_tumnus]

[A good hug was able to help in ways that people might not be able to understand until they receive one; this hug was one of those. Tumnus holds the girl until she begins to pull away, releasing her with a soft exhale.

He felt .. lighter. The heavy weight that had begun to weigh him down wasn't gone entirely, but it felt far easier to handle now. He wishes hiding the tears was so easy for him, but he's made no try at it thus far so it bothers him not.

When she mentions coming in from the rain his lips quirk into a half smile, but a smile all the same. He tilts his head back and exhales, eyes closing as he lets the rain hit his face for another moment or two; then he nods and looks to her again.]

I don't believe I even asked your name .. [He tilts his head slightly, ears flicking forward.]

[hidingnolonger]

[Raven hesitates at the question - she could tell him her real name, but that would mean later, when she was blonde and pretty and ‘normal’ again, he would be able to identify this…freak form of hers.

That…wouldn’t do. Only Bobby knew that Raven Darkholme and Mystique - blonde and beautiful and blue and freakish - were all one in the same, and it would stay that way.

She smiles at him, and offers a gloved hand - now ruined leather ones that she’d found in the Keep proper.]

Call me Mystique.